Search found 23 matches

by Maj
Tue May 30, 2017 12:49 pm
Forum: The Pub
Topic: New to The Board? Then introduce yourself here...
Replies: 811
Views: 62452

Re: New to The Board? Then introduce yourself here...

Wait now. I was searching online (undrunk mind you) for some meaningless shit and I found "Modern Drunkard Magazine"! I says to myself, I says self, where do I know that name and that's a pretty good idea for an online magazine. Large print too. But wait, says I. Don't I drunk post on a drunkard for...
by Maj
Mon May 15, 2017 2:47 pm
Forum: The Pub
Topic: The 1%
Replies: 390
Views: 24916

Re: The 1%

1 percent aqueous humour;

1 percent Interstitial fluid; and

1 percent vaginal dryness
by Maj
Mon May 15, 2017 2:34 pm
Forum: Drinking Stories
Topic: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk
Replies: 195
Views: 26772

Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

#254
Bought some weed off a hooker for $20.00. She begged me to let her give me a blow job because she needed money for cocaine. I espoused the virtues of marijuana and alcohol but she wasn't buying it. She was sad so I gave her $40.00 more and took one for charity.
by Maj
Tue Apr 12, 2016 4:12 pm
Forum: The Pub
Topic: Canada, Toronto. Where to buy whiskey?
Replies: 16
Views: 854

Re: Canada, Toronto. Where to buy whiskey?

Illiniwek wrote:
peetie44 wrote: Coxwell Ave,
Dude, ... he he ... you lived on cock swell ... he he
Belive it or not, that's where the hookers are.
by Maj
Tue Apr 12, 2016 4:10 pm
Forum: The Pub
Topic: Canada, Toronto. Where to buy whiskey?
Replies: 16
Views: 854

Re: Canada, Toronto. Where to buy whiskey?

You buy whiskey at the Lick Bo. Where else would you buy it? Come by my house and I'll give you a drink on it.
by Maj
Tue Apr 12, 2016 4:06 pm
Forum: Drinking Stories
Topic: Do You Remember Your First Drink?
Replies: 64
Views: 5759

Re: Do You Remember Your First Drink?

I stole an ice cold Labatt's Blue from my father's beer fridge in the basement and chugged it while I kept an eye on the fucker through the basement window while he was working in the backyard. Didn't love it, but I did love #2 to #89,856! (I did the math)
by Maj
Tue Apr 12, 2016 3:57 pm
Forum: Drinking Stories
Topic: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk
Replies: 195
Views: 26772

Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

# 248 got pissed drunk Party at a friends place. I got super loaded and woke up in his room that was in the cellar. I had to take a pee immediatly but there was no bathroom. I knew that there was a sink somewhere but it was pitch dark. Then I remebered the guest toilet on first floor. I hurried to ...
by Maj
Tue Apr 12, 2016 3:54 pm
Forum: Drinking Stories
Topic: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk
Replies: 195
Views: 26772

Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

#244 Got invited to my neighbors' house when I was already hammered. Proceeded to drink all of their booze, put a cigarette burn on their couch and keep them up until almost 6 in the morning by loudly slurring personal anecdotes at them. They haven't spoken to me since... Don't sweat it . . . it's ...
by Maj
Tue Apr 12, 2016 3:50 pm
Forum: The Pub
Topic: The 1%
Replies: 390
Views: 24916

Re: The 1%

1% arcing ropes of jism.
by Maj
Mon Aug 17, 2015 12:36 pm
Forum: The Pub
Topic: The 1%
Replies: 390
Views: 24916

Re: The 1%

1% Fentanyl
1% Krokodil
1% Flakka
lace with Paprika to throw off the dogs
by Maj
Mon Aug 17, 2015 12:11 pm
Forum: Drinking Stories
Topic: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk
Replies: 195
Views: 26772

Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Palinka wrote:
Dear Booze wrote:Making love to an individual with a HANDicap adds character and commands respect.
Image
Aww shit I get it now . . . Andy Capp was my favorite cartoon as a kid . . . crazy wife beating drunk.
by Maj
Mon Aug 17, 2015 12:00 pm
Forum: Drinking Stories
Topic: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk
Replies: 195
Views: 26772

Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

#238 Fell off a wall and fucked up my shin . . . not sure how that resulted in me having no money in my wallet in the morning #239 Stole a cowboy hat from a Cuban gaucho . . . gave it back to him when he asked me nicely #240 hooked a 100 plus pound King Mackeral . . . lost it at the boat, BUT NOT BE...
by Maj
Mon Jan 05, 2015 6:24 pm
Forum: Drinking Stories
Topic: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk
Replies: 195
Views: 26772

Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

#233 Now I can get pretty hammered and still walk a straight line but add some marijuana and hash and I get some kind of inner ear thing . . . it's not the liquor. On a guy's weekend a few months ago we were enjoying a late night bonfire when yours truly took a big hit from the bong and decided it w...
by Maj
Fri Dec 26, 2014 12:30 pm
Forum: The Pub
Topic: New to The Board? Then introduce yourself here...
Replies: 811
Views: 62452

Re: New to The Board? Then introduce yourself here...

I'm reading Hemingway at the moment and that drunken bastard's prose has got me in a mind to write and to drink and when I drink the birds sing and the bees buzz and when I go out in the meadow and the breeze blows it takes me back to the fields of Normandy where I met the woman that would eventuall...
by Maj
Wed Jul 02, 2014 6:39 am
Forum: The Pub
Topic: The 1%
Replies: 390
Views: 24916

Re: The 1%

1% Blue Sky

"It may be blue, but it's the bomb."