The Rural Imbiber

A forum to post your thoughts about the art and beauty of getting loaded.

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rog_kowalski
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The Rural Imbiber

Post by rog_kowalski » Thu Aug 11, 2011 8:26 pm

New guy. Long time admirer. I am chipping away at a low-tax case of Seagrams 83; all are welcome to enjoy this overpriced corn rye ... while it lasts. Pull up a proverbial chair, and if you can find the place, bring a box of bullets to crack off later in the evening.

I've a brief question to hit this off. How many of us are outside of the city limits? Or for that matter, how many of us first learned the beauty )and bite( of a bottle off a gravel road?

I often feel as though I hit, then lost, my drinking stride many years ago at the ripe old age of 23. Memories have boosted the numbers and inflated the stories, though I cannot help but feel as though when I see a table full of empty double rye-and-waters, I am in the company of my own kind.

Glad to find you all here.

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Wingman
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Re: The Rural Imbiber

Post by Wingman » Fri Aug 12, 2011 8:39 am

i'll have summa that rye, thanks. welcome to paradise.
Stupid should hurt.

"We're better than mere people, we're DRUNKARDS."
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Jiggers McCoy
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Re: The Rural Imbiber

Post by Jiggers McCoy » Fri Aug 12, 2011 3:28 pm

Gimme one of them beer-tower table-taps, but fill it with Old Crow.

I grew up in the rural outskirts of a smallish college town, and my grandparents lived in an honest-to-God log cabin a few hours away. I remember I was 7 or so and Grandpa would give me sips of his Old Milwaukee's Best and would let me crush his empties, which he kept in an oil drum until it was time to take to take em to the scrap yard. Memories.
• "Avoiding the darker alcohols like bourbon, red wine and dark rum might lessen [a hangover] and you might also dance better if you wear a tutu instead of trousers." - FKR

• "If you wanna 'talk about' my drinking, it better be about how fucking awesome it is." - Me

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ThirstyDrunk
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Re: The Rural Imbiber

Post by ThirstyDrunk » Fri Aug 12, 2011 4:31 pm

Jitters, I think it had to be either Old Milwaukee or Milwaukee's Best. There's a difference. I bet it was Old Mil.

rog, welcome, I'll have exactly 30 Old Milwaukee beers.
Cheers

hoopie doopie
To be fair, I'm drunker than you.

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ThirstyDrunk
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Re: The Rural Imbiber

Post by ThirstyDrunk » Fri Aug 12, 2011 4:34 pm

Oh yea, I'm from Xenia so I got y'all beat.
To be fair, I'm drunker than you.

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Wingman
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Re: The Rural Imbiber

Post by Wingman » Fri Aug 12, 2011 6:28 pm

born and raised in the country, but had shoes and whatnot growin' up.

now in the 'burbs, but we do get snakes, coons, goslings, hawks, bigass turtles, etc., etc. in the yard pretty often.

now, toss me a highlife, and keep 'em coming.

cheers!

oh, and:

"post drunk, post often, and post drunk often."
Stupid should hurt.

"We're better than mere people, we're DRUNKARDS."
--ThirstyDrunk

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slipperyyoke
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Re: The Rural Imbiber

Post by slipperyyoke » Fri Aug 12, 2011 6:47 pm

Mark me down as rural.

Home sweet home:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pennsyltucky*

Weez ain't as fancy as them thar Pittsburgh and Philly boys, but were doinn alright.

I'll take a few of those Milwaukee's. Cheers.

*Eat a dick Carville.
The man who intoxicates himself on bad whisky is sometimes moved to kill his wife and set his house on fire, but the victim of applejack is capable of blowing up a whole town with dynamite and of reciting original poetry to every surviving inhabitant.

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Wingman
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Re: The Rural Imbiber

Post by Wingman » Fri Aug 12, 2011 6:50 pm

there's city folk on here, too, though. dingbat and tbc come to mind. we're all about uniting the tribe, here.
Stupid should hurt.

"We're better than mere people, we're DRUNKARDS."
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Jags
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Re: The Rural Imbiber

Post by Jags » Fri Aug 12, 2011 8:02 pm

I grew up in Pennsyltuky but have lived in FL, NJ, Philly, and downtown Arlington VA before settling in beautiful rural NOVA 1/2 hour from WV. Much different mindset from the blue collar environment I came from here.
-------------------------------------

The older I get, the better I was.

It's damn expensive to look this cheap.

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coqui_chris
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Re: The Rural Imbiber

Post by coqui_chris » Sat Aug 13, 2011 10:08 am

slipperyyoke wrote:Mark me down as rural.

Home sweet home:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pennsyltucky*

Weez ain't as fancy as them thar Pittsburgh and Philly boys, but were doinn alright.

I'll take a few of those Milwaukee's. Cheers.

*Eat a dick Carville.
True story: I get scared when 'MMR starts to get crackly on the radio during a car-ride ...
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Jiggers McCoy
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Re: The Rural Imbiber

Post by Jiggers McCoy » Sat Aug 13, 2011 12:38 pm

ThirstyDrunk wrote:Jitters, I think it had to be either Old Milwaukee or Milwaukee's Best. There's a difference. I bet it was Old Mil.

rog, welcome, I'll have exactly 30 Old Milwaukee beers.
Cheers

hoopie doopie
I am shamed.

I think it was actually Milwaukee's Best Light, because I remember the blue lettering. When I was in college I didn't know what to bring to a party so I brought a case of it, figuring what was good enough for Grandpa was good enough for anybody. I was promptly informed that no one else wanted it, so I had to drink it all myself. It was fine with me, as everybody else had Natty light, while Beast actually still tastes like beer.
• "Avoiding the darker alcohols like bourbon, red wine and dark rum might lessen [a hangover] and you might also dance better if you wear a tutu instead of trousers." - FKR

• "If you wanna 'talk about' my drinking, it better be about how fucking awesome it is." - Me

rog_kowalski
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Re: The Rural Imbiber

Post by rog_kowalski » Tue Aug 16, 2011 9:47 pm

Wingman wrote:now, toss me a highlife, and keep 'em coming."
Will do sir.

I opened with this topic as it broached an ever-increasing gulf in my life: the rural-urban divide. The obligatory backstory: My formative years were spent working on the family farm, and ostensibly, when given the chance to pursue post-secondary education, I dove further into this field. In doing so, I spent several years in three large urban centers while accumulating a few expensive pieces of parchment. In these places, I discovered the theater that is a well-made martini, and learned of the developed and sophisticated palette required for thorough appreciation of Islay malts. All such things were both new and exciting and thoroughly untested experiences for me. All were good times. I met drunkards of every background and color. Of most dispositions and of many vocations. However, to this point, I (naively) had never known a bar that charged more than $2.50 a shot for a cocktail, maybe $3.00 for a beer, and yet I was surrounded many times by people willing to ante thrice or more that, in places that were happy to make one feel as though they were privileged to do so.

I longed for my country drinking roots on many such occasion: The unsophisticated and non-judgmental swilling of a good deal of booze - sometimes of dubious origin - while oiling the social machinery of the countryside. The contrasts were striking. During said urban years, I found that in most circles (there were odd and delightful exceptions), pulling out a bottle or buying more than a half a dozen beers was cause for acclaim and the subsequent telling and re-telling of the night's events, however trite. The rural imbiber in me never knew that people actually only bought six beer with the intention of drinking four. Never thought that a fifth would ever be intended to last, unscrewed, for more than an hour or two. And certainly never anticipated that unremarkable, every day bullshit with a beer in hand would be spoken of or remembered as anything other than "the usual course of events". Drinking back home was never an event. It was what we did. Some might even say it closely mirrored the ethereal "who we were". Coupled with the drinking itself was the divergent attitude towards the drunkard. In the cities I was an irrepressible alcoholic, the spawn of satan when letting loose in less acceptable times of the day or days of the week. Back home, I was simply another guy who liked to tip a glass.

After longing for the green green grass of home for the better part of a decade, the move was recently made to chunk the research profession and get back to the places and people who shaped me as a drinker. Now I may have some better gin in the cupboard, a few more memorable bottles of scotch for the occasions. But you will find me, more often than not, watering down my bottom shelf rye - ice included - and cracking yet another ice cold, horse-piss, dollar-a-can pilsner. Forgive me father, for I don't mind being the common cannon fodder pisser.

You are all welcome to stop by when passing through. I am certain that you will fit in fine.

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Jags
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Re: The Rural Imbiber

Post by Jags » Tue Aug 16, 2011 10:48 pm

It disheartens me to find out you are a bible thumper. Your writing was exciting me until you had to bring up religion.

Do you know why Jesus quit eating M&Ms?

[point at palm]

Because they kept falling through the hole.
-------------------------------------

The older I get, the better I was.

It's damn expensive to look this cheap.

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Jiggers McCoy
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Re: The Rural Imbiber

Post by Jiggers McCoy » Wed Aug 17, 2011 12:15 pm

It is harder to find cheap booze in the cit-ay, but I do love an urban dive. No place better.
• "Avoiding the darker alcohols like bourbon, red wine and dark rum might lessen [a hangover] and you might also dance better if you wear a tutu instead of trousers." - FKR

• "If you wanna 'talk about' my drinking, it better be about how fucking awesome it is." - Me

rog_kowalski
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Re: The Rural Imbiber

Post by rog_kowalski » Wed Aug 17, 2011 1:30 pm

Jags wrote:It disheartens me to find out you are a bible thumper. Your writing was exciting me until you had to bring up religion.
You're going to have to brief me on how this could be derived from my little rant, as I am and always have been a stalwart atheist. Feel free to be excited.

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