Amateur night is upon us

[Dear Booze]

First, I'd like to wish all my brothers and sisters in spirits a happy new year. May this be the best yet.

With that out of the way, I'd like to take a moment to discuss the horrible problem with this annual ringing out-with-the-old-and-in-with-the-new bullshit. Let's face it. It is amateur night. It's the night when really stupid people try to behave like us.

Sure. It's flattering, but can you imagine if we were all, say, professional race car drivers. And on one night of the year everyone thought it would be a good idea to go out and drive like they were Nascar professionals? They would cause some serious problems... even deaths. And soon folks would start looking down on the sport of auto racing. Some would start talking about having it banned all together.

Tonight's the night when assholes who have no business drinking decide it's a good idea to drink. A lot.

And what can us professionals do about it? Nothing. We have to sit back and take it.

[AntonArkydivich]

Tonight's the night when assholes who have no business drinking decide it's a good idea to drink. A lot.

And what can us professionals we do about it? Nothing. We have to sit back and take it.

Hear, hear! A voice of reason amidst shitty clubs and drunk white girls!

[Dear Booze]

Hear, hear! A voice of reason amidst shitty clubs and drunk white girls!

HEAR HEAR!

Wait a sec... I really like drunk white girls. ...

But, HEAR HEAR!

[JimLahey]

A friend of mine decided to play drunk last night and ended up falling asleep in his chair, crashing his head into the edge of a table and needed to get stitches in the hospital at 3am. HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

[Zog]

Well, I drove out to see my folks today and my Dad, after a drink or two, asked me what my New Years resolution was. I said I did not have one because the concept is fucking stupid. When I decide I want to do something, then I do it. He said maybe it should be to quit drinking and then boasted about how he once quit drinking for a whole year, like it's some big fucking deal, all while sucking on his 12 oz screwdriver.

I just looked at him and said, "Dad, I know you were in the Army but you never saw any action. I did three fucking tours in Afghanistan, so shut the fuck up and let's just drink to another year".

He did. He's a prick but he's my Dad and I love him.

[mistah willies]

^

There you go.

I'll drink to that. It's kinda unconditional, isn't it.

Yes

It most certainly is.

Cheers bud.