Just bought some Malort

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calx
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Just bought some Malort

Post by calx » Tue Dec 04, 2018 10:22 pm

Anyone tried this stuff? I actually heard about it first on this website from an awesome old article if anyone can find it.

I'm planning on giving a shot to all my friends this Christmas coz I love em so much. :D
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ThirstyDrunk
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Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by ThirstyDrunk » Wed Dec 05, 2018 7:29 am

CHUG THAT SHIT!
try it

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Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by ThirstyDrunk » Wed Dec 05, 2018 7:36 am

try it

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Surreal
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Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by Surreal » Wed Dec 05, 2018 8:27 am

Some sick twisted bastard sent me that during the old MDM Xmas Booze Exchange.

I’ve chugged a lot of shit. Even chugged some merlot w/ our dear friend Thirsty. Well, truth be told he chugged about the whole bottle and left very little for me...... but that Malort shit is pure evil. I can’t think of a worse tasting booze than Malort.

That being said, grab yourself some and report back.

On a side note - it’s a Chicago tradition. The Jeppson’s Malort. They had a contest some time ago and the locals were asked to dream up a new marketing slogan. Here’s what they came up with:

Malort, kick your mouth in the balls!
Malort, when you need to unfriend someone IN PERSON.
Malort, tonight's the night you fight your dad.
Malort, the Champagne of pain.
Malort, turning taste-buds into taste-foes for generations.
Drink Malort, it's easier than telling people you have nothing to live for.
Malort, what soap washes its mouth out with.
Malort, these pants aren't going to sh** themselves.
fuck em man, it ain't easy walkin the righteous path.
- Hoss

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Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by drunkin' Wisconsinite » Wed Dec 05, 2018 11:55 am

it's like vomiting in reverse

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Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by peetie44 » Wed Dec 05, 2018 1:52 pm

calx wrote:
Tue Dec 04, 2018 10:22 pm
Anyone tried this stuff? I actually heard about it first on this website from an awesome old article if anyone can find it.

I'm planning on giving a shot to all my friends this Christmas coz I love em so much. :D
You poor bastard...
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Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by Patchez » Wed Dec 05, 2018 9:42 pm

Al these horror stories make me want to find it even more. Masochistic drinking anyone?
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Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by Badfellow » Thu Dec 06, 2018 9:18 am

Malort: it's like there's a party in your mouth and everyone's invited... including the dozen or so gutter punks who pissed on the floor and burned down the house.
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Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by oettinger » Fri Dec 07, 2018 12:02 pm

It`s one of the few bad liquors that get even worse by mixing them with something
Is it just me or did the boxed bumwine cork a little bit?
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Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by drunkin' Wisconsinite » Fri Dec 07, 2018 2:03 pm


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Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by Badfellow » Fri Dec 07, 2018 2:36 pm

Speaking of Malort, this guy is a freakin tank.
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