The say what's on your mind thread ....

[Gaston]

What's with you all having sex on the ground?

It's the year 2000 now why can't you get with modern times and bend her over a kitchen sink?

Sometimes, you start there or the kitchen table, bathroom, alley down the street...sometimes even a bed...but somehow we always end up on the floor...god damnit, I love you floor...and I really need to get you steam cleaned, now that I think about what I've done on you....

[****]

Bleeding is one of those things that should be avoided during sex, in so far as it is reasonably possible. And rug burn takes forever to go away...

I don't wanna die without a few more scars

as your life coach, i can help you attain these goals.

[Illiniwek]

I just came back from the grocery store. Bought a chicken and some St. Louis-cut ribs for dinner. I saw this mix of marinated red peppers and garlic cloves and thought, nah, I bet that's horrible. So I got a little, just out of curiosity. OMG! It's fucking delicious. Who knew the garlic could be tamed to the point that you can pop it in your mouth whole? Outstanding.

[Coriolanus]

I think all-day BBQ's might be the finest of fine drinking events. Keg beer all day, from 11am onwards. Irish whiskey, Maker's Mark, handles of rail vodka and rum mixed with economy-sized America's Choice fruit juices and knock-off brand name soda. Meat as far as the eye can see; the standard burgers and dogs; grilled onions and portabella mushrooms, home-made potato/sweet potato salad, corn on the cob, pork chops, teriyaki steak skewers, BBQ bacon-shrimp skewers... suffice it to say, Grill Master Coriolanus took care of everybody's stomachs. We started drinking at 11am and kept it going until around 3 or so (I can't remember, my girlfriend had to have my friends carry my passed out body to a cab so she could put me to bed, which she sorta succeeded in, even though I woke up in all my clothes...). It was one big crazy drunk-fest. Now that Spring is sprung, it looks like this will become a weekly event.

[peetie44]

BARBECUE??!!

Living by the credo, "if you can kill it, I will grill it", I once Bar-B-Qd two entire deer during a "gentleman's retreat" (read: the gf kicked me out) on the Six Nations Reservation, near Hamilton, Ontario, Canada (ca. 1989). We were on a 2-day alky-coke fest and I let it be known that I could BBQ anything. Native Americans/Canadians will call your bluff every time, so I had to deliver.

The Indians sent some young braves to my house in Toronto, where the old-lady gladly gave them one of my giant expanded-metal "grills". Some other youngsters dug a hole and bordered the top with a layer of "borrowed" cinder blocks, the grill on top of those, and then two more layers of stacked blocks. For a lid, a piece of plywood; for a chimney, a discarded, wood-reinforced refridgerator crate.

We had already built a bed of coals from burning whole maple logs before "assembly" of the grill and shoveled them into one side of the hole. The "chimney" was placed off-set from the banked coals on one side of the grill; the rest of the grill was covered with the piece of plywood. I used a length of pvc pipe, inserted at a 45-degree angle to add air-draw, under the side with the coals, so the heat and smoke would be directed up the chimney.

The deer were quartered and piled under the upright refridgerator crate, for indirect-heat cooking. (side note: when part of your grill is wood and cardboard you better know WHAT the hell you're doing)

Lots of basting with a combo of bacon fat (10lbs!), olive-oil and a water/vinegar/red pepper sauce, many near-disaster flare-ups and 8 hours later, we dined like savage kings.

Did I mention we were drunk and coked-up?

[Coriolanus]

BARBECUE??!!

Living by the credo, "if you can kill it, I will grill it", I once Bar-B-Qd two entire deer during a "gentleman's retreat" (read: the gf kicked me out) on the Six Nations Reservation, near Hamilton, Ontario, Canada (ca. 1989). We were on a 2-day alky-coke fest and I let it be known that I could BBQ anything. Native Americans/Canadians will call your bluff every time, so I had to deliver.

The Indians sent some young braves to my house in Toronto, where the old-lady gladly gave them one of my giant expanded-metal "grills". Some other youngsters dug a hole and bordered the top with a layer of "borrowed" cinder blocks, the grill on top of those, and then two more layers of stacked blocks. For a lid, a piece of plywood; for a chimney, a discarded, wood-reinforced refridgerator crate.

We had already built a bed of coals from burning whole maple logs before "assembly" of the grill and shoveled them into one side of the hole. The "chimney" was placed off-set from the banked coals on one side of the grill; the rest of the grill was covered with the piece of plywood. I used a length of pvc pipe, inserted at a 45-degree angle to add air-draw, under the side with the coals, so the heat and smoke would be directed up the chimney.

The deer were quartered and piled under the upright refridgerator crate, for indirect-heat cooking. (side note: when part of your grill is wood and cardboard you better know WHAT the hell you're doing)

Lots of basting with a combo of bacon fat (10lbs!), olive-oil and a water/vinegar/red pepper sauce, many near-disaster flare-ups and 8 hours later, we dined like savage kings.

Did I mention we were drunk and coked-up?

That's some serious grillin' right there, Peetie. I heartily salute you. All that flame cooked venison is exciting my stomach. I'm thinking that I'm going to go shoot something and eat it sometime in the near future. Also going to make sure there's plenty of beer to go 'round. But man, that's one serious Indian style pow-wow-cookout you're talking about there. Your "cool" factor just went up like a million points in my eyes.

[felinamojokitty]

i just had a bowl of cereal with milk and after not drinking milk for a couple of years i feel a tad gassy.

[shylock]

Me and my pops went early morning fishing yesterday. We wore em out and had ourselves a good ol'e fashioned southern fish fry. Damn, these are the days worth remembering.

[Gaston]

now I need to go hunting and fishing.....if only I could remember where my guns are....sidenote: shotguns and whiskey, while fun, do not necessarily go together, unless you're duck hunting...then if it flies...it dies. Fishing and beer though...man that's a fucking winning combo right there, just don't pass out in the boat with my friends...they'll leave you there for the whole fricking 80 mile ride back home on the interstate....


man...I'm calling my dad, see if he still has some deer left...I want bbq deer....and elk...but I doubt he has any left...

[shylock]

Congrats on the sig....

shotguns and whiskey, while fun, do not necessarily go together, unless you're duck hunting...then if it flies...it dies.

[Coriolanus]

Schmaltz made a good point in the MDM article "Booze and the Hunt;" don't be one of those fucking yuppies that drives around in a jeep with 4 of his buddies, chugging Bud light cans and blasting away at anything that moves. The hunt is a solemn occasion. It needs no booze to improve it. Save the drinking for afterwards, reminiscing by the fire about past hunts.

Booze and fishing on the other hand, well, nothing more needs to be said except "booze and fishing."

[Steve]

Injured the palm of my hand, half burn/half graze, and it's taking forever to heal. Doesn't look like much but stings like three kinds of bastard whenever I move my thumb.

[Coriolanus]

Boxed wine is unpleasant, but it does the job. I feel like my parents.

[Gin McGuinness]

How do I rustle up some errands for work so I can sit in the pub and get paid for the day?

[Coriolanus]

Lie inventively?