Questions for the church lady...

greygoose · Post by **greygoose** » Tue Mar 22, 2005 12:24 pm

So we're going to look at a church after work, possibly the one the wedding will take place at. What should I ask? I have no idea and, fortunately, am not responsible for any planning.

1. Could we pay you in booze instead of writing a check?
2. We can't smoke in here, can we?
3. When you ask me if I do, is 'maybe' an option?
4. How do you feel about ham and beans?
5. I can't hang the crosses upside down, can I?
6. What branch of the service were you in?
7. I'm very flatulent when nervous. Will this be a problem?
8. I've got a warrant out for my arrest. You'll give me sanctuary
if the cops show up, right?
9. I'm almost done with my state quarters collection; you wouldn't
happen to have Hawaii, would you?

*gets bitch-slapped by Phryne*

I Can Quit Anytime · Post by **I Can Quit Anytime** » Tue Mar 22, 2005 1:32 pm

"Where's the secret broom closet where the groom gets to have a quickie with an old girlfriend before the wedding?

Sgt. HSA · Post by **Sgt. HSA** » Tue Mar 22, 2005 1:39 pm

Are flasks allowed ? This is a deal breaker.

JohnnyT · Post by **JohnnyT** » Tue Mar 22, 2005 1:45 pm

Flasks are a must. I had a few pulls off my flask just before the ceremony, took the edge off, you married guys know what I'm talkin' about?

Sgt. HSA · Post by **Sgt. HSA** » Tue Mar 22, 2005 2:11 pm

JohnnyTequila wrote:Flasks are a must. I had a few pulls off my flask just before the ceremony, took the edge off, you married guys know what I'm talkin' about?

Our ceremony went off late because nobody could find the groom and best men. They finally located us in the bar way in the back of the place. I'd say I had 4-5 in me when I strolled down the aisle.

greygoose · Post by **greygoose** » Tue Mar 22, 2005 2:17 pm

Sgt. HSA wrote:
JohnnyTequila wrote:Flasks are a must. I had a few pulls off my flask just before the ceremony, took the edge off, you married guys know what I'm talkin' about?
Our ceremony went off late because nobody could find the groom and best men. They finally located us in the bar way in the back of the place. I'd say I had 4-5 in me when I strolled down the aisle.

See honey? All the cool kids are doing it.

Sgt. HSA · Post by **Sgt. HSA** » Tue Mar 22, 2005 2:23 pm

the_grey_goose wrote:
Sgt. HSA wrote:
JohnnyTequila wrote:Flasks are a must. I had a few pulls off my flask just before the ceremony, took the edge off, you married guys know what I'm talkin' about?
Our ceremony went off late because nobody could find the groom and best men. They finally located us in the bar way in the back of the place. I'd say I had 4-5 in me when I strolled down the aisle.
See honey? All the cool kids are doing it.

Just be warned: it makes you 'persona non grata' with the mother-in-law.

zak · Post by **zak** » Tue Mar 22, 2005 3:01 pm

Do you have a liqour license or is it byob?
Exactly where to you keep the communion wine?

Fast Cast · Post by **Fast Cast** » Tue Mar 22, 2005 3:29 pm

JohnnyTequila wrote:Flasks are a must. I had a few pulls off my flask just before the ceremony, took the edge off, you married guys know what I'm talkin' about?

We started with the Jager shots at 10:45am in front of the house. Me, my brother (best man), two buddies who were groomsmen and another who wasn't. More shots on the way to the church. Flasks were loaded at the church when guests started to arrive. After the wedding mass, another round of shots on the sidewalk of the church led to a cooler being taken out of the limo and conveniently placed behind the receiving line. Once we got in the limos to head to the inn where we had the reception, all bets were off. All-in-all, it was a nice little warm-up to the 4.5 hour open bar. :D

Start early, drink often. It's your special day, have a blast!

.... · Post by **....** » Tue Mar 22, 2005 3:36 pm

the_grey_goose wrote:So we're going to look at a church after work, possibly the one the wedding will take place at. What should I ask? I have no idea and, fortunately, am not responsible for any planning.

1. Could we pay you in booze instead of writing a check?
2. We can't smoke in here, can we?
3. When you ask me if I do, is 'maybe' an option?
4. How do you feel about ham and beans?
5. I can't hang the crosses upside down, can I?
6. What branch of the service were you in?
7. I'm very flatulent when nervous. Will this be a problem?
8. I've got a warrant out for my arrest. You'll give me sanctuary
if the cops show up, right?
9. I'm almost done with my state quarters collection; you wouldn't
happen to have Hawaii, would you?

*gets bitch-slapped by Phryne*

Hawaii won't be out for a couple of years. I think the newest one is Wisconsin.

Questions for the church lady...

Questions for the church lady...

Re: Questions for the church lady...