Are robot kittens coming to steal your pants? (pics)

[MethFront]

Let's have some beers!





Podkovan Dark

Meth says: The label on this Czech beer states that the brewery has been around since 1434. That's like, way long ago... before Columbus' day even. Like all good dark beers, it's mellow, slightly sweet and surprisingly light. I'm not certain why I decided to start with the 3.8% beer. It sounded like a bad idea at the time, and it still does.

Rating: 4 out of #





Weyerbacher Imperial Pumpkin Ale

Meth says: Holy Fisting Fingers that is the creepiest label I've ever seen on a bottle. And I'm a Unibroue man. It says it's brewed with Pumpkin, Cardamom, Cinnamon, Nutmeg and Clovers. Wait, no, that says 'Cloves'. Although I bet I could get people to buy clover beer around March.

Hell, I'd probably buy it.

Anyway this 8% ale doesn't taste like pumpkin pie. It's spicy and very sweet and pretty fucking delicious. But it most certainly does not taste like pumpkin pie.

Rating: & out of 9





Ommegang Three Philosophers (quadrupel) 2005

Meth says: Well that's pretty much the most pretentious beer i've seen in a long time. I'm the most pretentious person I know, so maybe this will be a good match. 9.8% and it manages to be sweeter than Pepsi. I'm probably not supposed to be chugging this out of a plastic cup, but I'm too lazy to clean any glasses. And by lazy, I mean drunk.

Technically, this is a lambic. I pretty much despise lambics the way that guy in Sidewinder hated Monroe. Who goes to make a beer and then thinks, "Hey, you know what this needs?" A little lightbulb appears over his pointy head. "This needs cherries!" I mean seriously. What were they drinking when they came up with that idea? Because, maybe I should be having some of that instead.

No, I get to drink this stuff. Which isn't half bad... for a lambic. The label quotes Plato, "Philosophy begins in wonder." I'm still wondering why the fuck people thought it was a good idea to put cherries in beer.

It kills the hops, I think that's my problem with lambics in general. That extra sweetening completely overcomes any notes from the hops. And it doesn't just bury them, it punches them in the face a few times before covering them in a sugary tomb.

Rating: e out of π





Woodpecker Cider

Meth says: So it's not actually a beer. Get over it. Woodpecker is sweet and runs at 4.2%. It has a tart finish, but that works here because it just keeps pushing me to drink more to get rid of it by flooding my senses with crisp, sweet cidery-goodness. I've had better ciders. According to my research, this is a British school-boy drink. Almost a precursor to Stella. It's tasty, although not remarkably so. Maybe I'll have changed my tune by the end of this six-pack.

Rating: h out of 2i where h=6.6260891*10^-34m^2kg/s


I hoped you liked my post about beer.

Please don't delete my post about beer.

[deadpuppiesandwhores]

i drank the hell out of the woodpecker cider overseas, but i cannot seem to find it here in the states. i enjoy most cider ales, but the woodpecker brings back fond memories. very well thought out post. i enjoyed.

[Smatter Noguts]

Wonderful post.
Not enough undrunk connesuers about here to appreciate it, though.
Write about DD's or Rochester or what the fuck inside shit goes on between about three people and you'll have a lot of responses.
God Bless.

[mattgrowler]

Where can I get all of these and drink them right now?

[MethFront]

Where can I get all of these and drink them right now?

The great thing about these UEZ half-tax business zones in Jersey is that they cater to every spectrum of the drinking market. I walk down the hill my tenement sits upon and i'm in a mecca of alcohol. If you're in NH it shouldn't be hard to find the Ommengang and Weyerbacher. I'm lucky to live in an area that hosts a sizeable eastern european population, otherwise i would be pretty hard-up to find some of the beers of which i've grown fond.

[danger awesome]

I agree with your giving Woodpecker a Planck's constant out of 2i (an imaginary rating...), as it really is not great - especially when you compare it to Strongbow + Scrumpy Jack (brewed by the same company), which are both infinitely better.

[maltlicker11]

I hoped you liked my post about beer.

Yes I did and your rating system is genius. (h-bar plonk lol)
It made me pine for another UK/EU real beer tour.

Please don't delete my post about beer.

Well you shoulda put this in TAoGH Mothra-man.

bye

[MeanOldLady]

i don't even drink beer (never finished a full beer in my life. i can't. i get full from drinking water) but i still found this thread to be delightful and hilarious, as did the guy.

post score: % out of 23.

[massivedrunk]

I personnaly rate this thread a * out of ~

[steved2112]

All of those beers look fun to drink. But in the end I want to be buried with a six of Yards ESA.


No a six wouldn't last me for eternity. It's just a formality. Do not waste more than a six of that precious ESA on my corpse.

[The Lush]

Yep, Strongbow is better than Woodpecker, but if that were translated to beer terms it would be like saying Budweiser is better than Coors Light.

If you want cider, and happen to live in Britain, then try Sheppy's.

[ThirstyDrunk]

[quote="Mothmanfront"]I hoped you liked my post about beer.

quote]
I enjoyed this post very much. I've been brewing my own beer for about 20 years now and I would like to see your commentary/rating of any of my concoctions.
(rule #5 in my brewing journal is "No fruit in beer" - bad luck with that)