My Female Prison Penpal

bombardier · Post by **bombardier** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 3:47 am

You may think I am stalker creepy for this, but yeah...

Deployments are boring. I was really bored one day and started Googling names of people I haven't heard from in awhile. (We do the same thing for open source intelligence reporting). One name in particular was a chick that I went to kindergarten through eighth grade with. We were also in the same senior class. I didn't know until I saw her a few chairs away from me at graduation rehersal. We spoke only briefly, and she gave me an impassioned hug as we parted.

I didn't give her too much thought at the time. I had my own life and other things I was concerned with. I went off to college, then to the Air Force. I heard she was working at a restaurant in our hometown. I tried to contact her then, to see why she became a townie, but to no avail.

Our hometown, Grand Island, Nebraska, is not a place that you want to become a townie. It's a socioeconomic death sentence.

When I typed in her name on Google, I found some news articles about her going to prison for burglary and violation of parole. I quickly found the address of the facility she was being held in, and addressed a letter to her.

For a few days in a row, I sent her letters expressing my shock, dismay, and my regrets about not talking to her more when I had the opportunity. I wanted to know what happened to her promising young life.

A couple of weeks later, I started receiving letters from her. She poured her heart out to me. She wrote about how she became addicted to methamphetamines, and her struggle to pay for her addiction. She wrote about our childhood, which she seemed to remember vividly (better than I), even after her 30-day meth binges where she would not eat or sleep. She wrote that my letters take her away from where she is and put her in a better place.

We have been corresponding almost daily for nearly a month now. Her letters have taken a romantic turn. I haven't decided how to respond to that. She gets released this summer. I know that the only place she has to go is back to Grand Island. I know that if she goes there she will hang out with the same people and relapse back into her old addiction, as she has already proved after her first parole.

I have been pondering offering her a room in my house. Weighing the risks against what I am willing to manage in my analytical mind. Can I really help her turn her life around? I just don't know...

Jack Hackett · Post by **Jack Hackett** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 8:05 am

I cannot answer that without looking like an asshole and a sensible person at the same time.

bombardier · Post by **bombardier** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 9:01 am

Yeah, I wasn't really expecting any real advice. Although if anyone has any to offer. I think it would be hilarious.

I'm thinking about playing along just long enough to sleep with her immediately upon her release.

danger awesome · Post by **danger awesome** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 10:26 am

bombardier wrote:Yeah, I wasn't really expecting any real advice. Although if anyone has any to offer. I think it would be hilarious.

I'm thinking about playing along just long enough to sleep with her immediately upon her release.

You're an asshole.

DO IT! :D

Professor Roomie · Post by **Professor Roomie** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 10:40 am

How is this booze related?

Rooster · Post by **Rooster** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 10:40 am

If after a month things have turned romantic, you need to step back and ask yourself "why"?

You're deployed to dirkadirkastan, isolated from everyone you know. She's locked up in the pen, isolated from everyone she knows. Neither one of you have anything to lose by opening up and being intimate because if you go to far, or if the other person judges you, you can simply stop opening the letters.

Every guy wants to be a knight in shining armor, but the strength of your personality alone isn't enough. I suggest you take a small retreat from your current position. Instead of offering her your place, offer to help her find a place of her own near you. This way she's somewhere away from the ol' neighborhood, and while you can certainly be there to help her every step of the way, she's still got to depend on herself to a limited degree. People, despite their frustration sometimes, don't want to be given the world on a silver platter, they want to work for it.
People want a sense of accomplishment, and she's far more likely to straighten herself out if she thinks she's doing it herself. When you're dealing with really self-destructive addiction, a lot of times, it's centered around a lack of self-respect and self-worth. People who feel good about themselves don't burglarize houses.

Post by **Judge** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 10:42 am

People who are in jail (you know who you are) especially for meth related issues are very adept at getting you to feel sorry for them and getting you to want to help. She may be a fine girl and a good old friend but watch out. You may find yourself missing valubles, noticing strange people at your house and most likely becoming so familiar with the local cops you are on a first name basis.

I'd stay away. Besides, have you seen this girl lately? Are you familiar with the effects of long time meth use? Yeech!

Check it out, one afternoon I decided to google some old names, now I'm entwined in a nightmare I can't get out of.

Rooster · Post by **Rooster** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 10:47 am

JudgeLyonell wrote:People who are in jail (you know who you are) especially for meth related issues are very adept at getting you to feel sorry for them and getting you to want to help. She may be a fine girl and a good old friend but watch out. You may find yourself missing valubles, noticing strange people at your house and most likely becoming so familiar with the local cops you are on a first name basis.

I'd stay away. Besides, have you seen this girl lately? Are you familiar with the effects of long time meth use? Yeech!

Check it out, one afternoon I decided to google some old names, now I'm entwined in a nightmare I can't get out of.

Don't worry, it's only a matter of time before Ruiner gets lost on his way home and ends up in Guatemala.

danger awesome · Post by **danger awesome** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 10:55 am

Rooster O'Grundelsucker wrote:
JudgeLyonell wrote:People who are in jail (you know who you are) especially for meth related issues are very adept at getting you to feel sorry for them and getting you to want to help. She may be a fine girl and a good old friend but watch out. You may find yourself missing valubles, noticing strange people at your house and most likely becoming so familiar with the local cops you are on a first name basis.

I'd stay away. Besides, have you seen this girl lately? Are you familiar with the effects of long time meth use? Yeech!

Check it out, one afternoon I decided to google some old names, now I'm entwined in a nightmare I can't get out of.
Don't worry, it's only a matter of time before Ruiner gets lost on his way home and ends up in Guatemala.

We can but hope.

& · Post by & » Sat Mar 17, 2007 11:52 am

Professor Roomie wrote:How is this booze related?

cause he was drinking while writing those letters...it was implied

Trebek · Post by **Trebek** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 12:27 pm

O'ampersand wrote:
Professor Roomie wrote:How is this booze related?
cause he was drinking while writing those letters...it was implied

No, he's deployed, and probably can't drink enough. See people, this is the danger of undrunkeness

& · Post by & » Sat Mar 17, 2007 2:14 pm

Trebek wrote:
O'ampersand wrote:
Professor Roomie wrote:How is this booze related?
cause he was drinking while writing those letters...it was implied
No, he's deployed, and probably can't drink enough. See people, this is the danger of undrunkeness

see, now that's just plain wrong.

undrunk is scary!

steved2112 · Post by **steved2112** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 2:28 pm

bombardier wrote:I have been pondering offering her a room in my house. Weighing the risks against what I am willing to manage in my analytical mind. Can I really help her turn her life around? I just don't know...

Nobody can. If she can't do it on her own, she won't own it. Rooster hits the nail on the head. Maybe you can help her executing some of the details of turning her life around, but the onus has to be upon her for it to mean a damn.

Lushlife · Post by **Lushlife** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 3:04 pm

Too drunk to read through this entire thread (well, quite honestly, even the entire post). But you're from Grand Island? Do you know where Seward is? I went to college there.

There was some lady on Dr. Phil the other day who is only attracted to incarcerated men. I guess she figures she can maintain a stable home life for her daughters if she is married to someone who actually does not and can not live with them. But this doesn't stop her from visiting her honey pie WITH her daughters. They like to sit on Con-Step-Daddy's lap and chat and cuddle. They spend more time being searched and screened prior to each visit than they actually get to visit with him. Takes all kinds I guess.

Agaveman · Post by **Agaveman** » Sat Mar 17, 2007 3:11 pm

I don't mean to come across as harsh by any means, but she'll probably just end-up draining your Booze money. Best to avoid this situtation before it escalates, because it will.

My Female Prison Penpal

My Female Prison Penpal

Re: My Female Prison Penpal