It's Friday, drunks.

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LuckyStrikes
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Friday!

Post by LuckyStrikes »

I'm giddy on Fridays. I'm like a colt, waiting for the stable doors to open so I can run straight for the trough, which is full of liquor.

I keep a low profile at work on Fridays. I slither around, and avoid eye contact with anyone who may suggest something that involves real thought. I wear soft sole shoes on Fridays and I turn the lights off in the hallway leading to my office, hoping that that will discourage aliens from venturing further.

Some Fridays (when I drank too much Thursday night), I put a sticky note on my door "Back In 20 Minutes", lock myself in and sleep for a few hours.

That doesn't stop my phone from ringing. I have an amassment of lines that I use on Fridays.

For conversations that call for my serious, no-nonsense voice I use these:
"This is serious. Very se-ri-ous. You're gonna have to cross your t's and dot your i's on this one. This information is too fresh, get back to me on Monday with more details."

or

"We have to get on this. I mean like, yesterday. I still feel like I'm missing something. Listen, over the weekend doublecheck what you have and get back to me first thing on Monday. I mean first thing!"

For situations that call for sensitve, caring responses:
"Oh geez. I wish I could do something about this. But right now, my dance card is full. You know it's Friday and I'm trying to tie up all my loose ends. Can you come by on Monday and we can discuss it."

or

"I hate that. I hate that I can't help you today. Just too busy. Friday you know. Tell you what, I'll put you down for Monday. Come in around 10 and we'll get started."

The funny thing is, by Monday most of the fires will have died out on their own.
Voices tell me to buy the bigger bottle!

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One for the Frog
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Post by One for the Frog »

I'm not that sensitive. My usual line is:

WHAT? ON FRIDAY?

It works quite often.

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fdoosey
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Post by fdoosey »

I advocate the four-day work week, at least until I can abolish work, or allow drinking on the job.
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WmBurroughs
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Post by WmBurroughs »

i like fridays too lucky. I dont have to work today but i am supposed to work a few hours tomorrow. People should leave people alone on friday. at work.
I drink everyday/everynight
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UnkleLemmy
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Post by UnkleLemmy »

What a beautifull post Lucky. You truly are a muse. I am unfortuantely at work on a friday for the first time in two mothns. We work 4 day weeks in june and july where I work.
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jerryg
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Post by jerryg »

I LOVE FRIDAY!!! I work 9 hr days mon-thurs so I only have to work 'til noon on Friday. Cuts into happy hour a bit during the week, but on Friday I can get started at 12:01!!!! Woooo-hooooo. Less than two hours from now I'll be cracking open my first cold one.

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Post by Combat Rock »

Yeah, Friday rules here cause everyone here leaves at like noon but me ( I work Tues through Sat.) so I'm totally alone and in command ....of nothing. Plus, this is my 9 hour day (helps me get out of work early on Sat.) and I have lots of students here on fridays to do the real work. I usually dick around all day. Not today though, gotta train someone for 3 hours. Still though, that ain't much work for a 9 hour day! Plus I'm usually the only person here on Sat., so I can dick around then too. Kinda like a 3-day work week.
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Joe Twelvepack
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Post by Joe Twelvepack »

Wait, I thought we declared Wednesday to be Friday. Which would make today Sunday. Which makes it a holy day. So why the fuck am I at work?
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Post by MORRISON »

I sorta have a Friday ritual. My gf always comes over on Fridays and spends the weekend. She drinks but not like me. And she gives me shit about it sometimes and even hides my booze from me on Sunday mornings. She gets off earlier than me so she is at the house when I get there. So on my lunch hour I go to the booze store and buy a liter of Beam and a fifth of Smirnof red in the traveler bottle. After work in order to get my initial fix for the evening without her nagging I drive around the neighborhood and pound as much of the vodka as I can in twenty minutes or so. I put the remainder under the seat for Sunday. Then I get home and start in on the Beam which she can't say much about because she has some as well. Ah Friday!

M

LuckyStrikes
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Post by LuckyStrikes »

UnkleLemmy wrote:What a beautifull post Lucky. You truly are a muse. I am unfortuantely at work on a friday for the first time in two mothns. We work 4 day weeks in june and july where I work.
4 day work weeks are so cool!!! Three day weekends every weekend!! I probably couldn't handle it though, and end up with one of those "will work for beer" signs.
Voices tell me to buy the bigger bottle!

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My lame Friday Officially starts NOW!

Post by Atavist »

I'm leaving work. Or in the words of the immortal Homer J Simpson "Marge, I'm Goin to Moes and im comin home drunk"

Well, im actually goin home, and will likely not get drunk, becuase if all the things, a 5:00 AM wake up call tommorrow.

Well, you can't win em all.

Cheers you drunken bastards.
-G.

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Red
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Post by Red »

Five o'clock is sleeping in. Get drunk tonight. Life is short. Enjoy it while you're still ticking.

Stay up late, drive hard, drink enough to feel it, boink like you were going to die at sunrise. Do something before you're worm food.

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Post by Atavist »

Red wrote:Five o'clock is sleeping in. Get drunk tonight. Life is short. Enjoy it while you're still ticking.

Stay up late, drive hard, drink enough to feel it, boink like you were going to die at sunrise. Do something before you're worm food.
I admire and agree with your life philosophy. Except the 5 AM wakup is so I can drive for three hours to go skiing. Last time I was not 100% while skiing, last weekend, I busted my nose. This time I want to enjoy my day, have fun, then get royally fucked up tommorrow nite.

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Post by deadpuppiesandwhores »

Atavist wrote:
Red wrote:Five o'clock is sleeping in. Get drunk tonight. Life is short. Enjoy it while you're still ticking.

Stay up late, drive hard, drink enough to feel it, boink like you were going to die at sunrise. Do something before you're worm food.
I admire and agree with your life philosophy. Except the 5 AM wakup is so I can drive for three hours to go skiing. Last time I was not 100% while skiing, last weekend, I busted my nose. This time I want to enjoy my day, have fun, then get royally fucked up tommorrow nite.
you were not undrunk, but not drunk and broke your nose skiing? how is that not fun? what is wrong woith you?
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Atavist
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Post by Atavist »

deadpuppiesandwhores wrote:
Atavist wrote:
Red wrote:Five o'clock is sleeping in. Get drunk tonight. Life is short. Enjoy it while you're still ticking.

Stay up late, drive hard, drink enough to feel it, boink like you were going to die at sunrise. Do something before you're worm food.
I admire and agree with your life philosophy. Except the 5 AM wakup is so I can drive for three hours to go skiing. Last time I was not 100% while skiing, last weekend, I busted my nose. This time I want to enjoy my day, have fun, then get royally fucked up tommorrow nite.
you were not undrunk, but not drunk and broke your nose skiing? how is that not fun? what is wrong woith you?
DPAW, I had a fucking awesome time, and I have the scars to prove it. I collect them, like little, tiny badges of honor, doled out by some cowardly field commander, who rarely if ever gives out the purple heart, no matter how many times you take one for the team. However, I am paying a pretty penny to go to a top-notch ski resort for the sole purpose of skiing well enough to attract the attention of lovely ski-bunnies, the company of whom I plan on spending tommorrow night with in the hot tub.

I rest my case your honor.

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