Whisky Tops

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peetie44
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Whisky Tops

Post by peetie44 » Mon Sep 19, 2011 3:20 pm

I was wondering...

Since I like to drink my whisky out of a bottle would anyone here have suggestions on how I might take the top off of my whisky bottle? I mean, I kinda like whisky (just so long as it doesn't taste like whisky) but lately I've had trouble getting the top off the bottle. Like...do you take the top off of a bourbon bottle differently than you do off a scotch bottle? Btw...I don't want any wood, peat, smoke, caramel, chocolate, leather, heather, crystal meth, opium or etcetera taste in my whisky, but I find that my taking off the bottle's cap imparts all these flavors.

Also...once I open my whisky bottle, the contents seem to vanish. Am I doing something wrong?
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Re: Whisky Tops

Post by hossthomas » Mon Sep 19, 2011 3:40 pm

you're my hero peetie. i laughed so hard wine came out my nose and dousedd my keyboar
into each life a little stroh's must fall - surreal

i told my landlord and all the other tenants they could fuck off if they don't like hank- hellbound glory

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Re: Whisky Tops

Post by Jiggers McCoy » Mon Sep 19, 2011 3:44 pm

I think it's a language problem. If the bottle has the word "whisky" anywhere, this is not a whisky you will like.

Instead find a whisky that is labeled thusly: "Mike's Hard Lemonade."

This is the kind of whisky you want.
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Re: Whisky Tops

Post by kowalski » Mon Sep 19, 2011 4:20 pm

peetie44 wrote: Also...once I open my whisky bottle, the contents seem to vanish. Am I doing something wrong?
Heh, have you seen Thirsty Drunk around at all?..
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Re: Whisky Tops

Post by Wingman » Mon Sep 19, 2011 5:39 pm

peetie44 wrote: Also...once I open my whisky bottle, the contents seem to vanish. Am I doing something wrong?
hold the bottle with the top towards the ceiling next time.
Stupid should hurt.

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Re: Whisky Tops

Post by ThirstyDrunk » Mon Sep 19, 2011 5:45 pm

Take off cap. Throw across the street. Drink bottle until empty. Throw across the street.
To be fair, I'm drunker than you.

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peetie44
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Re: Whisky Tops

Post by peetie44 » Mon Sep 19, 2011 9:14 pm

ThirstyDrunk wrote:Take off cap. Throw across the street. Drink bottle until empty. Throw across the street.
You are a great drunk...but you are a diseased human.

Thus my envy ferments...

Maybe Jerry Lee can explain it moreb bertter


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EhhUQxjb ... ture=share
"Man i once bought $101 worth of insect candy because it was free shipping on orders over 100 bucks." -- ThirstyDrunk

"I wanted a shark high on crack dumped into a piranha tank! I wanted college AD's to pull their human faces off, then dive at each other's lizard throats!" -- waahoohah

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q01p7k6T ... e=youtu.be

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Re: Whisky Tops

Post by Savage » Tue Sep 20, 2011 1:43 am

Ya need to gnaw it off with your teeths. Otherwise, how you gonna get your roughage?
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Re: Whisky Tops

Post by DeeboCools » Tue Sep 20, 2011 2:36 pm

lulz. There's no heather flavor to bourbon. Not sure about Crystal Meth tho...
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Jags
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Re: Whisky Tops

Post by Jags » Tue Sep 20, 2011 2:58 pm

Open it with a machete like the champagne sommeliers do. Just be careful of the edges while chugging. You forgot to ask how much is too much in one day.
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Re: Whisky Tops

Post by Jiggers McCoy » Wed Sep 21, 2011 10:17 am

I once sabred a bottle of bubbly with a butter knife. Guess I was too forceful cuz basically the whole neck broke off, not just the part with the cork. My wife was mad, but we still got to drink it.
• "Avoiding the darker alcohols like bourbon, red wine and dark rum might lessen [a hangover] and you might also dance better if you wear a tutu instead of trousers." - FKR

• "If you wanna 'talk about' my drinking, it better be about how fucking awesome it is." - Me

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Re: Whisky Tops

Post by Resident Asshole » Wed Sep 21, 2011 1:43 pm

I suggest melting the top off with hydrochloric acid. This imparts a sweetness which you will not soon forget.
Bourbon is my blood.

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Jags
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Re: Whisky Tops

Post by Jags » Wed Sep 21, 2011 2:15 pm

Resident Asshole wrote:I suggest melting the top off with hydrochloric acid. This imparts a sweetness which you will not soon forget.

Don't be silly! Hydrochloric acid only affects organic material, not glass.
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Re: Whisky Tops

Post by DeeboCools » Wed Sep 21, 2011 5:02 pm

Jags wrote:Don't be silly! Hydrochloric acid only affects organic material, not glass.
Nerds! you guys rule the world! but no the right kind of you...
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Re: Whisky Tops

Post by Wingman » Wed Sep 21, 2011 6:44 pm

Jags wrote: Don't be silly! Hydrochloric acid only affects organic material, not glass.
curse you, glass cork!!!
Stupid should hurt.

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