Known facts about ThirstyDrunk

[Patchez]

Ex clam nation.

*uuurrrp*

You finally move out of Quahog?

[mistah willies]

Ex clam nation.

*uuurrrp*

You finally move out of Quahog?

Stuff is gone. I'm soon to be completely gone. Eyeing the bottom of this bottle, but it's black ink. I'll have to empty it to find the path back to enlightenment, written on the bottom from the inside.

Soon, to grill, to draaaank, and to write in that curious* book of spells/spills, oh mighty Hirsute One. Thanks Oett. Thanks for the spillage and pillage and strange odors emanating from that Drinkominon.



DRINK!




*always drink.


.

[oettinger]

Are you alright?

[oettinger]

I'm soon to be completely bottom of this bottle, but it's empty it find the path back to the bottom.

Soon, l, to draaaank, and to write in spills, oh mighty Oett. Thanks strange odors emanating from that Drinkominon.





.

Ah yeah, you do fine

[mistah willies]

oh mighty Oett. oh mighty Oett. oh mighty Oett. oh mighty Oett. Thanks, strange odors emanating from that Drinkominon.

.

Ah yeah, you do fine

That's what you really wanted, huh big boy

bastard


*hiccup*


.

[waahoohah]

I once saw the inside of Thirsty's Human Organ Cooler.
It was full of iced cans of PBR.
HE CAN TRANSPLANT ONE ANYWHERE.

[oettinger]

He was just another drifter who broke the law!
Trautman: Vagrancy wasn't it? That's gonna look real good on his grave stone in Arlington: Here lies Thirsty, winner of the Congressional Bottle of drunk, survivor of countless benders behind enemy lines. Killed for vagrancy in Jerkwater, USA.
Teasle: Now don't give me any of that crap Trautman. Do you think Thirsty was the only guy who had a tough time at the bar? He drank a gallon of Stroh bullshot for Christ's sake!
Trautman: You're goddamn lucky he didn't drink all of it.

Deputy Lester: I was just drinking with Mitch, and he said that Gault and a couple of the deputies were... a little hard on the pours.
State Police Capt. Dave Kern: Assholes!
Teasle: It doesn't make one goddamn bit of difference, Dave, and you know it! If one of my drunks... gets out of line with a cocktail then the patron comes to me with it. And if I find out it's like he says I kick the bartender's ass! *Me*! The *Law*! People start fucking around with the law then all hell breaks loose! Whatever possessed God in heaven to make a man like Drunko?
Trautman: God didn't mix drink, I made it!

Trautman: I don't think you understand. I didn't come to rescue Thirstiy from you. I came here to rescue the bar from him.
Teasle: Well, we all appreciate your concern Colonel, I will try to be extra careful!
Trautman: I'm just amazed he allowed any of your booze to last
Teasle: Is that right?
Trautman: Strictly speaking, he slipped up. You're lucky to be drinking
Teasle: That's just great. Colonel, you came out here to find out why one of your machines blew a mix!
Trautman: You don't seem to want to accept the fact you're dealing with an expert in guerrilla alcoholism, with a man who's the best, with whisky, with vodka, with bare beer. A man who's been trained to ignore hangovers, ignore weather, to live off empties, to drink things that would make a billy goat puke. In Vietnam his job was to dispose of enemy drink. To drink! Period! Drunk by attrition. Well Thirsty was the best!
Teasle: Are you telling me that 200 of our beer against your boy is a no-drink situation for us?
Trautman: You send that many, don't forget one thing.
Teasle: What?
Trautman: A good supply of empty bags.

[mistah willies]

Thirsty is Rambo?

I did not know this. Damn. You shouldn't have said anything dude. Damn. Nice knowing all of you. Oh shit. me too. nice knowing meself. I posted in here. Damn.

[Patchez]

Find her buddy and make her yours.

[ThirstyDrunk]

Could be worth doubling my PBR budget for awhile.

[NYDingbat]

Could be worth doubling my PBR budget for awhile.

PBR? No Steel Reserve? What's next, Dom Perignon??

[calx]

That fool in the back has a very punchable face.

[ThirstyDrunk]

Calx would punch a guy with glasses

[calx]

I would never hit a guy with glasses. I'd hit em with my fist.

:D

[Badfellow]

Girlfriend? Sister? Or both?