100 Reasons to Hate drinking willies
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Re: 100 Reasons to Hate drinking willies
You, Mr Lester, are an asshole.Jimmy Lester {RIP} wrote: ↑Sat Jul 20, 2019 3:41 pmHe's one of those Indians, right? Yeah, fuck that guy.
Fuck
DRINK!
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Re: 100 Reasons to Hate drinking willies
I come around, he always bummin a Pall Mall.
Cheers
Cheers
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Re: 100 Reasons to Hate drinking willies
Aw, you all make a drunken Injun DRINK.
Hellz yes
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Re: 100 Reasons to Hate drinking willies
This is another drunk ass thread. To be honest with you I don't give a rat's ass what willies does. He's on the other side of the continent. He'd be a great drinking guest for the evening until his wife calls him home.
Found myself in the Matrix and took the red pill. Now I want the blue pill and my bottle and leave me alone.
Re: 100 Reasons to Hate drinking willies
`kay
Meet you on the spiral Lush Man, we build in a NASTY slip`n`slide
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Re: 100 Reasons to Hate drinking willies
Alright I think we're at, or close, to 15. Let me see if I can get us to 20:
His knees bend the wrong way like a cricket's, and when he rubs them together they make the sound of a drunk man snoring.
He still has a 6-pack. ... It traces across the contours of his bulbous beer gut like the knobs on a heirloom tomato
He spent hundreds of dollars on an above-ground bomb shelter with windows.
When he gets out of bed in the morning his joints creak, in unison, to the tune of the Sanford and Son theme song.
His next-day, hangover piss is so strong it crawls out of his body on its elbows and knees, like a soldier trying to avoid trip wires.
His knees bend the wrong way like a cricket's, and when he rubs them together they make the sound of a drunk man snoring.
He still has a 6-pack. ... It traces across the contours of his bulbous beer gut like the knobs on a heirloom tomato
He spent hundreds of dollars on an above-ground bomb shelter with windows.
When he gets out of bed in the morning his joints creak, in unison, to the tune of the Sanford and Son theme song.
His next-day, hangover piss is so strong it crawls out of his body on its elbows and knees, like a soldier trying to avoid trip wires.
"They told me to see the glass half full cause some see it as half empty
I chose to see the glass twice the size it needed to be" - Pharoahe Monch, 'Broken Again'
I chose to see the glass twice the size it needed to be" - Pharoahe Monch, 'Broken Again'
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Re: 100 Reasons to Hate drinking willies
Don't tell me, you are another unemployed comedy writer living in a cheap motel in Burbank? You made me LOL!Rye and Coke wrote: ↑Sat Jul 27, 2019 5:31 pmAlright I think we're at, or close, to 15. Let me see if I can get us to 20:
His knees bend the wrong way like a cricket's, and when he rubs them together they make the sound of a drunk man snoring.
He still has a 6-pack. ... It traces across the contours of his bulbous beer gut like the knobs on a heirloom tomato
He spent hundreds of dollars on an above-ground bomb shelter with windows.
When he gets out of bed in the morning his joints creak, in unison, to the tune of the Sanford and Son theme song.
His next-day, hangover piss is so strong it crawls out of his body on its elbows and knees, like a soldier trying to avoid trip wires.
Found myself in the Matrix and took the red pill. Now I want the blue pill and my bottle and leave me alone.
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Re: 100 Reasons to Hate drinking willies
I just can't believe anyone who can just hoist a jug of Kraken rum over his forearm all nite! This man is crazed like a pirate ghost coming back to haunt the general public or anyone that wants to listen to his insane rants.
Found myself in the Matrix and took the red pill. Now I want the blue pill and my bottle and leave me alone.
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Re: 100 Reasons to Hate drinking willies
all i get is elevator music waiting on the line
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Re: 100 Reasons to Hate drinking willies
And curtains on those windows with the cliché pie cooling on the windowsill.Rye and Coke wrote: ↑Sat Jul 27, 2019 5:31 pm
He spent hundreds of dollars on an above-ground bomb shelter with windows.
Okole maluna!
Re: 100 Reasons to Hate drinking willies
He gurgles his Kraken to get rid of the aftertaste of demon fetuses.
Don't worry. We're in no hurry.
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Re: 100 Reasons to Hate drinking willies
His voice mail box is full and cannot accept drunken harassment at this time. And he smells of elderberries.
ພາສາລາວNONE GENUINE WITHOUT MY SIGNATUREພາສາລາວ
Re: 100 Reasons to Hate drinking willies
Voicemachine? He just mastered his answering intro:
"Hello, Willies`office here, you are talking to Mr. Schmok. Press 1 if you got free Kraken to leave at the doorstep. Press 2 for any complaints that I can`t help you with. Press any other number to fuck yourself. Hold the line and another mod will probably answer your call with more stupid advise.
By hanging up you agree that this call was worth 20 bucks."
"Hello, Willies`office here, you are talking to Mr. Schmok. Press 1 if you got free Kraken to leave at the doorstep. Press 2 for any complaints that I can`t help you with. Press any other number to fuck yourself. Hold the line and another mod will probably answer your call with more stupid advise.
By hanging up you agree that this call was worth 20 bucks."
Drink!
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Re: For drinking willies
At the bottom it says it's perfect for Willies! This is a must for every household.
Okole maluna!