Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

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Artful Drunktective
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Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by Artful Drunktective » Mon May 29, 2017 7:33 pm

Two mice died inside my stove and I'm not sure how. Plus I have 2 cats that didn't kill them first before they became encrusted inside. Annoying!

I have to do restraining orders tomorrow. I wish I could do one against myself against those people so I don't have to.

Oett took the day off today but did not make zucchini.

There is peanut butter and chocolate flavored beer.

Dear Booze did not knock down any aquariums this week.

I learned that circular saws are really annoying.

Some of our fellow male drunkards wore white washed Jordache jeans at one point in time.

Some of our other fellow drunkards (Donald J. Drunk) attempts at being diabolical is just plain adorable.

I have a really mean backhand at throwing vodka bottles in to the garbage can.

I was told to not sing on Skype anymore.

We can all take a collective sigh of relief that nobody got roofied. (Although I'm quasi disappointed).

Thanks to Badfellow, he reminded us that other dear drunkards had a "Summer of Discovery".


--"Happy Memorial Day for my liver"- Badfellow--
Last edited by Artful Drunktective on Tue May 30, 2017 11:01 am, edited 1 time in total.
How can it be so cold in here? It's like Greenland in here. We've got to get some booze. It's the only solution to this intense cold. Something's got to be done. We can't go on like this. - Withnail
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Re: Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by Dear Booze » Mon May 29, 2017 10:39 pm

I worked in the yard until Mrs Booze requested that we go eat Mexican food and drink margaritas.

Went to a pub to watch a baseball game.

Fucked around on Skype.

Was introduced to Du Claw's Sweet Baby Jesus peanut butter and chocolate porter by Patchez.

I did not knock down any aquariums this week.

I learned that circular saws are really annoying.

Learned that Patchez used to be a small Asian man back in the 80s.

Realized that I may have been roofied at some point in my life, but i cant remember for sure.
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a drunk man tortilla chips, Velveeta and a hair dryer and he has nachos.

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Re: Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by Artful Drunktective » Tue May 30, 2017 1:19 pm

Dear Booze wrote:
Mon May 29, 2017 10:39 pm

Learned that Patchez used to be a small Asian man back in the 80s.
HA! Yeah...that was unexpected.
How can it be so cold in here? It's like Greenland in here. We've got to get some booze. It's the only solution to this intense cold. Something's got to be done. We can't go on like this. - Withnail
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Re: Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by Badfellow » Tue May 30, 2017 5:04 pm

In a nutshell, drinking coffee with rum and watching classic prank calls to shitty public access shows is a great way to start your day.
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Re: Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by Badfellow » Thu Jun 01, 2017 3:25 pm

Yesterday in a nutshell:

Got another 160 plants in the ground, mostly heirloom tomatoes and freaky-assed spicy peppers. Set up another sector of irrigation system and a hundred more feet of fence.

Found a putter in the middle of the county road. Not a Titleist. But good enough for the upcoming neighborhood mini golf crawl of death.

Drank three Long Islands and a Makers double with my rib basket dinner. Had about the same for dessert.
ພາສາລາວNONE GENUINE WITHOUT MY SIGNATUREພາສາລາວ

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Re: Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by Dear Booze » Thu Jun 01, 2017 5:12 pm

5:00 A.M.: Awake, out of bed.
6:30 A.M.: Meeting
8:00 A.M.: Meeting
10:00 A.M.: Meeting
10:30 A.M.: Meeting
11:00 A.M.: Meeting
11:30 A.M.: Meeting
Noon: Lunch
1:00 P.M.: Meeting
2:00 P.M.: Meeting
3:00 P.M.: Meeting was canceled. Got a haircut instead.
4:30 P.M.: Meeting
5:30 P.M.: Home
6:30 P.M.: Meeting
8:00 P.M.: My weekend starts
8:00 P.M.: Drink
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a drunk man tortilla chips, Velveeta and a hair dryer and he has nachos.

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Re: Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by Artful Drunktective » Thu Jun 01, 2017 8:59 pm

Dear Booze wrote:
Thu Jun 01, 2017 5:12 pm
5:00 A.M.: Awake, out of bed.
6:30 A.M.: Meeting
8:00 A.M.: Meeting
10:00 A.M.: Meeting
10:30 A.M.: Meeting
11:00 A.M.: Meeting
11:30 A.M.: Meeting
Noon: Lunch
1:00 P.M.: Meeting
2:00 P.M.: Meeting
3:00 P.M.: Meeting was canceled. Got a haircut instead.
4:30 P.M.: Meeting
5:30 P.M.: Home
6:30 P.M.: Meeting
8:00 P.M.: My weekend starts
8:00 P.M.: Drink
So was this yesterday because if it's today, according to the time stamp, that means you were writing this during a meeting.
How can it be so cold in here? It's like Greenland in here. We've got to get some booze. It's the only solution to this intense cold. Something's got to be done. We can't go on like this. - Withnail
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Re: Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by Dear Booze » Thu Jun 01, 2017 9:11 pm

Artful Detective wrote:
Thu Jun 01, 2017 8:59 pm
Dear Booze wrote:
Thu Jun 01, 2017 5:12 pm
5:00 A.M.: Awake, out of bed.
6:30 A.M.: Meeting
8:00 A.M.: Meeting
10:00 A.M.: Meeting
10:30 A.M.: Meeting
11:00 A.M.: Meeting
11:30 A.M.: Meeting
Noon: Lunch
1:00 P.M.: Meeting
2:00 P.M.: Meeting
3:00 P.M.: Meeting was canceled. Got a haircut instead.
4:30 P.M.: Meeting
5:30 P.M.: Home
6:30 P.M.: Meeting
8:00 P.M.: My weekend starts
8:00 P.M.: Drink
So was this yesterday because if it's today, according to the time stamp, that means you were writing this during a meeting.
You are correct. It is now 8:10 P.M. and I am right on schedule. And I have a fresh haircut.
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a drunk man tortilla chips, Velveeta and a hair dryer and he has nachos.

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Re: Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by Artful Drunktective » Thu Jun 01, 2017 9:48 pm

Dear Booze wrote:
Thu Jun 01, 2017 9:11 pm
Artful Detective wrote:
Thu Jun 01, 2017 8:59 pm
Dear Booze wrote:
Thu Jun 01, 2017 5:12 pm
5:00 A.M.: Awake, out of bed.
6:30 A.M.: Meeting
8:00 A.M.: Meeting
10:00 A.M.: Meeting
10:30 A.M.: Meeting
11:00 A.M.: Meeting
11:30 A.M.: Meeting
Noon: Lunch
1:00 P.M.: Meeting
2:00 P.M.: Meeting
3:00 P.M.: Meeting was canceled. Got a haircut instead.
4:30 P.M.: Meeting
5:30 P.M.: Home
6:30 P.M.: Meeting
8:00 P.M.: My weekend starts
8:00 P.M.: Drink
So was this yesterday because if it's today, according to the time stamp, that means you were writing this during a meeting.
You are correct. It is now 8:10 P.M. and I am right on schedule. And I have a fresh haircut.
You mean bikini wax.
How can it be so cold in here? It's like Greenland in here. We've got to get some booze. It's the only solution to this intense cold. Something's got to be done. We can't go on like this. - Withnail
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Re: Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by Dear Booze » Thu Jun 01, 2017 10:33 pm

Artful Detective wrote:
Thu Jun 01, 2017 9:48 pm
Dear Booze wrote:
Thu Jun 01, 2017 9:11 pm
Artful Detective wrote:
Thu Jun 01, 2017 8:59 pm


So was this yesterday because if it's today, according to the time stamp, that means you were writing this during a meeting.
You are correct. It is now 8:10 P.M. and I am right on schedule. And I have a fresh haircut.
You mean bikini wax.
Yes, I went to Sao Paulo's Cortes de Cabelo e Muito Mais. I had to pay extra dinheiro for the Muito Mais. Smooth as seda.
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a drunk man tortilla chips, Velveeta and a hair dryer and he has nachos.

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Re: Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by Artful Drunktective » Thu Jun 01, 2017 11:01 pm


12:30 AM: Stumbled home from a friend’s house...slithered into bed, hoping I got roofied.
2:30 AM: Awake, looking at the clock with one blood shot eye open, tossing and turning.
4:45 AM: Awake, looking at the clock with one blood shot eye open, tossing and turning.
6:00 AM: Dragged ass out of bed.
6:02 AM: Attempted to shower off the booze smell.
6:15 AM: Unlike Oett, I did change my underwear and brush my teeth.
7:00 AM: Went to office #1 to do stupid officey type stuff like my “business papers”.
9:00 AM: Went to office #2 to feed the fish for the weekend. Did not accidentally knock the aquarium over but alas I think all the fish finally croaked but fed them anyway... just in case.
9:15 AM: Went back to first office to assist angry clients, wishing I brought Valium- for me, not them.
11:00 AM: Had a staff meeting with the “Krauts” (cuz they aren't really German) from the league office that were in town visiting to make sure we aren’t fucking shit up.
12:30 PM: Went to lunch with said Krauts. (I got chicken katsu).
1:30 PM: While they were training my staff, I went back to office #1 to help different but hysterical clients. Wishing I brought Xanax…for me.
3:15 PM: Went to the store to buy booze.
3:30 PM: Took Krauts out so they could get “iced coffee”, blasting really loud bassy music in my car on the drive. (I got a Chai iced tea).
4:30 PM: Drove Krauts to the airport and didn’t slow down my car as I dropped them off. They had to drop out and roll.
5:00 PM: Came home and for a minute, contemplated crying for 5 minutes over the stress of my day.
5:06 PM: Made a drink as my weekend begins. (Thank you overtime for your long weekends. Hard work does sometimes pay off).
How can it be so cold in here? It's like Greenland in here. We've got to get some booze. It's the only solution to this intense cold. Something's got to be done. We can't go on like this. - Withnail
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Re: Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by oettinger » Fri Jun 02, 2017 7:22 am

Woke up
Went out, noticed it`s too hot outside for work
Went home immediately, started drining
Got a call from the floor-tiler. One box of tiles apparently doesn`t macht the other. Could I come over and buy a fitting box? Ha no. I`m drunk already dumbass
I just really like the taste of alcohol
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Re: Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by ThirstyDrunk » Fri Jun 02, 2017 12:19 pm

Breakfast with Pabst, eggs, and corned beef hash.
Yardwork with Pabst.
Lunch with Pabst and Old Grand-Dad.
Dinner plans with a pizza delivery and George Remus (king of the Cincinnati bootleggers) Rye. And Pabst.
Finish off the evening with Pabst, George Remus, and friends with a big ass bonfire in the freshly mowed backyard, or "garden" as Mr. Boozificator calls it.
Also dogs, lots of doggies attending.
Passs out in the yard or in drunkard chat whichever comes first.
try it

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Re: Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by Artful Drunktective » Fri Jun 02, 2017 11:31 pm

ThirstyDrunk wrote:
Fri Jun 02, 2017 12:19 pm
Breakfast with Pabst, eggs, and corned beef hash.
Yardwork with Pabst.
Lunch with Pabst and Old Grand-Dad.
Dinner plans with a pizza delivery and George Remus (king of the Cincinnati bootleggers) Rye. And Pabst.
Finish off the evening with Pabst, George Remus, and friends with a big ass bonfire in the freshly mowed backyard, or "garden" as Mr. Boozificator calls it.
Also dogs, lots of doggies attending.
Passs out in the yard or in drunkard chat whichever comes first.
That sounds like a perfect day. Thank you for sharing. :D

You should add Pabst into the Shit we love thread since you evidently love it.
How can it be so cold in here? It's like Greenland in here. We've got to get some booze. It's the only solution to this intense cold. Something's got to be done. We can't go on like this. - Withnail
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Re: Your day in a nutshell. Share please.

Post by ThirstyDrunk » Sat Jun 03, 2017 12:58 am

Why is Pabst not already in the shit we love thread?
Are you all fuckin sissies?
try it

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