The ways of Artful living

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Badfellow
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The ways of Artful living

Post by Badfellow » Fri Feb 09, 2018 11:02 am

Yes, The Artful Drunktective.

Some call her the stylish, Snoop Doggless Martha Stewart of modern drunken living. Others just call her a nerd. She is also known to refer to herself in the third person as Queen Wolfschmidt...

"Ah, I believe Queen Wolfschmidt will mix herself another drink. Her highness commands that Sir James Horton go to the store and procureth more vodka."

Yes, and she can sing a mean Guns N' Roses on the karaoke machine. She even does the microphone swing. Construction workers at the bar throw their underwear up on stage when she's done.

Don't we all have something to share regarding this wonderful and multi faceted fellow Drunkard?
ພາສາລາວNONE GENUINE WITHOUT MY SIGNATUREພາສາລາວ

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Re: The ways of Artful living

Post by Artful Drunktective » Fri Feb 09, 2018 11:08 am

You are such a dickweed BF. You know I can delete this right? Dweeb.
Something's got to be done. We can't go on like this.
I must have some booze. I demand to have some booze!- Withnail


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Re: The ways of Artful living

Post by Badfellow » Fri Feb 09, 2018 11:12 am

Artful Drunktective wrote:
Fri Feb 09, 2018 11:08 am
What a totally awesome post BF. You're the best!
Many thanks, AD. You can look forward to many more totally awesome posts in the future.
ພາສາລາວNONE GENUINE WITHOUT MY SIGNATUREພາສາລາວ

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Re: The ways of Artful living

Post by Artful Drunktective » Fri Feb 09, 2018 11:15 am

Badfellow wrote:
Fri Feb 09, 2018 11:12 am
Artful Drunktective wrote:
Fri Feb 09, 2018 11:08 am
What a totally awesome post BF. You're the best!
Many thanks for sending those gay male revue strippers over to my trailer last night, AD. You can look forward to many more totally awesome blow job posts in the future.
Indeed I will, BF, indeed I will enjoy seeing more blow jobs posts from you from gay strippers. Now go drink your Caramel Vanilla Cuppa Cake® Tea and spill it on your crotch! But please...lift the afghan covering it up first before you do.

You will rue the day, sir!
Something's got to be done. We can't go on like this.
I must have some booze. I demand to have some booze!- Withnail


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Re: The ways of Artful living

Post by Badfellow » Fri Feb 09, 2018 11:50 am

Rue the day?

Awwwwwwwwww, that's adorable.
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Re: The ways of Artful living

Post by Dear Booze » Fri Feb 09, 2018 7:27 pm

She loves to use the term "roundhouse kick" and routinely threatens to do it. However, she has no idea what it is, how to do it, or what it is used for.
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a drunk man tortilla chips, Velveeta and a hair dryer and he has nachos.

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Re: The ways of Artful living

Post by Artful Drunktective » Fri Feb 09, 2018 7:51 pm

Meet me at The Hole and I will show you. Kick your ass right through that cheesy saloon doors in the entrance.
Something's got to be done. We can't go on like this.
I must have some booze. I demand to have some booze!- Withnail


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Re: The ways of Artful living

Post by Dear Booze » Fri Feb 09, 2018 9:23 pm

I see how this is going to go. We roast AD, and she makes stupid comments after each post.

I'm out.
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a drunk man tortilla chips, Velveeta and a hair dryer and he has nachos.

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Re: The ways of Artful living

Post by ThirstyDrunk » Fri Feb 09, 2018 11:09 pm

She keeps Moet & Chandon in her pretty cabinet.
To be fair, I'm drunker than you.

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Re: The ways of Artful living

Post by Artful Drunktective » Fri Feb 09, 2018 11:40 pm

Dear Booze wrote:
Fri Feb 09, 2018 9:23 pm
I see how this is going to go. We roast AD, and she makes stupid comments after each post.

I'm out.
Yeah yeah I will because there is no other choice instead of going and crying in the girls bathroom like you, DB. I do believe there is a Tampax machine in there...do you need some change? Unlike you...I didn't ask for this because I know exactly how it will go down.

Why don't you go back to the Hole and find a sleazy hooker like you always do? We will still be your alibi and we won't tell the Chamber of Commerce committee.
Something's got to be done. We can't go on like this.
I must have some booze. I demand to have some booze!- Withnail


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Re: The ways of Artful living

Post by Artful Drunktective » Sat Feb 10, 2018 12:00 am

ThurstonDrunk wrote:
Fri Feb 09, 2018 11:09 pm
She keeps Moet & Chandon in her pretty cabinet.
Shhhh Thirsty! Don't tell everyone but yes I do! I love the champers. I was known as the female Continental back in the day. Roofies and Viagara laced champagnya is how I lured men into my lair. Only way I can get a date!

But what else is in my pretty cabinet. Hmmm.....? I'm intrigued....


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Something's got to be done. We can't go on like this.
I must have some booze. I demand to have some booze!- Withnail


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Re: The ways of Artful living

Post by Patchez » Sat Feb 10, 2018 2:30 am

Artful Drunktective wrote:
Sat Feb 10, 2018 12:00 am
ThurstonDrunk wrote:
Fri Feb 09, 2018 11:09 pm
She keeps Moet & Chandon in her pretty cabinet.
Shhhh Thirsty! Don't tell everyone but yes I do! I love the champers. I was known as the female Continental back in the day. Roofies and Viagara laced champagnya is how I lured men into my lair. Only way I can get a date!

But what else is in my pretty cabinet. Hmmm.....? I'm intrigued....


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Wolffschmitt Vodka. some dog food for Foxy. Maybe a a little Maui Wowie!
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Re: The ways of Artful living

Post by oettinger » Sat Feb 10, 2018 9:35 am

Best thread of the weekend so far, will read again

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Is it just me or did the boxed bumwine cork a little bit?
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Re: The ways of Artful living

Post by Badfellow » Sat Feb 10, 2018 9:52 am

Dear Booze wrote:
Fri Feb 09, 2018 7:27 pm
She loves to use the term "roundhouse kick" and routinely threatens to do it. However, she has no idea what it is, how to do it, or what it is used for.
Not true! She writes a monthly advice column for Ladies Roundhouse Kick Journal.
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Re: The ways of Artful living

Post by mistah willies » Sat Feb 10, 2018 5:05 pm

She's a lovely intoxication.

A tincture, a mixture of Badassery, high intelligence, and quick wit.

We do well to speak with the likes of this one.

Now don't say anything about this song, because I hail from them dammed 80's and I cannot be helped.

You magnificent bastards.

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