Merry Christmas you drunks!

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RIPT2.0
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by RIPT2.0 »

Merry Christmas drunkards! I wish I could start drinking right now but I have to drive my Sister to my Parent's house. Sometimes life is not fair!

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Bubblez
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by Bubblez »

Merry Christmas all sitting here with mead from a local chap and some new Drunkard Gear that suprise to me got here before the holiday
What would you rather do—leave a beautiful corpse, or a scorched Earth? Don’t live fast and die young. Live long and die hard.¸

—Sarah Szabo

I'm all for a scorched Earth policy. -- Me

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Lush City
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by Lush City »

Savage wrote:
Sun Dec 22, 2019 1:48 am
Lush City wrote:
Sun Dec 22, 2019 12:53 am
Let the joy overwhelm you. I remember in Catholic elementary school a nun just mentioned it was good to experience every Christmas as if it were your last. That really stuck with me an 8 year old at the time. Now go and deck those halls!
Ooh, those penguins can fuck with your head. I remember the weekly speeches about "finding your vocation." Geez, we were seven or eight years old. How the hell were we supposed to decide on a life of service to God when we just little kids? Thankfully, a lot of that time is blanked out for me, due to age and booze and coma.
Catholic girls were always the best. Some really made the boys chase them and others were just easy to love. But, some didn't like me. They all had standards.
Found myself in the Matrix and took the red pill. Now I want the blue pill and my bottle and leave me alone.
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Nausea
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by Nausea »

Bubblez wrote:
Wed Dec 25, 2019 3:20 pm
Merry Christmas all sitting here with mead from a local chap and some new Drunkard Gear that suprise to me got here before the holiday
New drunkard gear? I'm totally jealous.

I've been meaning to order one of those Tiger Whiskey shirts. Hilarious.

The cool tie-dye one is out of my size though.
Oh God, my grandmother would kill me.

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Bubblez
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by Bubblez »

Nausea wrote:
Wed Dec 25, 2019 11:14 pm
Bubblez wrote:
Wed Dec 25, 2019 3:20 pm
Merry Christmas all sitting here with mead from a local chap and some new Drunkard Gear that suprise to me got here before the holiday
New drunkard gear? I'm totally jealous.

I've been meaning to order one of those Tiger Whiskey shirts. Hilarious.

The cool tie-dye one is out of my size though.
Got Booze 2020 and Whiskey Rebel seeing as how it was PA that had the troops called on us
What would you rather do—leave a beautiful corpse, or a scorched Earth? Don’t live fast and die young. Live long and die hard.¸

—Sarah Szabo

I'm all for a scorched Earth policy. -- Me

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Rye and Coke
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by Rye and Coke »

I want to go out and shop for gifts


but I started drinking this morning and haven't stopped....


it's a goddamn conundrum
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"Oh, I'd'a had religion, Lord, this very day
But the womens and whiskey, well, they would not let me pray" - Son House

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Rye and Coke
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by Rye and Coke »

The bar down the street has decided to start doing carryout cocktails. Think I'm about to get me a mobile Long Island Iced Tea
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"Oh, I'd'a had religion, Lord, this very day
But the womens and whiskey, well, they would not let me pray" - Son House

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scream ale
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by scream ale »

I'm not much for Christmas but it gives me a short day tomorrow. Noon at the absolute latest. Then nothing to do Friday-Sunday but enjoy myself. I can live with that.
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Dear Booze
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by Dear Booze »

Here comes Rum and Coke, here comes Rum and Coke, right down Rum and Coke Lane

Glasses and Ice cubes and little stir straws, we don't need champagne

Bells are ringing, drunkards singing, all is merry and bright

So bring you money and forget your cares, 'cause Rum and Coke comes tonight.
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a drunk man tortilla chips, Velveeta and a hair dryer and he has nachos.

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Dear Booze
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by Dear Booze »

One the first day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me a ride home in a taxi.

One the second day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me two rum and cokes and a ride home in a taxi.

One the third day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me three gin and tonics, two rum and cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the fourth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum and cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the fifth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the sixth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the seventh day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the eighth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the ninth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, nine fake phone numbers, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the tenth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, ten stale peanuts, nine fake phone numbers, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi

On the eleventh day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, eleven purple hooters, ten stale peanuts, nine fake phone numbers, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, twelve bottles of Guinness, eleven purple hooters, ten stale peanuts, nine fake phone numbers, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a drunk man tortilla chips, Velveeta and a hair dryer and he has nachos.

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Rye and Coke
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by Rye and Coke »

Dear Booze wrote:
Thu Dec 24, 2020 10:00 am
One the first day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me a ride home in a taxi.

One the second day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me two rum and cokes and a ride home in a taxi.

One the third day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me three gin and tonics, two rum and cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the fourth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum and cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the fifth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the sixth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the seventh day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the eighth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the ninth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, nine fake phone numbers, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the tenth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, ten stale peanuts, nine fake phone numbers, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi

On the eleventh day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, eleven purple hooters, ten stale peanuts, nine fake phone numbers, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, twelve bottles of Guinness, eleven purple hooters, ten stale peanuts, nine fake phone numbers, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

goddamn genius
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"Oh, I'd'a had religion, Lord, this very day
But the womens and whiskey, well, they would not let me pray" - Son House

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benitobeast69
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by benitobeast69 »

merry fuckin xmas you cock wobbles x
Hangover cure: Rigorous sex, hydration, hot bath, then "go up for half an hour in an open aeroplane. (needless to say, with a non-hungover person at the controls)." - Kinglsey Amis

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Dear Booze
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by Dear Booze »

Oh liquor store of Dur-an-go you're open through the night.

Now I'll keep on drinking up through the morning light.
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a drunk man tortilla chips, Velveeta and a hair dryer and he has nachos.

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Lush City
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by Lush City »

Here's a merry Christmas video from an old board friend, Steve Jessup.
Christmas Blowout Special - Decorating My Tree with Guns!
https://youtu.be/Su9oOeUY8js
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Found myself in the Matrix and took the red pill. Now I want the blue pill and my bottle and leave me alone.
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Lush City
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Re: Merry Christmas you drunks!

Post by Lush City »

Rye and Coke wrote:
Thu Dec 24, 2020 1:09 pm
Dear Booze wrote:
Thu Dec 24, 2020 10:00 am
One the first day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me a ride home in a taxi.

One the second day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me two rum and cokes and a ride home in a taxi.

One the third day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me three gin and tonics, two rum and cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the fourth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum and cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the fifth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the sixth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the seventh day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the eighth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the ninth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, nine fake phone numbers, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS!... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

On the tenth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, ten stale peanuts, nine fake phone numbers, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi

On the eleventh day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, eleven purple hooters, ten stale peanuts, nine fake phone numbers, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my barkeep gave to me, twelve bottles of Guinness, eleven purple hooters, ten stale peanuts, nine fake phone numbers, eight kamikazes, seven awkward dance moves, six margaritas, FIVE JÄGER BOMBS... four scotch & sodas, three gin & tonics, two rum & cokes, and a ride home in a taxi.

goddamn genius
He only had to know 11 drinks and a ride home in a taxi. The formula was already there. I just wonder how many of those drinks Dear Booze has consumed himself? Let's be authentic for once.
Found myself in the Matrix and took the red pill. Now I want the blue pill and my bottle and leave me alone.
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