Night Owl? Sleepless? Insomniac? Post here!

[Lush City]

I am twitchy as a cat right now. I can't get back to sleep since Grumpy left for work at 3:40. I'm working on some ideas for some more stories, and doing some online shopping but both of those things can lead to a bad end when done after hours.I remember one MD member that once bought a bunch of bug candy late at night. And many people recall those unfortunate late night phone calls.

What are you all doing?

I'm probably going to sleep very shortly judging from my last beer and tequila shot. It's going to be a meltdown!

[Dirty Diamond Lou]

It's when the lightest hint of daylight begins to stream through the gaps of of your curtains that the folly of pushing though the witchiest of hours begins to take hold. It heralds the day's ascent into real life. We can't ignore the fact that when we do this, the scraping on the inside of your skin makes you feel alive. It lets you know that something is there.

[mistah willies]

It's when the lightest hint of daylight begins to stream through the gaps of of your curtains that the folly of pushing though the witchiest of hours begins to take hold. It heralds the day's ascent into real life. We can't ignore the fact that when we do this, the scraping on the inside of your skin makes you feel alive. It lets you know that something is there.

That there is a lovely literature tone-poem. Well done, young man!

[Savage]

Did any of you ever play the Stump Amazon game? You think of something, and type it in, and see what comes up. Well, tonight, I was yakking on the phone with one of my daughters, and Grumpy was snoring away in his comfy chair, and I came up with: Monkey Snot. Eeewww, right? But, lo and behold, Amazon delivered. Almost.

Gorilla Snot. Apparently, it is some kind of hair gel. Hair gel? Geez, are we still back in the eighties? Maybe if I want to join a hair band.

So yuck, and I then tried a general googling. Pinky swear, there is a drink, or rather, quite a few diverse drinks, that go by the name of Gorilla Snot. (Why no Monkey Snot? I dunno.) Anyway, one of the drinks consists of Midori, Creme de Banana, and yellow Advokat. Eeewww redux? Apparently, when you pour these, a viscous liquor forms a wad of a snot-like consistency--as if someone had snotted into your glass 'o booze. Charming.

Why am I up this late/early? Well, Grumpy finally toddled off to bed, and commenced snoring like a freight train. Did you know that the strongest earplugs only block up to 33 decibels? or something like that. Whatever, the old cartoon trope of a saw cutting through logs was right on target.
Many years ago, when my youngest was in high school, we recorded Grumpy's downstairs comfy chair snoring on a cheap Walmart old fashioned tape recorder. Then we recorded him when he stumbled upstairs to bed. Then, the next day, we played the cassette for him. He actually denied ever making such an unholy racket! He accused up of faking the tape!

So, there is no hope. I am here in my little one story retirement cottage, knowing that if I do not go back to bed, that I will not be worth a damn tomorrow (erm, today). Eh, forget about it. Maybe I should just pour another.

[oettinger]

First result on youtube

[Savage]

Well, Grumpy just peeled his sweaty butt out of the comfy chair, and fell into bed. No more stairs; the bedroom is right off the main room, so he didn't hurt himself or break anything. Yay! I'm going to stuff the earplugs in, throw on the eyeshade (still no curtain rods, so just blinds) and try to get some sleep. That youtube is himself on a quiet night. On a bad night, we used to hear him when we were downstairs, playing scrabble and laughing and talking. One time, as I lay in bed beside the snore machine, I heard a noise outside. I heard a man say, "Damn!" I looked out the window, and saw the neighbor two doors away, staring up at our window with his fists on his hips, shaking his head. I opened the window, and said, "Tell me about it."

[oettinger]

For earplugs use cigarette butts. They work.

I had a friend that snored like a horse. It was very bad. One time I threw a party and he passed out badly. You could hear him from two stories below. He woke up my parents doing that. Another friend went upstairs to grab some CDs from my room and thought someone was having sex in there.
To make matters worse, that guy used to piss himself all the time when drunk.

[Rye and Coke]

I feel EXTREMELY self conscious about snoring now..

[Dirty Diamond Lou]

I Amazon searched "the gobbler". To me, that's when you sneak up behind a buddy on the patio at the bar and in front of everybody, you slip your hand between his legs, raise your arm up into a cobra-like strike position while simultaneously wharbling "gobble gobble gobble".

The Amazon search yielded mixed results. A drain cleaner solution of some sort was the primary find.

[Savage]

Dear God, what the fuck?

[RIPT2.0]

A few years back I went to visit a friend of mine in TN. He complained bitterly about my snoring and told me I kept him up all night. On another occasion I was at my Buddies hunting camp for the weekend. One of the guys staying with us got up in the middle of the night and went home because he said I was snoring and talking in my sleep so loudly that he couldn't sleep. He said he would never spend another night at hunting camp if I was going to be there, which suited me fine because the guy is a major asshole, so I guess there's a silver lining to everything.

[Savage]

Part of the reason I don't sleep is, on account of he falls asleep/passes out in his chair and I have to keep checking to make sure he is still breathing. But put him in bed and the snore machine fires up. The navy meds gave him a CPAP machine but it made more noise than he did, plus, when he was deep asleep and snoring the damn alarm would go off and himself would lurch semi-awake, gasping for breath, totally disoriented, and WTF? The treatment was worse than the thing it was supposed to be helping

[Badfellow]

Morpheus betrays us all eventually.