Thompson’s Theories of Diet and Health

[oettinger]

I lost track, did we all fall asleep on the wheel? Who is even able to read google maps nowadays... we`re fucked

[Thompson]

I lost track, did we all fall asleep on the wheel? Who is even able to read google maps nowadays... we`re fucked

Yes, we are all fucked Oetts. Fucked we all are. This particular piece of history takes place before google maps and smart ass phones. This is when you had to have the proper coins for the telephone booth. And the Dr. Pepper machine. You couldn’t just swipe some card. I did admire the older ladies who had their checks already made out and they just had to write in the amount. I had a bunch of crumpled dollar bills with gravy stains that I pulled out. I could tell my breath was bad. The clerk would shrink away even if I didn’t say anything. But those days are gone Oetts. That is why we are going to heist the shit out of Alaska, and then go to them other places you said, and heist them.

[Thompson]

So get your fat ass up here, Oetts. The headquarters is perfect. You have to walk up some stairs but that will be good for your cardiovascular system. Call from the Frozen Lips bowling lanes and the girls will come fetch ya.

[Thompson]

Everybody is so friendly, said Badfellow, here in Frozen Lips. Down to earth they are. I don’t want to heist anything from Frozen Lips.

I agree, said Thompson, I was thinking the same thing myself. I was also thinking we should be staking out other opportunities, and we can do that on the Harley then retreat back here for supper.

Right. Grab me a beer while you’re up, will ya?

Sure.

[oettinger]

So get your fat ass up here, Oetts. The headquarters is perfect. You have to walk up some stairs but that will be good for your cardiovascular system. Call from the Frozen Lips bowling lanes and the girls will come fetch ya.

I`m wating in the office already, you must have mistaken me with my doppelgänger named drunksquatch. He`s some monkey type man that really only share`s my scent that drives grizzlies and hockers nuts

[Thompson]

The girls are on the way. You are just in time for supper, said Thompson.

Ladybug wasn’t talking to Thompson, and he was thanking God for that. Good Christ she could cook. She had some kind of red sauce simmering in this huge pot where she put all these things like onions, celery, and bell peppers, I think they are called, there are different color bell peppers. I’m not sure why they call them bell peppers, said Thompson to himself, but everybody seems to know what a bell pepper looks like.

The girls came back with Oettinger, who was huffing and puffing from climbing the stairs. But he was smiling big. Gee wiz, Bug, we could smell that sauce two blocks away!

Thanks Oetts. You all sit down at the table. It won’t be long.

Thompson was the last person served. In fact, Bug served herself before she put his bowl down.

Goddamn it! You did this on purpose, you served mine cold on purpose!

It’s not cold, it’s room temperature.

In Alaska room temperature is cold. Listen here, Ladybug, we are an elite band of outlaws. We live by no man’s code. Our planning and execution is very good. I’m not going to eat room temperature food, and you know that, so you pulled this shit on purpose!

Nobody else is complaining, said Bug.

Thompson looked around and everybody else was digging into their bowl, blowing on every bite it was so hot.

Okay, fine! he said to himself.

[Thompson]

After a full day of stake out duty Badfellow said to Thompson, We should head back now. Bug is making veal chops.

Just drop me off at the Pitt Grill, said Thompson. I’ll find a cheap motel and meet you back here tomorrow.

[Thompson]

Thompson got a room at the Boxcar Motel and swimming pool. Boxcar was the name of the town.

It’s really cold in my room, complained Thompson, I can see my breath.

There is no swimming allowed in the pool, said the desk clerk. If it’s cold in your room it’s because it’s cold in Alaska.

I don’t suppose you have another room.

No.

Badfellow drove the Harley into Boxcar and looked around for Thompson. He went to the Pitt Grill and then went to the Boxcar motel and swimming pool. He rang the bell they always have at the front desk and some thug looking guy came out the back room.

I’m looking for Thompson, said Badfellow. Skinny old guy, walks with a cane. The waitress at Pitt Grill said he checked in here.

Oh yeah, I remember him. He was a complainer. See that X mark in our reservation book? That means he’s a complainer.

What room is he in?

Oh, he checked out. He was saying something about train stations when he left. Friend of yours? We don’t have a train station in Boxcar.

Well friend, said Badfellow without sound, There’s gonna be plenty other shit you don’t have in Boxcar.

[Thompson]

Badfellow went motoring around. No sign of Thompson. Then he saw this ugly looking stick thing on the side of the road. Had hair on it. Oh, that’s him, said Badfellow.

Thompson! He yelled. Are you dead? You look dead.

No reply.

Badfellow bent down to feel for a pulse, and that breath nearly made him see double. Thompson wasn’t dead. But there was no way he was doing any mouth to mouth resuscitation. He dragged Thompson to a tree and then strung him up by his feet so all his blood would go to his head. He studied the head and saw some blood coming out the nose. He unstrung him and layed him on the ground and kicked him hard in the belly.

Thompson, can you hear me?

Only slightly, said Thompson.

Do you feel a bit better?

A bit.

Can you climb up onto the back of the Harley?

I think so. I’ll try. Thanks for rescuing me Badfellow.

[Hugh]

https://rumble.com/v4o60v9-north-to-alaska.html

[Thompson]

Badfellow made it back to Frozen Lips and got Thompson off the Harley. He picked the featherweight up onto his shoulders and carried him up the stairs to the flat. He tucked him under his rug. Ladybug came out of the kitchen and Badfellow gave her the stare. He said nothing. He stared a while longer then turned around and left. He rode back to Boxcar to the motel and swimming pool. Mob connections, he thought. Lots of money in there. Drugs, no doubt, prostitution, money laundering, numbers racket. Probably had a huge safe in the office. Oetts could crack it I’ll bet, Badfellow said to himself, and I’d like to mix it up some with that thug behind the desk. He smiled at that thought then wrote some things down on his note pad. He settled in for another day of surveillance.

[Thompson]

Thompson coughed up a big glob of gunk and immediately sat up. He did not want to drown like Jimi Hendrix. He liked that song Red House, and would hum it when he was alone.

My fucking lungs are failing, he said out loud to the ceiling , and found a cup to spit the gunk out in. Then he coughed some more and then lit a cigarette.

[Thompson]

Bug sent Dix to the grocery to get three bags of lentils. I’ll make a big pot, she said. Better pick up some more olive oil and a couple French breads, and some more butter.

What about Thompson, said Dix?

That’s who the lentils are for. Just leave that to me. Hurry up, the lentils have to soak and then there’s the cooking time, I don’t want Thompson to die on my watch.

We get to have some lentils too, right, said Dix?

Of course, in fact, get one of those family packs of pork chops. Get the breakfast cut pork chops, not those big thick tough ones.

[Thompson]

https://rumble.com/v4o60v9-north-to-alaska.html

The video is not found, Hugh. Where is it?

[Thompson]

Thompson heard the knock at the door and knew in his lizard brain it was the cops. It was the downstairs door so they couldn’t just bust in. Girls, said Thompson, go on down there and do your stuff. Bug, you stay up here. Hugh, you go over to the table and pretend to be drawing a picture. Put the tv on in there. I will pretend to be dead, and the cops will come over to have a look see. Then I will moan and roll over and cut a fart. They are most likely not from robbery but domestic disputes. Lots of those I would think in Alaska. Bug, you be ready to cut in and do that wringing of your hands on your apron thing.

But the Eskimo stripper girls handled everything expertly. No questions asked, except phone numbers and Are you married? The girls said they bowl most everyday at the Frozen Lips bowling lanes as part of their workout regimen. That picture was immediately etched in both cops’ brains. It became part of the collective unconscious