The Woodpile

[Oggar]

I just saw Rowdy's post in the other forum so here it is for all those who haven't heard it yet.

Back about six or seven years ago I was drinki9ng at a party. It was early summer. I was in the basement drinking with the rugby team. Back then they were always inviting me to parties because they wanted me to play for them. Plus the first time I partied with them I put down their chugging, head-butting and drinking champions respectively. I'm not sure exactly what happened that night... I know there was keg beer and I split a bottle of Jag with one of the old props before the Goldschlagger onslaught. The next morning I was awakened by an odd sensation it felt like something wet tugging on my arm. As my eyes opened to a bluing darkness I suddenly felt very uncomfortable. I looked to my left and saw flaking baby blue paint. Huh? To my right where the strange wet, tugging sensation was coming from a small brown and white dog was licking my arm. I groaned and it hopped backward before resuming it's previous course of action. Infront of me was a large gray duplex... "Oh wow, that's my house," I thought to myself. "I almost made it," I thought optimistically. I once again looked at the dog. "He's not on a leash... I hope the neighbor's didn't see me," I thought and half-way said outloud to myself. I rolled off the grossly uncomfortable woodpile onto the ground bringing a couple pieces of wood along with me. I pushed myself upright and staggered to my front door. It was good to be home, a cheap matress never felt so good.

A few weeks later I awakened under similar circumstances. The same dog was there this time pawwing noisily at some sort of hard blue plastic.... "Crap! It's a kiddie pool!" I pushed it off of me as quietly as you can do something like that at 6am, trying to slink away unnoticed. No such luck! This time I clearly saw the neighbor kid standing at the screen door watching his/her tiny friendly dog now taking a pee mere inches from the spot I'd been resting my head. I sheepishly waved and staggered out of their backyard to the other side of my house. Hopefully entering my front door unseen. I'd like to say alot has changed since then but that'd be a lie. Now I live two blocks closer to the bar and all my neighbors have is a parking lot which (thankfullly) is less comfortable than a woodpile or lawn.

[Palmwine Drunkard]

I sincerely hope that I can drink with you someday.
But I don't play "Pants" anymore!

Cheers to you Oggar!