Drunkard Injuries

Remember what happened last night? Good. Now tell the world.

Moderators: Artful Drunktective, mistah willies, NYDingbat, Judge, oettinger, Oggar, Badfellow, Mr Boozificator

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Mountain Miscreant
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Re: Drunkard Injuries

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Savage
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Re: Drunkard Injuries

Post by Savage »

I'll just say, stairs are my nemesis. Is my nemesis. Well, my major ouchy,
like tears in rain

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Re: Drunkard Injuries

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However, they are my dentist's favorite thing.
like tears in rain

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Re: Drunkard Injuries

Post by Mr. Viking »

lets play a nice game of...
mud or bruise


just above left knee knee, oblong, striped. Probable bruise. Give it a rub. No smudging, must be a bruise


outside of right shin, dark, slightly rough parallelegram. Probably dirt. GIve it a rub. Nope, it's a scab. Probably bramble related.


and that's it for todays issue of mud or bruise

see you next blackout awakening for another fun packed episode
"I spent all of my money on cars, women and booze, the rest of it I squandered" G. Best

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booznik
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Re: Drunkard Injuries

Post by booznik »

Palinka wrote:I once came-to to find a bloodied footprint on the ceiling. To this day I have no idea how it got there...
That is a true mystery and perhaps a bit frightening... a shoeprint I would assume came from kicking off/tossing a bloodied shoe onto the ceiling. But a footprint?

Oh Booze Elf, mysterious are your ways, and what's more, you never check your PMs when we demand an explanation. I know, you're busy all the time. Very busy.
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"Oh, you've been reading your Sir Kenelm Digby, haven't you? Stick to the mead recipes, especially that of the Mayor of Moscovy. That shizz is SACK!!!" --Badfellow

"Now stop and DRINK! bastards." --mistah willies

"A stand alone place for booze is as essential for a home, as is a bed to sleep on." --Miklo

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oldsmartskunk
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Re: Drunkard Injuries

Post by oldsmartskunk »

Woke up with a broken tooth. And not the one up front! Almost last one in the lower jaw. How? Where? Why?! Oh, apparently i was bleeding quite a lot, since a piece of broken tooth cut my gums. Those extra curricular activities...

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Patchez
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Re: Drunkard Injuries

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oldsmartskunk wrote:Woke up with a broken tooth. And not the one up front! Almost last one in the lower jaw. How? Where? Why?! Oh, apparently i was bleeding quite a lot, since a piece of broken tooth cut my gums. Those extra curricular activities...
I shattered most of one of my uppers at the rear of my head.
Seems I'm a bit of a Night Grinder. Chomp and grind all night long.
Now you're ready for some anti-dry-otics!-BeerMakesMeSmarter

If worms had daggers, birds wouldn't fuck with them-Todd Snider

Blackout and be extraordinary-Absinthe of Malice

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booznik
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Re: Drunkard Injuries

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oldsmartskunk wrote:Woke up with a broken tooth. And not the one up front! Almost last one in the lower jaw. How? Where? Why?! Oh, apparently i was bleeding quite a lot, since a piece of broken tooth cut my gums. Those extra curricular activities...
You didn't by chance attempt to use your molars as a bottle opener? It's been known to happen.
Patchez wrote:I shattered most of one of my uppers at the rear of my head.
Seems I'm a bit of a Night Grinder. Chomp and grind all night long.
Yikes. I too am a certified Night Grinder. So far, it has only worn down my teeth a bit and not resulted in any serious injuries. But anything can happen, and probably will...
"Booznik. Smooth, classy and manatee-like." --Bur

"Oh, you've been reading your Sir Kenelm Digby, haven't you? Stick to the mead recipes, especially that of the Mayor of Moscovy. That shizz is SACK!!!" --Badfellow

"Now stop and DRINK! bastards." --mistah willies

"A stand alone place for booze is as essential for a home, as is a bed to sleep on." --Miklo

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oldsmartskunk
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Re: Drunkard Injuries

Post by oldsmartskunk »

I think i feel flat on my face, since it was bruised a bit.

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Bur
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Re: Drunkard Injuries

Post by Bur »

oldsmartskunk wrote:I think i feel flat on my face, since it was bruised a bit.
I suggest doors. Autopilot doesn't really always calculate the time difference between roughly pulling it open and stepping forward.

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oldsmartskunk
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Re: Drunkard Injuries

Post by oldsmartskunk »

That or i angered the booze elf.

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booznik
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Re: Drunkard Injuries

Post by booznik »

The plastic cap on my tequila bottle just fucked itself. The inner screwcap portion that was glued into the outer big cap unglued. Trying to pry it off, I sliced a thin layer of skin off my finger in the process (drunkard injury!).

I consulted my drawer full of corks and found one that fit on the second try. A drawer full of corks can be a useful thing. It's a blood bank for booze-bottles.

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"Booznik. Smooth, classy and manatee-like." --Bur

"Oh, you've been reading your Sir Kenelm Digby, haven't you? Stick to the mead recipes, especially that of the Mayor of Moscovy. That shizz is SACK!!!" --Badfellow

"Now stop and DRINK! bastards." --mistah willies

"A stand alone place for booze is as essential for a home, as is a bed to sleep on." --Miklo

Image

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Patchez
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Re: Drunkard Injuries

Post by Patchez »

booznik wrote: A drawer full of corks can be a useful thing. It's a blood bank for booze-bottles.

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I strongly disagree. If I had those at the house I could never use the excuse "But Honey, i have to drink it all tonight. I broke the cap and don't want it all to evaporate."
Now you're ready for some anti-dry-otics!-BeerMakesMeSmarter

If worms had daggers, birds wouldn't fuck with them-Todd Snider

Blackout and be extraordinary-Absinthe of Malice

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Savage
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Re: Drunkard Injuries

Post by Savage »

We have a bit of a problem. The plastic thingies on handles seem to allow leaks on countertops. When one pries off said plastic, one must remember that stated booze flows at a much faster rate. Well, first world problems, as they say.
like tears in rain

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oettinger
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Re: Drunkard Injuries

Post by oettinger »

Aww how cute, booznik collected all his former soothers*.



* (UK = Dummies, US= Pacifiers)
Drink!
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