One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Remember what happened last night? Good. Now tell the world.

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Maj
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by Maj »

#238 Fell off a wall and fucked up my shin . . . not sure how that resulted in me having no money in my wallet in the morning

#239 Stole a cowboy hat from a Cuban gaucho . . . gave it back to him when he asked me nicely

#240 hooked a 100 plus pound King Mackeral . . . lost it at the boat, BUT NOT BECAUSE I WAS DRUNK! IT WAS THE FUCKIN' GUIDE'S FAULT!
I'm not as think as you drunk I am.

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Maj
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

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Palinka wrote:
Dear Booze wrote:Making love to an individual with a HANDicap adds character and commands respect.
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Aww shit I get it now . . . Andy Capp was my favorite cartoon as a kid . . . crazy wife beating drunk.
I'm not as think as you drunk I am.

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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by mistah willies »

Hehehe

Yes, always give the Gaucho his Sombrero back to him when he asks you politely


just guessing here


Never did this


Excellent

.
Can we drink now? ---peetie44
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^ ^ ^ Yes his entire cutlery set and all utensils are made from assorted broken bottles.--- The Artful Detective
Just remember Hugh: a good cocktail in a shitty glass is better that a shitty cocktail in a pretty glass.---The Badfellow
I'll buy the first round if you promise to stop being a cunt. --- Dear Booze

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oettinger
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by oettinger »

mistah willies wrote:Hehehe

Yes, always give the Gaucho his Sombrero back to him when he asks you politely


just guessing here


Never did this


Excellent

.
100 things you plan to do while drunk: steal a riot cops "sombrero"

#241 fell through a shelf and drunken-luckily (again, as always) missed my eye with the broken glass
Drink!
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Bur
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by Bur »

#242 evidently passing out in middle of a sentence is a thing that happened yesterday.

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oldsmartskunk
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by oldsmartskunk »

#243 broke a door handle in the toilet. Was trying to break out of it for an hour. Finally door gave in. Along with the frame. My arms and legs are covered in bruises. Due to this unfortunate event i had to miss a skype session.

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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by hossthomas »

#244 Got invited to my neighbors' house when I was already hammered. Proceeded to drink all of their booze, put a cigarette burn on their couch and keep them up until almost 6 in the morning by loudly slurring personal anecdotes at them. They haven't spoken to me since...
into each life a little stroh's must fall - surreal

i told my landlord and all the other tenants they could fuck off if they don't like hank- hellbound glory

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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

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hossthomas wrote:#244 Got invited to my neighbors' house when I was already hammered. Proceeded to drink all of their booze, put a cigarette burn on their couch and keep them up until almost 6 in the morning by loudly slurring personal anecdotes at them. They haven't spoken to me since...
Good one! If they didn't talk to you after that - they deserved it.

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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by TheDrunkardAnglo »

I broke a porcelain toilet seat in a hostel in Amsterdam. Still to this day I don't know how. I hid it behind the sink.
Major Strasser: What is your nationality?
Rick: I'm a drunkard.
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by Dear Booze »

Herman wrote:... I hid it behind the sink.
A sound plan like that makes perfect sense. No one will find it there.
DRINK!

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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by oettinger »

Dear Booze wrote:
Herman wrote:... I hid it behind the sink.
A sound plan like that makes perfect sense. No one will find it there.
I wouldn`t fore sure. I would in fact only notice during the act of throwing up on my third bottle of Jenever
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by mistah willies »

#246 I once sat down next to a chubby girl on a couch at a house party and put my leg on her thigh. I leaned over, looked deeply into her eyes and asked her if I could get her a drink.

She said, "Get your leg off me! Your knee is hurting my baby!"

True story.

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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by Dear Booze »

mistah willies wrote:#246 I once sat down next to a chubby girl on a couch at a house party and put my leg on her thigh. I leaned over, looked deeply into her eyes and asked her if I could get her a drink.

She said, "Get your leg off me! Your knee is hurting my baby!"

True story.
Some girls are so uptight.

I hope you reminded her that she was "damaged goods" and she should appreciate the attention... and maybe something about her "drinking for two."
DRINK!

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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by oldsmartskunk »

mistah willies wrote:#246 I once sat down next to a chubby girl on a couch at a house party and put my leg on her thigh. I leaned over, looked deeply into her eyes and asked her if I could get her a drink.

She said, "Get your leg off me! Your knee is hurting my baby!"

True story.
A real man always takes pregnant woman for chubby. A fine deed old chap. You did miss a perfect come back one liner: "Get your leg off me! Your knee is hurting my baby!"
"Imagine what my penis will do him. Probably rob him of his virginity before birth"

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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by mistah willies »

oldsmartskunk wrote: A real man always takes pregnant woman for chubby. A fine deed old chap. You did miss a perfect come back one liner: "Get your leg off me! Your knee is hurting my baby!"
"Imagine what my penis will do him. Probably rob him of his virginity before birth"

#247 Got nose pregnant from nose rum while reading that. That's messed up imagery there dude.


Wouldn't have it any other way

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