One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Remember what happened last night? Good. Now tell the world.

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oettinger
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by oettinger »

Oh, and ordered stuff on the internet I REALLY didn`t need.

Drunkard gear and 500 lbs of dung manure incoming...
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Palinka (RIP)
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by Palinka (RIP) »

oettinger wrote:Oh, and ordered stuff on the internet I REALLY didn`t need.

Drunkard gear...
Nonsense, old chap. Everyone needs Drunkard Gear! Especially the official MDM flag. A perfect way to issue your statement of intent at any festival or simply but proudly hung from one's abode, it shows everyone what you stand for in one simple but classy image.

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Who could fail to feel proud to see the beautiful banner fluttering gently in the breeze when reaching for a sturdy breakfast cocktail?
"If I had all the money that I've spent on drink, I'd spend it on drink!"
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oettinger
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by oettinger »

Now that is a flag I definitly need to raise on this leaking ship sailing into sunset. When all is said and done people will hopefully tell stories of columbus adventures and of that other guy who unmistakenly found a whole new universe by sheer misconduct.

Oh, and yeah that other time when he finally drowned, which was way worse than that whole exxon valdez fiasco
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Mr. Viking
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by Mr. Viking »

Resident Asshole wrote:Arm wrestled a French solider whilst watching hockey and shooting fireworks at children at the behest of their father. The soldier was Boozy, fyi.
I take it you lost
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by mistah willies »

Mr. Viking wrote:
Resident Asshole wrote:Arm wrestled a French solider whilst watching hockey and shooting fireworks at children at the behest of their father. The soldier was Boozy, fyi.
I take it you lost
Yet, if drinking Ethyl caused this, then didn't they win?

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FreddyRumsensRevenge
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by FreddyRumsensRevenge »

I don't know if this belongs in this thread or the other "Dos and Don'ts" one, but:

#124: Paid the fare for a high/drunk streetwalker on the streetcar, because she was holding it up and I wanted to get home ASAP and pass out.

Sidenote: doing so may result in said streetwalker plopping herself down on your lap, and sticking her tongue down your throat while fondling your junk, to the hearty and raucous laughter of the streetcar driver and what few passengers there are at 3:45 a.m.

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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by Dear Booze »

FreddyRumsensRevenge wrote:I don't know if this belongs in this thread or the other "Dos and Don'ts" one, but:

#124: Paid the fare for a high/drunk streetwalker on the streetcar, because she was holding it up and I wanted to get home ASAP and pass out.

Sidenote: doing so may result in said streetwalker plopping herself down on your lap, and sticking her tongue down your throat while fondling your junk, to the hearty and raucous laughter of the streetcar driver and what few passengers there are at 3:45 a.m.
This is definately the correct thread! What a great ride home!
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Surreal
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by Surreal »

Resident Asshole wrote:Arm wrestled a French solider whilst watching hockey and shooting fireworks at children at the behest of their father. The soldier was Boozy, fyi.
We almost hit the little guy. That day was a bit fuzzy..... weren't ice cubes made by taking a block of ice outside the Dog House and shooting it w/ a handgun?
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Surreal
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by Surreal »

ThirstyDrunk wrote:
Cnd_Caveman wrote:#117 Make a tutorial video on how to shotgun from a bottle, and wake up to finding out that I've already edited it( on sowftware I just started to learn) and uploaded it to my You tube channel.
Hey! I've done that, man. Or, well similar anyway.

Also I dig hedgehogs.

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fuck em man, it ain't easy walkin the righteous path.
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oettinger
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by oettinger »

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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by Dear Booze »

#125: Agreed to let some friends use my house for a wedding reception.

Fuck! Don't EVER offer your place for family holiday gatherings, graduation parties, work events, or (especially) wedding receptions. Of course, this is one of those things you can only learn one way. Kind of like picking up a cat by his tail.
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by mistah willies »

#126, #127 and #128: Best friend's mom. She'd be arrested these days, and I never said nuttin' to him about it. The last time, I had to crawl out the window... nekkid
and run with my clothes and shoes
shhh dontell anyone

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oettinger
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by oettinger »

#129, plain and simple: got even drunker
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by Palinka (RIP) »

130. Sutured my own injuries. It wasn't pretty but it held.
"If I had all the money that I've spent on drink, I'd spend it on drink!"
"The trouble with internet quotes is that one can never be sure if they are genuine." - Abraham Lincoln
Kindly listen to this, please.
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oettinger
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Re: One Hundred Things I've Done While Drunk

Post by oettinger »

# !? 131, internal error. Windows has noticed you are not drunk enough to use the internet.
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