Drunk Travel Log

[Lush City]

[oettinger]

^^^ Animal hater!

One day your dickleftovers will be fed to sharks.


Wait your dick is so small we could only feed it to wale sharks

[Dear Booze]

I will be spending the reat of the weekend in LA. I plan on drinking at the Prince of Whales bar and putting se eral rounds on Lush City's tab.

Thanks Lush.

[Dear Booze]

We made it to the Los Angeles basin in four hours and are now traveling on the freeway at an average of 33 MPH. This is why I hate L.A.

[Dear Booze]

five and a half hours later...

finally checked into room in downtown long beach. im thirsty.

[Dear Booze]

Finally. Gooch and I have settled in at the Auld Dubliner bar on Pine and Bay Streets. It's a warm 82 degrees. Beer is cold, people are nice.

[Artful Drunktective]

Now whatcha guys doin'? Drinking piña coladas sunbathing in your swim trunks with your pedicured toes in the sand?

[Dear Booze]

sitting 11 rows up 20 yard line at Chargers/Redskins game. pitifully undrunk

[oettinger]

Go to an eagles/raiders game next time. But make sure to bring body armor

[Dear Booze]

Okay. So, we took off this morning, heading for Denver. After a short stop, we headed to New Orleans. Everything is different here. It's a different culture. People behave differently. Drink. Drunk. Drank. Fuck!

Ryans Irish Bar, Trpical Isle, The Dungion, Toulouse dive bar, Marriott Hotel Bar.

Drunk.

[Artful Drunktective]

You were heading to Denwer but ended up in N'awlins? Obviously you didn't ask Alexa where to go.

[Artful Drunktective]

Okay. So, we took off this morning, heading for the Northwest Angle. After a short stop, we headed to New Orleans.

Drunk.

And who is "we"? Like the "royal we?*** "You know, the editorial... I dropped off the money, exactly as per... Look, man I've got certain information alright? Certain things have come to light, and uh, ya know, has it ever occurred to you, that uh, instead of uh, you know running around, uh uh, blaming me, given the nature of all this new shit, you know it, it it, this could be a uh, a lot more uh, uh, uh, uh, complex, I mean it's not just, it might not be, just such a simple, uh... you know?"

***the collective body of a nation or state as politically organized with the king/queen being viewed as the head, the peasantry being viewed as the legs etc.

[mistah willies]

You were heading to Denwer but ended up in N'awlins? Obviously you didn't ask Alexa where to go.

(Psssst... those are his code words for the bathroom and the bedroom. Don't ask me which one has the beads. Shhhh...)

Dear Booze! Travel well and full report please, young traveler. May you get more beads than Roseanna.

DRINK!

[Dear Booze]

You were heading to Denwer but ended up in N'awlins? Obviously you didn't ask Alexa where to go.

(Psssst... those are his code words for the bathroom and the bedroom. Don't ask me which one has the beads. Shhhh...)

Dear Booze! Travel well and full report please, young traveler. May you get more beads than Roseanna.

DRINK!

STFU AD

This (Today) is the anniversary of the battle of New Orleans.

Play "Battle of New Orleans…"

In 1814 we took a little trip
Along with Colonel Jackson down the mighty Mississippi
We took a little bacon and we took a little beans
And we caught the bloody British in the town of New Orleans

We fired our guns and the British kept a-comin'
There wasn't nigh as many as there was a while ago
We fired once more and they began to runnin'
On down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico

We looked down the river and we seed the British come
And there must have been a hundred of 'em beatin' on the drum
They stepped so high and they made their bugles ring
We stood behind our cotton bales and didn't say a thing

We fired our guns and the British kept a-comin'
There wasn't nigh as many as there was a while ago
We fired once more and they began to runnin'
On down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico

Old Hickory said we could take 'em by surprise
If we didn't fire our muskets till we looked 'em in the eyes
We held our fire till we seed their faces well
Then we opened up our squirrel guns and gave 'em
Well, we

Fired our guns and the British kept a-comin'
There wasn't nigh as many as there was a while ago
We fired once more and they began to runnin'
On down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico

Yeah they ran through the briers and they ran through the brambles
And they ran through the bushes where a rabbit couldn't go
They ran so fast that the hounds couldn't catch 'em
On down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico

We fired our cannon till the barrel melted down
So we grabbed an alligator and we fought another round
We filled his head with cannonballs 'n' powdered his behind
And when we touched the powder off, the gator lost his mind

We fired our guns and the British kept a-comin'
There wasn't nigh as many as there was a while ago
We fired once more and they began to runnin'
On down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico

Yeah they ran through the briers and they ran through the brambles
And they ran through the bushes where a rabbit couldn't go
They ran so fast that the hounds couldn't catch 'em
On down the Mississippi to the Gulf of Mexico

[Artful Drunktective]

You were heading to Denwer but ended up in N'awlins? Obviously you didn't ask Alexa where to go.

(Psssst... those are his code words for the bathroom and the bedroom. Don't ask me which one has the beads. Shhhh...)

Dear Booze! Travel well and full report please, young traveler. May you get more beads than Roseanna.

DRINK!

STFU AD

HAY! Why am I gettin' all the STFUps when Willies bagged yer balls as well?

This story comes out in my mind sounding Beverly Hillbillyish.

Where are you now anyway? Don't be late for your city council meeting tomorrow.