Brian Griffin says... (The Family Guy Thread)

[Miss Conception]

Stewie, "You're drunk."
Brian (slurring), "I'm not drunk, I just have a speech impetiment."
(falls off chair) "and an inner ear infection."
(vomits) "and a stomach virus."

:lol:

[mountainmanMao]

Stewie, "You're drunk."
Brian (slurring), "I'm not drunk, I just have a speech impetiment."
(falls off chair) "and an inner ear infection."
(vomits) "and a stomach virus."

:lol:

Damn, I just came down with a speech impetiment, inner ear infection, and stomach virus.

It must be an epidemic. I must quarantine myself and keep drinking to kill the virus.

[Miss Conception]

Peter Griffin vs. Michael Moore - farting contest :D

http://poststuff5.entensity.net/092305/ ... dia=fg.wmv

[Miss Conception]

Quagmire, "Let's play Drink The Beer."
Peter, "What do I win?"
Quagmire, "Another beer!"


Peter (peeing in a grandfather clock) "Hey Joe, Your clock won't flush."

[Pee]

Peter (after Lois tells him he's childish):

"If I'm a child that means you're a pedophile, and I'll be damned if i'm going stand here and take this from a pervert."

[Pee]

(The family is coming back from the basketball game)


Peter: Hey nice job Chris! You wiped the floor with that towel!
Chris: Yeah did you see me when that hottie was all up im ma kool aid!? Yeah I was about to break off a lil' somthin somthin but then my crew gave me the 411 on that skank and shes all about the bling-bling!
(Peter slams on the breaks)
Peter: Meg start reading at Pslam 41 and don't stop! The power of Christ compels you! The power of Christ compels you! (While Peter is squirting holy water in Chris's eyes)
Lois: Peter what on earth are you doing?!
Peter: The boy is speaking in tounges Lois!
The power of Christ compels you! The power of Christ compels you!
Lois: Peter stop it! He's not possesed!
Meg: Yeah he's just talking street. A lot of kids do it.
Peter: Oh. Well that's weird.

[Miss Conception]

Stewie's acting coach, "That Olivia is being a little frosty box."


Lois (grabbing Peter's junk) "THIS IS MINE. THIS IS WHERE MY BABIES COME FROM!!!"


Stewie, "What are you doing fat man?"
Peter, "Run along now, Daddy needs some alone time."
Brian, "What's wrong Peter?"
Peter, "Last night (sobbing) Lois was the man."

[Pee]

i just watched the Stewie Griffin movie.

Pretty good.

Too many deep to remember any quotes.

He gets drunk though. Brain does it to him.

[GSG]

Brian: Hola, me llamo es Brian ... Nosotros queremos ir con ustedes.. uhhhh ...
Spanish Bellboy: Hey, that was pretty good, except when you said "me llamo es Brian," you don't need the "es," just me llamo Brian.
Brian: Oh, you speak English!
Bellboy (sigh): No, just that first speech and this one explaining it.
Brian: You .... you're kidding me, right?
Bellboy: Que?


Lois: You're drunk again.
Peter: No, I'm just exhausted 'cause I've been up all night drinking.


Lois: Oh, my God! You can only play the piano when you're drunk!
Peter: Now that's not true! I can also vomit, fall down and make dirty calls to your sister when I'm drunk

[vat69]

peter: fellas, fellas, we'll drink till shes hot!
Quagmire: hey, thats just crazy enough to work!

( after finding out peters "assablanca" porno was taped over by a show on the statue of liberty.)

the next day:
lois: 37 beers. i hope your happy peter.
peter: now lois, i only drank so the statue of liberty would take her clothes off.

[vat69]

after wine tasting with lois's father:

"you did tell him he wasnt supposed to swallow the wine, right?"

peter: hey wheres that peter griffin guy, he said he'd pay me 100 bucks to take off all my clothes off.

[Mister Priapus]

Brian: You just need to control your anger like I do.
Stewie: Oh, you mean by being sauced all day?

Brian: You're drunk!
Stewie: You're sexy!

Stewie: What are you talking about? I've never felt better! *pukes on Brian* Ok, now I've never felt better.

Stewie: *raising his martini glass* To the black man: Thanks for taking it all in stride!

Stewie: Feel free to say no to this but would you mind shaving my coin purse?

I'll have a Sam Adams, please
It's 9:30 in the morning!'
And don't you have an outstanding DUI?
Yeah, but I gotta get the taste of weed and hooker spit out of my mouth.
I'll have a Sam Adams as well.

[Drinkin' Jack]

My kids watch that show. I think it's time to turn it off for them, they're starting to laugh at the really funny parts.

[The General]

Brian Griffin: [drunk and encouraging Peter's drinking] Go! Go! Go!
Lois Griffin: [entering the room] Peter, it's 6 o'clock in the morning!
Brian Griffin: Thanks for the update, Big Ben.
[Peter and Brian laugh]
Lois Griffin: You're drunk again!
Peter Griffin: No, I'm just exhausted 'cause I've been up all night drinking.

Or

Lois Griffin: Typical male fantasy. Women drinking beer. I can guarantee that a man made that commercial.
Peter Griffin: Of course they did. It's a commercial, not a delicious Thanksgiving dinner.

Or

[Peter is watching a beer commercial]
Announcer: Pawtucket Patriot Beer. If you drink it, hot women will have sex in your backyard.

Or

[the Griffins have been invited for dinner at the Campbells, a family of nudists]
Dotty Campbell: Peter, can I get you a beer? I've got Bush.
[Peter unwillingly looks down at Dotty's crotch]
Dotty Campbell: Oh, and Bush Lite.

Or

Lois Griffin: You should spend some time with our kids, Peter. And with me.
Peter Griffin: Uh, what could me and you do together?
[Lois giggles]
Peter Griffin: Lois. You've got a sick mind.
Lois Griffin: Peter, I'm talking about making love.
Peter Griffin: Oh. I thought you wanted us to murder the children and harvest their organs for beer money.

Or

Peter Griffin: Come on. Let's go drink till we can't feel feelings any more.

Or

Peter Griffin: Boo Lois, yeah beer!

[Mister Priapus]

Brian: I've been around. I've licked my share of peanut butter.