A quote from the bartender last night

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Mr. Viking
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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by Mr. Viking »

I tried to distance myself at first, but after consideration can see no alternative other than an all out assault on the drys. I hereby register myself in the modern dunkard division
"I spent all of my money on cars, women and booze, the rest of it I squandered" G. Best

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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by Palinka (RIP) »

Mr. Viking wrote:...I hereby register myself in the modern dunkard division
Join my outfit, son, and not only will you serve with a fellow Briton, but also I can get you a commission; how does 2nd Lieutenant sound*?



* Bearing in mind that, at this moment in time, GinSoakedGirl is still a CSM...
"If I had all the money that I've spent on drink, I'd spend it on drink!"
"The trouble with internet quotes is that one can never be sure if they are genuine." - Abraham Lincoln
Kindly listen to this, please.
ドロンケン
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Mr. Viking
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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by Mr. Viking »

I'm a landowner. I demand better at all times
"I spent all of my money on cars, women and booze, the rest of it I squandered" G. Best

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mistah willies
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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by mistah willies »

WavesChaaarge! !

Them Dry Fucjs Have Sand In Their Sacks. We Attack At Thecrack OfDa...


The cap!

Let Loose Your Cannons roaourer!
Damn Th Phones!

All OneCanViewsIsCaps, LikE waves

SlleeppI'm Stop And Go To

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oettinger
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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by oettinger »

Gentlemen, I might report that the drinking-tanks need a new greasing. Enemy is approaching full front, but we might sneak a spy into their dusted milk-bar. We need an insane volunteer for this mission. Only thing we can offer is two flasks of bourbon on the go and all our hopes.
Mission goals:
- get drunk
- misbehave
- piss beside the toilett

Signed, Sgt. Whisky "Shotgun" Walker
If water was so healthy, why do you die when you drown in it?
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Badfellow
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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by Badfellow »

Palinka wrote:Colonel Sherman T. Palinka of the 70% ABV Vodka Volunteers, reporting in. I have seen the enemy and my boys and I are willing to lob volley after volley of Vodka (down our throughts) in defence...

It is a privilege, Colonel. Volunteers are always a cut above the rest, standing bravely breathing fumes in the face of the enemy. My lads have got your flank.

<<<Attention, attention. HQ has issued a directive to establish a provisional base (Camp Usquebaugh) in the Scottish Highlands for the purpose of booze joint-training exercises, or advanced "cross-drinking" technique in the ramp-up for Operation: Overdrunk. Master Gunnery Sgt. Oggar will be in charge of discipline, the Clash of the Tightest simulator program and the mixed drinks obstacle course. That is all.>>>

mistah willies wrote:WavesChaaarge! !
Them Dry Fucjs Have Sand In Their Sacks. We Attack At Thecrack OfDa...

Sgt. Willies Walker! I thought we might have lost you upriver again to Col. Kurtz. Are your Krakenistas ready to give the Sand Sacks hell, old chap?
ພາສາລາວNONE GENUINE WITHOUT MY SIGNATUREພາສາລາວ

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Patchez
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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by Patchez »

Badfellow wrote: I must say, your recent "conversion" experience with gin must have been profound, sir!



Viva los borrachos! Viva revolucion!

I tend to jump off the deep end without hesitation when I give something a "try". Total immersion seems to be the best way to get a real feel for it.
Now you're ready for some anti-dry-otics!-BeerMakesMeSmarter

If worms had daggers, birds wouldn't fuck with them-Todd Snider

Blackout and be extraordinary-Absinthe of Malice

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mistah willies
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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by mistah willies »

Badfellow wrote:Tonight, the Whiskey Rebels and are meeting up with the Krakenistas in the hills for a coordinated guerrilla strike on the dry strongholds.
Arrrrgh!

Mistah Willies reporting in! My troops came under attack on Mount Gay and we poured the fire of the heavens upon them damned Drys. Hopefully you received the secret message spoken in Drunkardese that no DRY can ever decipher. We suffered some casualties, but none of the seriousties ever gave up hope.

TOnight is a sneak recon, to plant land mines and recover our position.

The Krakenistas await on the hillside of the Mount, and perhaps by morning's light, word will be heard from the Special Ops team of them Thirsty bastidges.

The secret code is written on the bottom of a bottle (a bottomle? or is it a bottlebum?)

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WAR!


Come with me now






CHUG!

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oettinger
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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by oettinger »

Oettinger reporting in sir, Badfellow, sir.
them drys have taken over the town of stupid reasons.
Gin rockets will be fired to rescue that dry space.
Over and out.
If water was so healthy, why do you die when you drown in it?
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Badfellow
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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by Badfellow »

Here now is a performance by the BBC Philharmonic of Holst's Mars: The Bringer of War to fuel your fight against dry tyranny and the minions of the mundane. May a zombie Gustav rise from the grave and eat John Williams' braaaaains.

And now a few messages for our brothers and sisters out on the lines...
*The whiskey is in the creek. The whiskey is in the creek.
*John has mud-butt. John has mud-butt.

It's another glorious day in the free drinking world. Victory is close and the oppressors are in disarray, but this war isn't over by a damn sight! Don't give up the fight! Join the resistance! Drink! The revolutionary cause needs YOU!
ພາສາລາວNONE GENUINE WITHOUT MY SIGNATUREພາສາລາວ

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oettinger
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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by oettinger »

Smitty "Hot shot" Williams here, distillery is ours, win is within reach again.
Cold beer and vodka ready for the final shootout
If water was so healthy, why do you die when you drown in it?
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mistah willies
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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by mistah willies »

oettinger wrote: Mission goals:
1. get drunk
2. misbehave
3. piss beside the toilett


Signed, Sgt. Whisky "Shotgun" Walker
1. Done

2. Done

3. and Done

Miss Behave was the favorite, Sgt. Walker.

Reporting her joke to this warriror, verbatim:

Ich hielt Fummelei.

Sie sagte: Ist es zu groß, um zu tragen, oder zu klein, um zu fangen?

Sie hörte auf zu reden, wenn ihr Mund war voll.

Hope this dirty joke can be deciphered, good Sgt W.

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oettinger
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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by oettinger »

What the heck Willies?!?
Dirty you. Dirty...
This calls for fresh beer.
If water was so healthy, why do you die when you drown in it?
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mistah willies
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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by mistah willies »

+clink+



DRINK!


*hiccup*

DRINK!

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mistah willies
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Re: A quote from the bartender last night

Post by mistah willies »

oettinger wrote:Smitty "Hot shot" Williams here, distillery is ours, win is within reach again.
Cold beer and vodka ready for the final shootout
Hot Shot, it appears that we are the last men standing.

We await an attack tomorrow from the weekend warriors who become Irish for a day.

We can defend against the fakers, but maybe we can steal some? Shanghai.


Or,

we can regulate.

Now strengthen yourself for the assault! ( ass salt? No.)



DRINK!

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