Quotes from a Dry

Post your favorite quips of wino wisdom here.

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Quotes from a Dry

Post by mistah willies »

Yeah, live with two of 'em now.

Offered the ChunkieMonk a free PBR, and he said, "No thanks, bro. I'm allergic to beer."

I said, "Hah?"

He said, "I break out in handcuffs."

This was ten minutes ago.

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Re: Quotes from a Dry

Post by Palinka (RIP) »

mistah willies wrote:...he said, "No thanks, bro. I'm allergic to beer."...
It's a ruse to get his hands on your Kraken (and maybe your toilet paper - have you checked for SqualorMan recently?)
"If I had all the money that I've spent on drink, I'd spend it on drink!"
"The trouble with internet quotes is that one can never be sure if they are genuine." - Abraham Lincoln
Kindly listen to this, please.
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Re: Quotes from a Dry

Post by mistah willies »

Palinka wrote:
mistah willies wrote:...he said, "No thanks, bro. I'm allergic to beer."...
It's a ruse to get his hands on your Kraken (and maybe your toilet paper - have you checked for SqualorMan recently?)

We are all ensqualored, if we don't keep our minds on our arses.

I know you to be very hygienic, but here, well, sometimes it appears, among a certain individual, the teepee may not be actually used at all.

Squalor alert!


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Re: Quotes from a Dry

Post by AntonArkydivich »

My Russian friend's dry mother-in-law, upon finding out he likes whiskey:

"You drink?! Have you ever seen a grown man shit his pants?!"

As a matter of fact I have. It was my Russian friend, very drunk, playing midnight golf. And it was hilarious.
Making my own city lights out of bourbon and the stars of a barroom fight.
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Re: Quotes from a Dry

Post by Mr. Viking »

"why do you drink"

"I don't like feeling like I'm not in control"

"I don't need to drink to feel like I'm having fun"

etc

etc
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Re: Quotes from a Dry

Post by oettinger »

Mr. Viking wrote: "I don't need to drink to feel like I'm having fun"
Yep the worst.

"I become another person" is also great. I mean if you like to wear dresses just do it
"I might forget myself" spot on stupid! I always forget
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Re: Quotes from a Dry

Post by Patchez »

I reply to the you don't have to drink to have fun, well you don't need sneakers to run but it fucking helps.
Now you're ready for some anti-dry-otics!-BeerMakesMeSmarter

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Blackout and be extraordinary-Absinthe of Malice

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Re: Quotes from a Dry

Post by mistah willies »

Patchez wrote:I reply to the you don't have to drink to have fun, well you don't need sneakers to run but it fucking helps.
Yes indeed.

In that manner: "I think you're addicted to coffee, cigs, and going to meetings in the church basement"

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Re: Quotes from a Dry

Post by oettinger »

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Somethign is wrong woith him
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Re: Quotes from a Dry

Post by oettinger »

"/mx9Uck6uB63VIKFYnEMXrRJtnKITppOI_IvcXXDNrsc.woff2)format('woff2');unicode-range:U+0370-03FF;}@font-face{font-family:'Roboto';font-style:normal;font-weight:500;src:local('Roboto Medium'),local('Roboto-Medium'),url(//fonts.gstatic.com/s/roboto" Totally caught me off guard.

I mean, I drink heavily but shit like this makes me sick
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Re: Quotes from a Dry

Post by mistah willies »

oettinger wrote:"/mx9Uck6uB63VIKFYnEMXrRJtnKITppOI_IvcXXDNrsc.woff2)format('woff2');unicode-range:U+0370-03FF;}@font-face{font-family:'Roboto';font-style:normal;font-weight:500;src:local('Roboto Medium'),local('Roboto-Medium'),url(//fonts.gstatic.com/s/roboto" Totally caught me off guard.

I mean, I drink heavily but shit like this makes me sick
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Re: Quotes from a Dry

Post by shawnonious »

....
Last edited by shawnonious on Tue Dec 07, 2021 11:24 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Quotes from a Dry

Post by Dear Booze »

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Medium'),local('Roboto-Medium'),url(//fonts.gstatic.com/s/roboto/v15/oOeFwZNlrTefzLYmlVV1UBJtnKITppOI_IvcXXDNrsc.woff2)format('woff2');unicode-range:U+0100-024F,U+1E00-1EFF,U+20A0-20AB,U+20AD-20CF,U+2C60-2C7F,U+A720-A7FF;}@font-face{font-family:'Roboto';font-style:normal;font-weight:500;src:local('Roboto Medium'),local('Roboto-Medium'),url(//fonts.gstatic.com/s/roboto/v15/RxZJdnzeo3R5zSexge8UUVtXRa8TVwTICgirnJhmVJw.woff2)format('woff2');unicode-range:U+0000-00FF,U+0131,U+0152-0153,U+02C6,U+02DA,U+02DC,U+2000-206F,U+2074,U+20AC,U+2212,U+2215,U+E0FF,U+EFFD,U+F000;}@font-face{font-family:'Roboto';font-style:italic;font-weight:500;src:local('Roboto Medium Italic'),local('Roboto-MediumItalic'),url(//fonts.gstatic.com/s/roboto/v15/OLffGBTaF0XFOW1gnuHF0TTOQ_MqJVwkKsUn0wKzc2I.woff2)format('woff2');unicode-range:U+0460-052F,U+20B4,U+2DE0-2DFF,U+A640-A69F;}@font-face{font-family:'Roboto';font-style:italic;font-weight:500;src:local('Roboto Medium Italic'),local('Roboto-MediumItalic'),url(//fonts.gstatic.com/s/roboto/v15/OLffGBTaF0XFOW1gnuHF0TUj_cnvWIuuBMVgbX098Mw.woff2)format('woff2');unicode-range:U+0400-045F,U+0490-0491,U+04B0-04B1,U+2116;}@font-face{font-family:'Roboto';font-style:italic;font-weight:500;src:local('Roboto Medium Italic'),local('Roboto-MediumItalic'),url(//fonts.gstatic.com/s/roboto/v15/OLffGBTaF0XFOW1gnuHF0UbcKLIaa1LC45dFaAfauRA.woff2)format('woff2');unicode-range:U+1F00-1FFF;}@font-face{font-family:'Roboto';font-style:italic;font-weight:500;src:local('Roboto Medium Italic'),local('Roboto-MediumItalic'),url(//fonts.gstatic.com/s/roboto/v15/OLffGBTaF0XFOW1gnuHF0Wo_sUJ8uO4YLWRInS22T3Y.woff2)format('woff2');unicode-range:U+0370-03FF;}@font-face{font-family:'Roboto';font-style:italic;font-weight:500;src:local('Roboto
Compelling! But oh so true. Couldn't have said it better. I especially like the part where you said "+02DA,U+02DC,U+2000-206F,U+2074,U+20AC,U+2212"
DRINK!

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oettinger
Juicing Like Jackie
Juicing Like Jackie
Posts: 14255
Joined: Sun Nov 10, 2013 10:23 am

Re: Quotes from a Dry

Post by oettinger »

^^^ Nasty huh? I was thinking hard about leaving that part out
Drink!
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