Drinking Quotes

Post your favorite quips of wino wisdom here.

Moderators: Artful Drunktective, mistah willies, NYDingbat, Judge, oettinger, Oggar, Badfellow, Mr Boozificator

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Artful Drunktective
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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by Artful Drunktective » Mon May 07, 2018 5:59 pm

Fish is basically a vegetable. - Old Smart Skunk
How can it be so cold in here? It's like Greenland in here. We've got to get some booze. It's the only solution to this intense cold. Something's got to be done. We can't go on like this. - Withnail
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Nausea
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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by Nausea » Sat May 26, 2018 12:06 pm

"I'm just for real." -- oettinger

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ThirstyDrunk
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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by ThirstyDrunk » Thu Sep 20, 2018 5:26 pm

"Predilection to sour mash don't make a man stupid."
try it

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Bur
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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by Bur » Sat Sep 22, 2018 6:00 am

ThirstyDrunk wrote:
Thu Sep 20, 2018 5:26 pm
"Predilection to sour mash don't make a man stupid."
Way too deep for me.

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Nausea
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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by Nausea » Sun Sep 30, 2018 6:45 pm

"I still like beer." -- Brett Kavanaugh

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mistah willies
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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by mistah willies » Mon Oct 01, 2018 1:30 am

Nausea wrote:
Sun Sep 30, 2018 6:45 pm
"I still like beer." -- Brett Kavanaugh
Everyone has a redeeming quality, don't they?
Given the opportunity to be under scrutiny by a bunch of old politicians for a lifetime appointment, I'd say fuck that unless there's a keg.

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Patchez
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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by Patchez » Mon Oct 01, 2018 11:29 pm

mistah willies wrote:
Mon Oct 01, 2018 1:30 am
Nausea wrote:
Sun Sep 30, 2018 6:45 pm
"I still like beer." -- Brett Kavanaugh
Everyone has a redeeming quality, don't they?
Given the opportunity to be under scrutiny by a bunch of old politicians for a lifetime appointment, I'd say fuck that unless there's a keg.
Wrong. He sucks. Also his yearbook lists him as a member of the Malibu Fan Club. No self respecting drunk drinks that shit unless there is nothing, this means mouthwash as well, left in the house. you sure as hell won't join it's fan club.
“The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy also mentions alcohol. It says that the best drink in existence is the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster, the effect of which is like having your brains smashed out with a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick.” -Douglas Adams

If worms had daggers, birds wouldn't fuck with them-Todd Snider

Blackout and be extraordinary-Absinthe of Malice

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mistah willies
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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by mistah willies » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:53 am

Patchez wrote:
Mon Oct 01, 2018 11:29 pm
mistah willies wrote:
Mon Oct 01, 2018 1:30 am
Nausea wrote:
Sun Sep 30, 2018 6:45 pm
"I still like beer." -- Brett Kavanaugh
Everyone has a redeeming quality, don't they?
Given the opportunity to be under scrutiny by a bunch of old politicians for a lifetime appointment, I'd say fuck that unless there's a keg.
Wrong. He sucks. Also his yearbook lists him as a member of the Malibu Fan Club. No self respecting drunk drinks that shit unless there is nothing, this means mouthwash as well, left in the house. you sure as hell won't join it's fan club.
Indeed, he sucks. No excuse for assaulting anyone.
That's never under dispute here.

As far as a single redeeming quality, it's not that he was born into the richboy fratbro WASP entitlements and mentality.

No, it's this:
dude hung out with someone named "Squi"

Squi. Oh, the stories of Squi. That's friggin hilarious on a whole 'nother douchebag level.

MITCHELL: The entry says, and I quote, go to ‘Timmy’s for skis with Judge, Tom, P.J. Bernie and ... Squi?’

KAVANAUGH: Squi. It’s a nickname.


So what was Brett's nickname? I'll bet he was the nerd with money that they invited each time, and he sat in the corner writing in calendars and watching things, drinking by himself at parties, and then he sees an opportunity to meet a girl and unleashed his inner demon of anger, self-hatred and misogynist rapist tendencies.

But, Squi! That's sad and funny, that part.

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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by Dear Booze » Sat Oct 27, 2018 1:44 pm

When your cocktail decides to speak for you, don't interrupt. Just listen. It may say something profound.
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a drunk man tortilla chips, Velveeta and a hair dryer and he has nachos.

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