Just bought some Malort

A place for general talk.

Moderators: Artful Drunktective, mistah willies, NYDingbat, Judge, oettinger, Oggar, Badfellow, Mr Boozificator

Post Reply
User avatar
calx
Drinking God's Good Scotch
Drinking God's Good Scotch
Posts: 2736
Joined: Sat Apr 19, 2008 8:34 pm
Location: Hell on Earf

Just bought some Malort

Post by calx »

Anyone tried this stuff? I actually heard about it first on this website from an awesome old article if anyone can find it.

I'm planning on giving a shot to all my friends this Christmas coz I love em so much. :D
Watch "The Money Masters" on youtube and read "The Creature From Jekyll Island" by G. Edward Griffin to unveil the true enemy.

Innovating the human race to extinction.™

Long live David Icke!

User avatar
ThirstyDrunk
Juicing Like Jackie
Juicing Like Jackie
Posts: 12700
Joined: Sun Oct 08, 2006 10:35 pm
Location: Xenia

Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by ThirstyDrunk »

CHUG THAT SHIT!
Like a desperate thirst in a raging drought

User avatar
ThirstyDrunk
Juicing Like Jackie
Juicing Like Jackie
Posts: 12700
Joined: Sun Oct 08, 2006 10:35 pm
Location: Xenia

Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by ThirstyDrunk »

Like a desperate thirst in a raging drought

User avatar
Surreal
King Cockeyed
King Cockeyed
Posts: 1871
Joined: Fri Sep 12, 2008 10:54 am
Location: stage left

Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by Surreal »

Some sick twisted bastard sent me that during the old MDM Xmas Booze Exchange.

I’ve chugged a lot of shit. Even chugged some merlot w/ our dear friend Thirsty. Well, truth be told he chugged about the whole bottle and left very little for me...... but that Malort shit is pure evil. I can’t think of a worse tasting booze than Malort.

That being said, grab yourself some and report back.

On a side note - it’s a Chicago tradition. The Jeppson’s Malort. They had a contest some time ago and the locals were asked to dream up a new marketing slogan. Here’s what they came up with:

Malort, kick your mouth in the balls!
Malort, when you need to unfriend someone IN PERSON.
Malort, tonight's the night you fight your dad.
Malort, the Champagne of pain.
Malort, turning taste-buds into taste-foes for generations.
Drink Malort, it's easier than telling people you have nothing to live for.
Malort, what soap washes its mouth out with.
Malort, these pants aren't going to sh** themselves.
fuck em man, it ain't easy walkin the righteous path.
- Hoss

User avatar
drunkin' Wisconsinite
Super Drunkard
Super Drunkard
Posts: 134
Joined: Wed Feb 01, 2006 12:04 pm
Location: The Mad City - U. S. of A.

Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by drunkin' Wisconsinite »

it's like vomiting in reverse

User avatar
peetie44
Juicing Like Jackie
Juicing Like Jackie
Posts: 10389
Joined: Sun Mar 16, 2008 3:05 am
Location: Belgium, Austin TX, SoCal, Branson MO, Cape Cod MA

Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by peetie44 »

calx wrote:
Tue Dec 04, 2018 10:22 pm
Anyone tried this stuff? I actually heard about it first on this website from an awesome old article if anyone can find it.

I'm planning on giving a shot to all my friends this Christmas coz I love em so much. :D
You poor bastard...
"Man i once bought $101 worth of insect candy because it was free shipping on orders over 100 bucks." -- ThirstyDrunk

"I wanted a shark high on crack dumped into a piranha tank! I wanted college AD's to pull their human faces off, then dive at each other's lizard throats!" -- waahoohah

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q01p7k6T ... e=youtu.be

User avatar
Patchez
Drinking Like W.C.
Drinking Like W.C.
Posts: 6534
Joined: Sat Feb 06, 2010 6:41 pm
Location: South Central, PA

Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by Patchez »

Al these horror stories make me want to find it even more. Masochistic drinking anyone?
Now you're ready for some anti-dry-otics!-BeerMakesMeSmarter

If worms had daggers, birds wouldn't fuck with them-Todd Snider

Blackout and be extraordinary-Absinthe of Malice

User avatar
Badfellow
Juicing Like Jackie
Juicing Like Jackie
Posts: 10724
Joined: Tue Oct 04, 2005 3:05 pm
Location: Republic of Drunkardia

Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by Badfellow »

Malort: it's like there's a party in your mouth and everyone's invited... including the dozen or so gutter punks who pissed on the floor and burned down the house.
ພາສາລາວNONE GENUINE WITHOUT MY SIGNATUREພາສາລາວ

User avatar
oettinger
Juicing Like Jackie
Juicing Like Jackie
Posts: 14248
Joined: Sun Nov 10, 2013 10:23 am

Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by oettinger »

It`s one of the few bad liquors that get even worse by mixing them with something
Drink!
Image
Image

User avatar
drunkin' Wisconsinite
Super Drunkard
Super Drunkard
Posts: 134
Joined: Wed Feb 01, 2006 12:04 pm
Location: The Mad City - U. S. of A.

Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by drunkin' Wisconsinite »


User avatar
Badfellow
Juicing Like Jackie
Juicing Like Jackie
Posts: 10724
Joined: Tue Oct 04, 2005 3:05 pm
Location: Republic of Drunkardia

Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by Badfellow »

Speaking of Malort, this guy is a freakin tank.
ພາສາລາວNONE GENUINE WITHOUT MY SIGNATUREພາສາລາວ

User avatar
calx
Drinking God's Good Scotch
Drinking God's Good Scotch
Posts: 2736
Joined: Sat Apr 19, 2008 8:34 pm
Location: Hell on Earf

Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by calx »

peetie44 wrote:
Wed Dec 05, 2018 1:52 pm
calx wrote:
Tue Dec 04, 2018 10:22 pm
Anyone tried this stuff? I actually heard about it first on this website from an awesome old article if anyone can find it.

I'm planning on giving a shot to all my friends this Christmas coz I love em so much. :D
You poor bastard...
God bless ya Peetie hope you are well.

It finally came in the mail after reading about it here so long ago. Drank it on Christmas Eve with my best friend and his family and neighbors. He's a Mexican dude who is very fond of drink ha. We both winced. It wasn't so good but I'd drink it again! :D

~Tales from a drunk English major who has no idea what he's doin

Also Thirsty call me soon man I miss talking with ya.
Watch "The Money Masters" on youtube and read "The Creature From Jekyll Island" by G. Edward Griffin to unveil the true enemy.

Innovating the human race to extinction.™

Long live David Icke!

User avatar
peetie44
Juicing Like Jackie
Juicing Like Jackie
Posts: 10389
Joined: Sun Mar 16, 2008 3:05 am
Location: Belgium, Austin TX, SoCal, Branson MO, Cape Cod MA

Re: Just bought some Malort

Post by peetie44 »

calx wrote:
Fri Dec 28, 2018 11:52 pm
peetie44 wrote:
Wed Dec 05, 2018 1:52 pm
calx wrote:
Tue Dec 04, 2018 10:22 pm
Anyone tried this stuff? I actually heard about it first on this website from an awesome old article if anyone can find it.

I'm planning on giving a shot to all my friends this Christmas coz I love em so much. :D
You poor bastard...
God bless ya Peetie hope you are well.

It finally came in the mail after reading about it here so long ago. Drank it on Christmas Eve with my best friend and his family and neighbors. He's a Mexican dude who is very fond of drink ha. We both winced. It wasn't so good but I'd drink it again! :D

~Tales from a drunk English major who has no idea what he's doin

Also Thirsty call me soon man I miss talking with ya.
Good to hear from you, calx...and glad to know the Malort stayed down.
"Man i once bought $101 worth of insect candy because it was free shipping on orders over 100 bucks." -- ThirstyDrunk

"I wanted a shark high on crack dumped into a piranha tank! I wanted college AD's to pull their human faces off, then dive at each other's lizard throats!" -- waahoohah

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q01p7k6T ... e=youtu.be

Post Reply