Drinking Quotes

Post your favorite quips of wino wisdom here.

Moderators: Badfellow, Mr Boozificator, Artful Drunktective, mistah willies, NYDingbat, Judge, oettinger, Oggar

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Artful Drunktective
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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by Artful Drunktective » Mon May 07, 2018 5:59 pm

Fish is basically a vegetable. - Old Smart Skunk
Something's got to be done. We can't go on like this.
I must have some booze. I demand to have some booze!- Withnail


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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by Nausea » Sat May 26, 2018 12:06 pm

"I'm just for real." -- oettinger
Oh God, my grandmother would kill me.

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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by ThirstyDrunk » Thu Sep 20, 2018 5:26 pm

"Predilection to sour mash don't make a man stupid."
To be fair, I'm drunker than you.

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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by Bur » Sat Sep 22, 2018 6:00 am

ThirstyDrunk wrote:
Thu Sep 20, 2018 5:26 pm
"Predilection to sour mash don't make a man stupid."
Way too deep for me.

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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by Nausea » Sun Sep 30, 2018 6:45 pm

"I still like beer." -- Brett Kavanaugh
Oh God, my grandmother would kill me.

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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by mistah willies » Mon Oct 01, 2018 1:30 am

Nausea wrote:
Sun Sep 30, 2018 6:45 pm
"I still like beer." -- Brett Kavanaugh
Everyone has a redeeming quality, don't they?
Given the opportunity to be under scrutiny by a bunch of old politicians for a lifetime appointment, I'd say fuck that unless there's a keg.

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Patchez
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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by Patchez » Mon Oct 01, 2018 11:29 pm

mistah willies wrote:
Mon Oct 01, 2018 1:30 am
Nausea wrote:
Sun Sep 30, 2018 6:45 pm
"I still like beer." -- Brett Kavanaugh
Everyone has a redeeming quality, don't they?
Given the opportunity to be under scrutiny by a bunch of old politicians for a lifetime appointment, I'd say fuck that unless there's a keg.
Wrong. He sucks. Also his yearbook lists him as a member of the Malibu Fan Club. No self respecting drunk drinks that shit unless there is nothing, this means mouthwash as well, left in the house. you sure as hell won't join it's fan club.
Now you're ready for some anti-dry-otics!-BeerMakesMeSmarter

If worms had daggers, birds wouldn't fuck with them-Todd Snider

Blackout and be extraordinary-Absinthe of Malice

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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by mistah willies » Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:53 am

Patchez wrote:
Mon Oct 01, 2018 11:29 pm
mistah willies wrote:
Mon Oct 01, 2018 1:30 am
Nausea wrote:
Sun Sep 30, 2018 6:45 pm
"I still like beer." -- Brett Kavanaugh
Everyone has a redeeming quality, don't they?
Given the opportunity to be under scrutiny by a bunch of old politicians for a lifetime appointment, I'd say fuck that unless there's a keg.
Wrong. He sucks. Also his yearbook lists him as a member of the Malibu Fan Club. No self respecting drunk drinks that shit unless there is nothing, this means mouthwash as well, left in the house. you sure as hell won't join it's fan club.
Indeed, he sucks. No excuse for assaulting anyone.
That's never under dispute here.

As far as a single redeeming quality, it's not that he was born into the richboy fratbro WASP entitlements and mentality.

No, it's this:
dude hung out with someone named "Squi"

Squi. Oh, the stories of Squi. That's friggin hilarious on a whole 'nother douchebag level.

MITCHELL: The entry says, and I quote, go to ‘Timmy’s for skis with Judge, Tom, P.J. Bernie and ... Squi?’

KAVANAUGH: Squi. It’s a nickname.


So what was Brett's nickname? I'll bet he was the nerd with money that they invited each time, and he sat in the corner writing in calendars and watching things, drinking by himself at parties, and then he sees an opportunity to meet a girl and unleashed his inner demon of anger, self-hatred and misogynist rapist tendencies.

But, Squi! That's sad and funny, that part.

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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by Dear Booze » Sat Oct 27, 2018 1:44 pm

When your cocktail decides to speak for you, don't interrupt. Just listen. It may say something profound.
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a drunk man tortilla chips, Velveeta and a hair dryer and he has nachos.

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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by mistah willies » Fri Dec 28, 2018 7:52 pm

"I think she could drink and smoke you under the table" --- some drunkard

"Everybody wins!" --- Badfellow

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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by Dear Booze » Sat Jan 12, 2019 11:15 pm

"It I shrinks my liver, doesn't it, Nat? It pickles my kidneys, yes. But what does it do to my mind? It tosses the sandbags overboard so the balloon can soar. Suddenly, I'm above the ordinary. I'm competent, supremely competent. I'm walking a tightrope over Niagara Falls. I'm one of the great ones. I'm Michelangelo, molding the beard of Moses. I'm Van Gogh, painting pure sunlight. I'm Horowitz, playing the Emperor Concerto. I'm John Barrymore before the movies got him by the throat. I'm Jesse James and his two brothers — all three of 'em. I'm W. Shakespeare. And out there it's not Third Avenue any longer: it's the Nile, Nat, the Nile — and down it moves the barge of Cleopatra."

~ Don Birnam, The Lost Weekend
Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a drunk man tortilla chips, Velveeta and a hair dryer and he has nachos.

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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by oettinger » Sun Jan 13, 2019 6:15 am

Dear Booze wrote:
Sat Jan 12, 2019 11:15 pm
"It I shrinks my liver, doesn't it, Nat? It pickles my kidneys, yes. But what does it do to my mind? It tosses the sandbags overboard so the balloon can soar. Suddenly, I'm above the ordinary. I'm competent, supremely competent. I'm walking a tightrope over Niagara Falls. I'm one of the great ones. I'm Michelangelo, molding the beard of Moses. I'm Van Gogh, painting pure sunlight. I'm Horowitz, playing the Emperor Concerto. I'm John Barrymore before the movies got him by the throat. I'm Jesse James and his two brothers — all three of 'em. I'm W. Shakespeare. And out there it's not Third Avenue any longer: it's the Nile, Nat, the Nile — and down it moves the barge of Cleopatra."

~ Don Birnam, The Lost Weekend
I love his ode to vodka
I do not remember posting that ^^^
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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by oettinger » Sat Jan 19, 2019 5:04 pm

Shit people don`t know shit life!

- A visibly intoxicated AD
I do not remember posting that ^^^
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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by Artful Drunktective » Sun Jan 20, 2019 9:15 am

^ ^ ^ Uh... I don't think that's verbatim but ok...?
Something's got to be done. We can't go on like this.
I must have some booze. I demand to have some booze!- Withnail


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Re: Drinking Quotes

Post by ThirstyDrunk » Fri Feb 15, 2019 9:54 pm

"Only the hypocritical and the homosexual hate perky tits"
-James Madison
May 13, 1792
To be fair, I'm drunker than you.

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