Some tiny child outside keeps shrieking and screaming incessantly and I feel like I have to constantly look outside to make sure everything is okay. I would think and hope after a couple of screams the parents should tell it to STFU because it's downright annoying. Maybe I should let my dog out to bark incessantly (as he's damn good at it) and see how they like it.
Unless it's recess time on the playground, children really shouldn't be allowed to be screaming anyway. I mean, how am I supposed to know if some day it gets kidnapped and I'll ignore its screams because it screams all the time like the Boy Who Cried Wolf. Shit I'm over. Stupid parents. Annoying screaming "for no reason" children.
Things we're over...enough already!
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- Artful Drunktective
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Re: Things we're over...enough already!
Okole maluna!
- scream ale
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Re: Things we're over...enough already!
^^^Throw bricks at it. Give parent and child a reason to cry.
- Artful Drunktective
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Re: Things we're over...enough already!
^ ^ ^ Good idea. That or maybe I should invest in a blow dart gun. Hmmm... I could see that becoming useful in so many ways...
Okole maluna!
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Re: Things we're over...enough already!
I now have one of these fuckheads in my neighborhood too. There's a brother and sister who stay with their grandparents every day while their parents are at work. The girl is about 12 and the boy 10-ish. There are a lot of other kids in the neighborhood to play with and all of them are always outside doing kid stuff. But here are the issues with the two subjest kids:Artful Drunktective wrote: ↑Sun Jun 13, 2021 10:27 amSome tiny child outside keeps shrieking and screaming incessantly and I feel like I have to constantly look outside to make sure everything is okay. I would think and hope after a couple of screams the parents should tell it to STFU because it's downright annoying. Maybe I should let my dog out to bark incessantly (as he's damn good at it) and see how they like it.
Unless it's recess time on the playground, children really shouldn't be allowed to be screaming anyway. I mean, how am I supposed to know if some day it gets kidnapped and I'll ignore its screams because it screams all the time like the Boy Who Cried Wolf. Shit I'm over. Stupid parents. Annoying screaming "for no reason" children.
-The boy is constantly screaming. Not crying, just screaming like a fucking girl.
-Both of them have bicycles and are constantly darting out into the road without looking. Mrs Booze and I have come close to hitting them on SEVERAL occasions. When we try to explain the value of looking out for cars, the look at us like we are retards.
-The boy is a bully to an 8-year-old who lives next door. I've had to tell him to knock it off on several occasions.
-Both kids talk about "having sex" while playing with the other kids. Not sure what that's about, but I'm pretty sure their parents are fucking those kids up for life.
-Both kids are ugly.
-The girl is fat.
-The grandparents never wave when we drive by - even when we wave at them.
-As much as I dislike those kids, we get a kick out of having them around because of the entertainment value; we enjoy a good slow-motion train wreck.
DRINK!
- scream ale
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Re: Things we're over...enough already!
Invest in a flamethrower. Barbecue in the summer is always awesome.Artful Drunktective wrote: ↑Sun Jun 13, 2021 10:38 am^ ^ ^ Good idea. That or maybe I should invest in a blow dart gun. Hmmm... I could see that becoming useful in so many ways...
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Re: Things we're over...enough already!
I have one, it's carved to look like a serpent, I bought it in JakartaArtful Drunktective wrote: ↑Sun Jun 13, 2021 10:38 am^ ^ ^ Good idea. That or maybe I should invest in a blow dart gun. Hmmm... I could see that becoming useful in so many ways...
- scream ale
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Re: Things we're over...enough already!
^^ Aim for the head!
Re: Things we're over...enough already!
For the overweight frenchfry cemetary shouldn`t it be called "fat-in-slow-motion"?
Drink!
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Re: Things we're over...enough already!
Wearing masks, social distancing and lockdowns. 'Nuff said!
Found myself in the Matrix and took the red pill. Now I want the blue pill and my bottle and leave me alone.
- Artful Drunktective
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- Artful Drunktective
- Chugging Like Churchill
- Posts: 5376
- Joined: Mon Mar 16, 2015 1:00 pm
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Re: Things we're over...enough already!
oett has one already stashed in the broom closet for when he is annoyed by German people having fun outside.scream ale wrote: ↑Sun Jun 13, 2021 11:52 amInvest in a flamethrower. Barbecue in the summer is always awesome.Artful Drunktective wrote: ↑Sun Jun 13, 2021 10:38 am^ ^ ^ Good idea. That or maybe I should invest in a blow dart gun. Hmmm... I could see that becoming useful in so many ways...
Okole maluna!
- Artful Drunktective
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Re: Things we're over...enough already!
Reminds me of my post from last summer in the Drinking Games thread. Sadly Paul isn't even the same kid as the screaming Nazi child.Dear Booze wrote: ↑Sun Jun 13, 2021 11:48 amI now have one of these fuckheads in my neighborhood too. There's a brother and sister who stay with their grandparents every day while their parents are at work. The girl is about 12 and the boy 10-ish. There are a lot of other kids in the neighborhood to play with and all of them are always outside doing kid stuff. But here are the issues with the two subjest kids:
-The boy is constantly screaming. Not crying, just screaming like a fucking girl.
-Both of them have bicycles and are constantly darting out into the road without looking. Mrs Booze and I have come close to hitting them on SEVERAL occasions. When we try to explain the value of looking out for cars, the look at us like we are retards.
-The boy is a bully to an 8-year-old who lives next door. I've had to tell him to knock it off on several occasions.
-Both kids talk about "having sex" while playing with the other kids. Not sure what that's about, but I'm pretty sure their parents are fucking those kids up for life.
-Both kids are ugly.
-The girl is fat.
-The grandparents never wave when we drive by - even when we wave at them.
-As much as I dislike those kids, we get a kick out of having them around because of the entertainment value; we enjoy a good slow-motion train wreck.
Artful Drunktective wrote: ↑Fri Aug 14, 2020 5:49 amEvery time we hear our neighbor's young son Paul cry, we now take a drink. And you can get pretty fecked up if you are drinking shaken lime daiquiris!
For whatever reason every time this kid is playing outside he inevitably cries and we've known this for ages. Blubbering more than once during the time he is out there too. Granted, he's four years old but damn! Usually it's some sort of injury. oett knows the father and even the dad said the poor kid runs awkwardly and can't stop and ultimately falls. Other times it's arguments with his older sister (who sounds like a German Louise from Bob's Burger's to make it more comical). Another time oett heard him crying because the parents were blaming him for something that he claims he didn't do. To make it worse, his helicopter mom always screams "PAUL!" ALL the freakin' time! We're exposed to all of this even more since we sit outside more often having drinks.
So that is how we came up with the drinking game "When Paul Cries". But the aforementioned "When Our Pomeranian Barks" gets ya way more fecked up since we spend 24-7 with that asshole. I feel sorry for our neighbors that live in between us because they are ALWAYS outside. Crying kid on one side...barky asshole dog on the other. Playing both drinking games in one day would be brutal!
You can improv this in your own neighborhood. If you live in the ghetto or near a fire station...why not drink to sirens? There's always a silver lining!
For those that Skyped with me in my pre-Deutschland days...y'all remember the circular saws, hedge trimmers, chainsaws, weed whackers...there was always some kind of annoying fcking sound occurring that could have easily became a drinking game.
Okole maluna!
Re: Things we're over...enough already!
LMAO at that Dear Booze post.
Don't worry. We're in no hurry.
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- Inebriate Savant
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Re: Things we're over...enough already!
beer flights just serve me a beer
- Artful Drunktective
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Re: Things we're over...enough already!
IKR? Picturing him observing everything going down especially.
Okole maluna!