YKYDW....

[Nausea]

You go to trim your mustache and accidentally extract a kidney.

[Nausea]

Your dental hygienist gets drunk off the vapors of your breath.

[oettinger]

You declared bloody war on the russian vodka bottles in your fridge

[oettinger]

You always get into trouble at border patrol because no one really belivies that you are actually Buzz Fuck from Wasteland

[oettinger]

You don`t really black out, your brain just leaves enough ram-space for future endeavors

[Nausea]

Your lips start to disintegrate a bit due to the sheer volume of hard liquor flowing over them.

[Nausea]

You met Death and bet your soul that you could drinker harder than anyone in history...

And you won.

[Badfellow]

You met Death and bet your soul that you could drinker harder than anyone in history...

And you won.

I dunno, man…

…the year was 1919, and one Frank "Booze Fucker" Wojozniak of Milwaukee, WI knew prohibition was coming. He started in Milwaukee on a Thursday morning and by Friday night he had worked his way down to Chicago drinking everything in his path.

400 national guard troops stationed at the Kentucky border did little to discourage Wojozniak as he mercilessly drank the living fuck out of one distillery after another. Old Grandad himself was quoted as saying "Christ almighty that fucker can drink. Run away."

[oettinger]

You watch youtube videos of frat boys downing whisky bottles for inspiration

[oettinger]

Your beer count says it`s noon, your whisky intake says it`s midnight. One is off...

[Badfellow]

When you drop your ham and cheese sandwich on the ground (it’s your meal for today), pick it up and eat it, then swish the grit out of your teeth with a pull off the neck of an EVARRRRCLEAR. Remorse is for tomorrow.

[Nausea]

When you drop your ham and cheese sandwich on the ground (it’s your meal for today), pick it up and eat it

Reminds me of jail.

[Badfellow]

Life is a jailbreak.

[oettinger]

Your pee is red, your poo is red, your couch is red. But when accidentially cut yourself it ouzing vodka

[Nausea]

You consider buying a view of Puss in Boots: The Last Wish on YouTube.