BADFELLOW FOR PRESIDENT

[drunkin' Wisconsinite]

I think it is a fantastic idea and I'm going to write him in. I'm sure he can deliver on the promise of a handle of bourbon in every kitchen. The White House could easily be converted to a low level dive bar on short order too. It certainly can't hurt. Who's with me?

[oettinger]

I am.

He`ll turn the whitehouse into barrell house. Non smoking areas hard to fínd. Air force one is his favorite brandy without the wings. Pentagon is a hard card game only drunks understand and the vice president has to collect all the empties after hes is shot before entering dallas. "Mrs Fellow, do you want your husbands ashes filled in his empty skull?"
"We lost all this brainpower..."
The assinator was Beer-Barley-Drinkwhalt, the Indepent Bureo of drink inflicted sudden suicides contemplated after a night long three week bender during the investigation.

[Frankennietzsche]

He's much too centrist for me.

[oettinger]

I dont like his anti christian juda muslim agenda



But and jihadism ans ghandi he said some very intelligent htings

[Patchez]

I'd vote for him. He's Pre-Med.

[ThirstyDrunk]

A handle. Sure that gets me through the night , then what?
I need a government that coddles me cradle to grave.

[Patchez]

Yeah. Where does this Bad Fellow stand on helping drunks stay drunk?

And how are we gonna tax the uppwr 10 % to keep us in hooch.

[Patchez]

I think it would go something like this.

[Badfellow]

Oh, the horror.

[oettinger]

Oh, the horror.

Don`t be shy, you`ve been a sexed up Theatcher-Nixon clone on anphetamines containing a ZID whirl with a slight hooch overdose from the beginning of drink

[drunkin' Wisconsinite]

Time to start thinking about your cabinet members and dust off the disco ball for Air Force one

[ThirstyDrunk]

RIGHT! Hey man you don't have to know everything just get a good group of advisers and you'll be set.

[Badfellow]

Time to start thinking about your cabinet members and dust off the disco ball for Air Force one

If elected, I will not post a cabinet. Instead, we'll just hang out and shoot the shit, maybe invite Putin over for Buffalo Trace and 5 Card Stud and tell him "dude, you really need to chill the fuck out". Drink some sense into that uptight Slavic mofo. That, friends, is how we roll on foreign policy.

As for the White House, I am firmly committed to making that crib the sleaziest, scummiest, most skanktastic drinking hole you've ever passed out in. The Oval Office shall henceforth be known as the Oh No You Didn't Office. The Lincoln Bedroom will be converted to an opium den. And the American flag will be changed to pizza.

I dont like his anti christian juda muslim agenda

Clearly, you must be one of the terrorists.

Yeah. Where does this Bad Fellow stand on helping drunks stay drunk?

An excellent question. You'll be pleased to know that federal liquor taxes will be reduced to -1.5% for any American citizen who is not a dickhead. Also, if you incur any large bar tabs, just tell the bartender that the EU said they'd pick up the damage. We can also steal China's credit cards and go on a shopping spree at the liquor store. It's all part of a sound fiscal policy.


I should also remind you, my fellow Drunkard citizens, according to TIme Magazine, it is not illegal to cast your vote while drunk. That's assuming you don't blow chunks all over the ballot.

[drunkin' Wisconsinite]

before you convert the Lincoln Bedroom to the opium den, I have some business to take care of in there with one of your interns. Assuming you'll invite me over of course.....

[Badfellow]

Yes, we all have some badness- er, I mean, business to take care of with those sassy, ivy league interns.

Er, I mean, "I did not have sexual relations with that woman."