Timeline of events (sort of): 6:15pm (20/08)- 11:25am(21/08)

[redshift]

I know, you've heard similar stories before, so nothing special. But just wanted to share last nite's events, since it's been a while I posted anything decent here.


Since I am really shit at telling a decent story, being an engineer by training, here is an approx.timeline of events (as recalled, I think):

20/08/10 (Friday):

06:15pm: Cracked open my first beer; go through the huge pile of mail which I’ve been putting off for a week now. Open the cable/internet bill. Yes, Comcast fucked it up again, third time in less than 8 months. The thought of having to deal with their idiotic customer service AGAIN only serves to increase the speed of drinking.

06:30pm: Do my first shot (a Beam Black) of the evening, chase it down with the Molson. The XXX stuff has about 7.4% alc. content, I am already starting to feel the effect, having an empty stomach doesn’t help either. Had just a half sandwich since I woke up, massive amounts of caffeine and cola during the day. Decide to clean up the garage a bit, it’s full of crap, I need to make some place for next weekend to help pull a transmission for a friend.

07:30pm: Decide to make some spicy tacos and burritos. I had picked up some El Paso stuff a while ago, never got around to making them. Crack open another beer to celebrate the idea. Followed by another shot, of course. Answer a few calls on the phone from my buddies, asking what I was upto. Tell them of my magnificent plan, regret it instantly. It’s probably a good thing I don’t work for the C.I.A, would be very easy to get stuff out of me. (Drink count: Beers – 3; Shots – 2)

07:45pm: Add too much hot sauce into the pan. But again, you can never have enough hot sauce in your food. Look at my cell phone, realize I have 3 missed calls and 2 txts from the GF. Yes, I was rocking out to some new music I downloaded from iTunes. How can a guy cook with out listening to music and drinking a beer? That’s the ONLY way I can.

08:20pm: Called back the girl, pissed her off (I think). Phew! Why don’t girls understand that we don’t have to answer every single one of their calls and texts, every single time? Well, the food is almost done. Finish off the beer, open the Chardonnay. (Drink count: Beers – 4; Shots – 2)

08:30pm: Yes, there is such a thing as too much hot sauce. 3 ice cubes, 2 Hershey’s, 1 shot of Beam later, I am still red as a lobster (didn’t think such a thing was possible, since I am half brown), my tongue feels like it’s on fire, I am sweating like a pig, while sitting directly in front of the AC vents. Mmmmmm….sloooooow burn is awesome!

09:15pm: Sufficiently cooled down having drunk 2 glasses of the white wine, I think it’s a good idea to do some drunk driving. Head down to the basement, fire up the Wii. I think I am the greatest Nintendo Kart driver in the world. 10 mins later, I actually think I am the worst. Even a spastic monkey hopped up on LSD can drive better than me at this point of time. Decide to celebrate the revelation by doing another shot. (Drink count: Beers – 4; Shots – 4; White wine – 3; )

09:40pm: Some of my idiot friends decide to roll in. Apparently, the news of my plan spread around a bit, they wanted to help me inflict more pain. I wanted tonight to be a quiet bender (if you can call it that), but now they even setup an invite up on Facebook. Great! They also bring in two 30 packs of devil’s own beast, Nat Ice. Haven’t had that swill in over 6 months. It used to be part of daily diet when I was in college. I thought these idiots (and I) had grown up since graduation (haha, good thought). Oh well, someone has to help reduce the stock, those beers aren’t going to drink by themselves. Right? So cranked up the volume on the sound system, got on with it.
(Drink count: Beers – 5; Shots – 4; White wine – 4) -> This was the last drink tally of the evening. I have no hope in the hell of tracking anything after this point, especially since I started playing beer pong. Yes, I am a very mature 27yr old who acts very grown-up and is very professional.

12:30am: Someone rudely shoves me off the bed, while I was making out with a super-hot girl. Right, it was just a dream. I am a bit lost and hazy at this point, apparently I told my friends that I wanted to post something on some website. And while I was in the room, decided to take a small “rest.” And the said “friend” then decides to shove a shot of tequila and a can of the beast in my face. Yes, they really are my friends. I must have been really whacked, proceed to guzzle it down, just to show who was still the boss around this place.

Catch the second wind around this point, have absolutely no idea what happened after this point of time. I knew I went back to the garage to barge into the beer pong games and the ever increasing crowd in my backyard. Good thing I live sort of away from other houses, my next door neighbors are quite cool people. I have flashes of what happened after this point, hazy images. But I know that I was still up at about 3am, because I have this really weird habit of checking into my school’s student account from time to time, especially if I am still drunk. Long story, don’t ask. And it usually records the date and time you last login.


21/08/10 (Saturday):

11:25am: Well, do I really have to?

The End. Glad I got it out of the system (especially since, I’ve been travelling quite a bit lately), it’s been a while since I had a night-in drinking session of this magnitude. Now, excuse me while I find something make a Bloody Mary to kill this pounding.

p.s: For those of you worried about the single malt, don’t despair, it’s still safe in its packing. It’s too valuable for idiotic drinking, so hid it away to protect it from my friends and I.