Three Observations from Mexico

[Dear Booze]

There are three things I learned while in Mexico. First, the National Dress for women in Mexico is a Maternity Dress. It seems that half the female population is either pregnant or carrying around a newborn baby. This is not a cultural slight, but a simple observation from an outsider.

Second, although the Mexican male population still seems to really like the mustache, it’s not as popular as it used to be. Internationally, the popularity of mustaches is on a pretty steep 30-year decline. Of course, here in the States, the filthy hipsters recently decided that it would be hip to grow them. Not sure where that idea came from. Whatever. Either way, I’ve always thought that there are only four kinds of men who look good with a mustache: old cowboys, badasses, Spaniards, and porn stars. This reminds me of my one time proposed Masters thesis: "The Decline and Fall of the British Mustache." At the height of the British Empire, most of its public figures had some impressive facial hair. Lord Kitchener's mustache is the stuff of legend. The British Empire declined in almost exact proportion to the decline of its facial hair. Remember Anthony Eden's wispy little thing at the time of the Suez Crisis? Maybe there is a coincidence here.

These first two observations come together fairly well to support my thesis statement. According to a report by the National Population Council, "Mexico's successful birth control program, wrought by an unswerving national crusade launched in 1974, has achieved a little-discussed but immensely significant drop in population growth. Whereas women gave birth to an average of seven children in 1965, the average now is 2.5 children.”

So, fewer mustaches, fewer children. There’s something in that facial hair which makes men virile and manly.

But, you drunkards want to hear about observation number three: Raicilla. In Puerto Vallarta, there are a number of roadside vendors who sell a moonshine mezcal called Raicilla (rye-see-ya). From what I can determine, the process of making it seems exactly the same as tequila, but the source is not Blue Agave. Instead, they use Agave Lechuguilla. I don’t know much about it but the research I’ve done shows that it’s a little smaller in size than the Blue Agave plant. Now, I’m not sure why they call it Raicilla and not Mescal. Perhaps it’s a way to get around the restrictions on alcohol production and the related taxes? I’ve never seen this stuff in stores; I’ve only seen it sold on side streets located at the edge of town. It’s usually sold in recycled water bottles with a screw top.

But here’s the kicker. Although the quality of the drink is usually on the raw side – kind of like it needs to age a little longer – there’s something about it that’s pretty good. In many cases, this bathtub booze is far better than the swill that some of the local tequila manufacturers try to pass off to the inexperienced tourists.

Do any of you have any experience with this stuff?

[mistah willies]

Never tried that but interested. Blue Agave Tequila is my forbidden fruit. Maybe her cuzzin, this Raicilla, well, maybe she will treat me even dirtier.