The Cock-eyed Caucasus

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oettinger
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Re: The Cock-eyed Caucasus

Post by oettinger »

My friend Joe just said that armenian brandy must be to notch.

Pay that prostitute, she`s worth it
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Badfellow
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Re: The Cock-eyed Caucasus

Post by Badfellow »

Saw some lovely photographs of the old dillywonker looking like a kid fresh out of the candy store in front of the Ararat Distillery. And some beautiful looking amber to chocolate colored brandy being swirled about in snifters. I can only imagine the heady pleasures Armenia has to offer, and I'm not just talking about the prostitutes.
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TheDrunkardAnglo
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Re: The Cock-eyed Caucasus

Post by TheDrunkardAnglo »

Day 14

The last full day in Yerevan Armenia and the last full day in the regions between the Black Sea and the Caspian Sea we call the Caucuses. Defined by the mountains spreading across this landscape. It is the wall between Eastern Europe and Western Asia. Though, now to me, I must say it means much more.

I feel great melancholy to be leaving tomorrow. I have drank with Armenians, Azerbaijanis, Georgians and a lot of Russians. They're all good people. It saddens me the only incident of the trip was caused by a fellow Englishman. What a sorry state of affairs.

I leave convinced this often forgotten region will soon, with the help of direct flights from EU nations, quickly become a budget-friendly and exciting alternative to French wine and brandy producing regions. Or perhaps even the hiking spots of the alps and pyrenees.

Now this polemic is over let me tell you about our day. We awake not too bad. Our first mission is to get a bag to fill with brandy. We first try a shop near our Apartment. They quote £60. I explain we were looking for closer to £10. I think they thought I was joking. I wasn't. We leave. We get a Yanex, the Russian equivalent to Uber, to some dingy shopping centre in the outskirts of Yerevan. We find a bag for £6. We take it.

We walk up the cascades to the monument celebrating 50 years of the Soviet Republic of Armenia. On the other side we see the entrance to Victory Park and in the distance the Mother of Armenia, a statue that replaced one of Joseph Stalin following Nikita Khrushchev's de-stalinization. These monuments and parks though popular with locals and tourists alike, have fallen close to ruin. Armenia is the one nation in the Caucuses that feels most comfortable with their history in the Soviet Union and their relationship to Russia, and yet it seems their Soviet sights are the closest to ruin.

We walk back down the cascades and stop at a bar and restaurant to have a few beers and some dinner. It's a moment of reflection as our travels are coming to close. We reflect on this adventure, past adventures and future adventures.

We then go to the Ararat Factory. Its a short Yanex ride away. The building itself is iconic. I suspect early Soviet Union. The writing is on top it says "Ararat" with Russian and Armenian text below. We go in, pay for our tickets and we're taken through the process of how they make Ararat. Sadly Ararat is no longer independent, and actually owned by the Pinod group and as a result the tour was more commercialised than I had hoped. The message "drink sensibly" plastered all over the place. Though the guide, was passionate and if it weren't for a few of the Iranians also on the tour it would have been even better.

We went through the whole process. From cognac making, to barrel making, to ageing. Finished going through the room of Presidents; when presidents of nations go to the Ararat Factory they have a barrel dedicated for their visit. There were no American  Presidents or British Prime Ministers I'm sad to report. Though they're very happy that George Clooney has been a couple of times.

Then to the brandy tasting, they take us to some corporate hospitality type room, I was hoping it would have been among the barrels. Sadly though the fumes from the barrels are supposedly too strong to allow this to happen. Still, "let me in you cowards!" I plead. They put three glasses in front of us 10 year old, 15 year old and 20 year old. Lots of classic bollocks like using your left hand as its closest to your heart type shit.

Anyway we sample. For my tastes the 15 year old was the nicest. The 20 year old was too smooth, too sweet, and most importantly too expensive. The 15 year old had the toasty notes, had caramel notes and a subtle burn. The 10 year old had the fruity notes and still a subtle burn.

We then head to the shop. Customs only allow us to bring 8 litres into the country without declaring. We achieve this.

My view from the sampling and drinking on a night out is that Ararat is some of the finest brandy in the world. Maybe even better than some cognacs. Then again what do I know... I've been spending two weeks beating probable prostitutes away with a shitty stick!


This is the end of the saga of the Cock-eyed Caucuses my Battered Brothers (and sisters) of Bacchus. Thank you for following along as I attempted to retell the events that had taken place. I hope at the very least it provided you something to chuckle at over a stern drink.
Major Strasser: What is your nationality?
Rick: I'm a drunkard.
Captain Renault: That makes Rick a citizen of the world.

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Dear Booze
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Re: The Cock-eyed Caucasus

Post by Dear Booze »

TheDrunkardAnglo wrote:
Tue Mar 29, 2022 9:10 am
...This is the end of the saga of the Cock-eyed Caucuses my Battered Brothers (and sisters) of Bacchus. Thank you for following along as I attempted to retell the events that had taken place. I hope at the very least it provided you something to chuckle at over a stern drink.
I've enjoyed this very much. Thank you for being such a brilliant guide and for allowing us along for the ride.
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Patchez
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Re: The Cock-eyed Caucasus

Post by Patchez »

Now I have to find some Ararat.
Now you're ready for some anti-dry-otics!-BeerMakesMeSmarter

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Nausea
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Re: The Cock-eyed Caucasus

Post by Nausea »

You're a rat?
Don't worry. We're in no hurry.

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Badfellow
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Re: The Cock-eyed Caucasus

Post by Badfellow »

And an epic journey it was. Many thanks for sharing the details; bloody hell, you should go-pro this stuff and edit yourself a video series. Good travels and godspeed back to the merry ol’ UK.
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oettinger
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Re: The Cock-eyed Caucasus

Post by oettinger »

Absolutely fantastic,

George Clooney left a bitter taste in my mouth tough, he`s hollywood dumb woke, fuck him

Who`s idea was this anyway? Your`s?
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