“What’s Norwegian for Daddy?”, “Daddy” she replied

[TheDrunkardAnglo]

So it all started on Saturday, I had tickets for a whisky festival. It was forty quid, but you got unlimited samples. I left very intoxicated.

My cousin had been at the Crystal Palace game and we met after for some Ghanaian food and drinks. We started in one pub and then we went to the next. At the next pub we met a group of Americans from Utah, one was a former Mormon missionary turned atheist. They were accompanied by a Norwegian girl.

We went to the railway telegraph, before getting in the uber, I had already more or less sealed the deal with the Norwegian. She wasn’t the best, but I was very horny. We got to the railway telegraph and we realised she had left her bag somewhere. We got an uber back to the pub and they didn’t have it so we went back to mine to fuck before going back to the railway telegraph.

Enroute back to mine I asked “What’s Norwegian for Daddy?”, “Daddy” she replied. This disappointed me quite a lot. I was expecting something like “Pappa” or “Pappi”, but sadly dear reader it’s just “Daddy”. We fucked.

We went back to the Railway telegraph. My cousin was going, so I reluctantly exchanged numbers and parted ways. Sadly for me my cousin had got in his uber and was already halfway home. One of her friends caught me before I could flee.

I went back inside. Karaoke was ensuing. Her friend tells me if she wasn’t married she would join us in a threesome. That threesome never happened dear reader. They sang a song, the lyrics were “strumming my pain with his fingers”. Fuck, I thought, she’s going to try to get back to mine.

Her friend gets an uber back to their hotel. The Norwegian returns with me back to mine. We fuck again then we go to sleep. I’m awoken by her snoring at around 5.00. Fuck sake its loud.

The Australian Grand Prix starts at 6.00 I stay up for that. I set two alarms one for 7.00, and the next at 7.30. Hopefully, she wakes up and gets the hint to fuck off. She sleeps through both alarms. At 8.00 I wake her up, we have some morning sex, I make coffee, and then I as politely as I can encourage her to get dressed and go.

I throw out some crap about work and walk her to the station. She wants me to meet her at her hotel tonight.
I will not be going to her hotel that evening dear reader.

[oettinger]

You freaking Casanova

[Nausea]

What's Norwegian for "manslut"?

[Badfellow]

What's Norwegian for "manslut"?

Mannludder. A complete and utter Britisk mannludder.

[Patchez]

The tragic mistake you made was letting her know where you lived. Rookie.

[Badfellow]

Looking forward to his next travel blog: "VD in Vietnam".