"bernies bar best bloody marys in town, NOT A PLACE FOR SINGLE POOR GIRLS, THE NIGHT BARTENDER WILL KICK YOU OUT FOR "SOLICTING A DRINK, OR CIGARETTES"!!!AND IF YOU DO GO, ASK WHO THEIR BOYFRIEND IS, SO YOU WONT "HIT UP ON THEM"!!!" - by tracy carlucci
Think I'll have to visit this shanty..
Bernie's Bar review:
Moderators: Artful Drunktective, mistah willies, NYDingbat, Judge, oettinger, Oggar, Badfellow, Mr Boozificator
- fiyah
- Drinking Like W.C.
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Bernie's Bar review:
22:21 Thirsty i was too drunk to be high
[13:22] <@Veen> I need to find the penis monster
[23:03] <@fabric> dont masturbate to me
[13:22] <@Veen> I need to find the penis monster
[23:03] <@fabric> dont masturbate to me
- ThirstyDrunk
- Juicing Like Jackie
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- Location: Xenia
- Jiggers McCoy
- Inebriate Savant
- Posts: 891
- Joined: Wed Jan 13, 2010 6:41 pm
- Location: Tampa
Re: Bernie's Bar review:
Nah, single rich girls are where it's at.
• "Avoiding the darker alcohols like bourbon, red wine and dark rum might lessen [a hangover] and you might also dance better if you wear a tutu instead of trousers." - FKR
• "If you wanna 'talk about' my drinking, it better be about how fucking awesome it is." - Me
• "If you wanna 'talk about' my drinking, it better be about how fucking awesome it is." - Me
- Wingman
- Chugging Like Churchill
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- Joined: Fri Feb 27, 2009 1:44 pm
- Location: on my way to a bar
Re: Bernie's Bar review:
if her daddy's rich, take her out for a meal.
if her daddy's poor, just do what you feel.
if her daddy's poor, just do what you feel.
Stupid should hurt.
"We're better than mere people, we're DRUNKARDS."
--ThirstyDrunk
"We're better than mere people, we're DRUNKARDS."
--ThirstyDrunk
Re: Bernie's Bar review:
Classy guy, you be.Wingman wrote:if her daddy's rich, take her out for a meal.
if her daddy's poor, just do what you feel.
- peetie44
- Juicing Like Jackie
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- Location: Belgium, Austin TX, SoCal, Branson MO, Cape Cod MA
Re: Bernie's Bar review:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B_E8OpX2At4Bur wrote:Classy guy, you be.Wingman wrote:if her daddy's rich, take her out for a meal.
if her daddy's poor, just do what you feel.
"Man i once bought $101 worth of insect candy because it was free shipping on orders over 100 bucks." -- ThirstyDrunk
"I wanted a shark high on crack dumped into a piranha tank! I wanted college AD's to pull their human faces off, then dive at each other's lizard throats!" -- waahoohah
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q01p7k6T ... e=youtu.be
"I wanted a shark high on crack dumped into a piranha tank! I wanted college AD's to pull their human faces off, then dive at each other's lizard throats!" -- waahoohah
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q01p7k6T ... e=youtu.be
- Wingman
- Chugging Like Churchill
- Posts: 5078
- Joined: Fri Feb 27, 2009 1:44 pm
- Location: on my way to a bar
Re: Bernie's Bar review:
"we're not dirty, we're not mean.peetie44 wrote: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B_E8OpX2At4
we love everybody, but we do as we please."
it's like he had savannah in mind....
"in the summer, we go fishin', or go swimming in the sea...."
Stupid should hurt.
"We're better than mere people, we're DRUNKARDS."
--ThirstyDrunk
"We're better than mere people, we're DRUNKARDS."
--ThirstyDrunk
- Two Hearted
- Drunker Than God
- Posts: 2055
- Joined: Tue Dec 09, 2008 2:54 pm
- Location: North of Nowhere
Re: Bernie's Bar review:
"Have a Pall Mall, Honey."
The cabin sits shut-down, cold-frozen and empty, dead mice in the traps, waiting for me to drink alone there in the dark.
--Smatter
--Smatter
- Badfellow
- Juicing Like Jackie
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- Location: Republic of Drunkardia
Re: Bernie's Bar review:
"Pa, yer crushin my smokes!"
ພາສາລາວNONE GENUINE WITHOUT MY SIGNATUREພາສາລາວ
- DeeboCools
- King Cockeyed
- Posts: 1888
- Joined: Wed Apr 09, 2008 10:37 pm
- Location: Maryland
Re: Bernie's Bar review:
don't know what kind of old-timey shit is going on here but I can't wait to marry up and be a male gold-digger househusband. Seems like a good deal. I'd clean the whole house on beer and fix my wife a cocktail for when she got off and get started on dinner. Then I'd give myself to her. She makes all the money, after all. She could even knock me around a bit.
"S0briety diminishes, discriminates, and says no; drunkenness expands, unites, and says yes." -William James
- Mr Boozificator
- Boozing Like Bukowski
- Posts: 4981
- Joined: Sat Dec 12, 2009 6:28 pm
Re: Bernie's Bar review:
THAT does make sense.DeeboCools wrote:don't know what kind of old-timey shit is going on here but I can't wait to marry up and be a male gold-digger househusband. Seems like a good deal. I'd clean the whole house on beer and fix my wife a cocktail for when she got off and get started on dinner. Then I'd give myself to her. She makes all the money, after all. She could even knock me around a bit.
"I never want to go to bed if there are still beers in the fridge, but then I am always hopeful that there are beers left in there when I wake up.". Thirstydrunk.
"We all look for happiness, but without knowing where to find it: like drunkards who look for their house, knowing dimly that they have one." Voltaire
"The prince of darkness is a gentleman." Shakespeare.
"We all look for happiness, but without knowing where to find it: like drunkards who look for their house, knowing dimly that they have one." Voltaire
"The prince of darkness is a gentleman." Shakespeare.
- Judge
- Moderator
- Posts: 7725
- Joined: Sun Jun 08, 2003 11:01 pm
- Location: Can't find my ass with two hands
Re: Bernie's Bar review:
I don't doubt your sincere intent. However as I read your proffered skills I have this scene running through my noggin:DeeboCools wrote:don't know what kind of old-timey shit is going on here but I can't wait to marry up and be a male gold-digger househusband. Seems like a good deal. I'd clean the whole house on beer and fix my wife a cocktail for when she got off and get started on dinner. Then I'd give myself to her. She makes all the money, after all. She could even knock me around a bit.
"I'd clean the whole house on beer"- I'll get up at 11, grab a beer, fuck off on the intertron for an hour, empty the kitchen garbage because it smells. Find some food. Take a nap. Have more beer and realize its close to 3. Shove the dishes in the washer and run about 'straightening' things, run the vacuum around the front room to make some tracks that are noticeable. At 3:15 feeling good about myself, take off to the grocery and buy a frozen lasagna and bag of salad. Now that I've taken care of dinner treat myself to time at the local for some well deserved commarderie. After a few beers or 5 amble on home and dump the half defrosted lasagne in the oven.
"Fix my wife a cocktail":
She comes home and I pour her a glass of wine from last chardonnay in the house because I didn't get around to buying more when I was laying in another 3 30 packs.
"then I give myself to her"
Putting on my best Rico Suave moves I drop my board shorts on the carpet by the unemptied cat box and tell her 'hey baby, over here...you've earned it". She strides across the room unfortunately meeting my shoes left in the middle of the room, stumbling a bit and makes a seemingly disparaging comment about my lack of visible evidence of being able to 'rock her world'.
My clumsy left hand grab to her right breast runs wide and I end up slapping the cheap wine out of her hand and fall over backwards hitting my head on the base of the coffee table. Then as promised she "even knocks me around a bit." Well maybe more than a bit. But then I rarely remember the next morning when she's off to work and I'm thinking I should stay in bed a bit longer to soothe this throbber of a headache.
I really should clean the kitchen.
Proverbs 31:6&7
"Pain is sometimes the price of laughter."-Oggar
CPE1704TKS
"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane"-Marcus Aurelius
And afterwords we can run amok! Or if you're too tired, we can walk amok.
"Pain is sometimes the price of laughter."-Oggar
CPE1704TKS
"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane"-Marcus Aurelius
And afterwords we can run amok! Or if you're too tired, we can walk amok.
- Two Hearted
- Drunker Than God
- Posts: 2055
- Joined: Tue Dec 09, 2008 2:54 pm
- Location: North of Nowhere
Re: Bernie's Bar review:
I laughed out loud. Well done.Judge wrote:I don't doubt your sincere intent. However as I read your proffered skills I have this scene running through my noggin:DeeboCools wrote:don't know what kind of old-timey shit is going on here but I can't wait to marry up and be a male gold-digger househusband. Seems like a good deal. I'd clean the whole house on beer and fix my wife a cocktail for when she got off and get started on dinner. Then I'd give myself to her. She makes all the money, after all. She could even knock me around a bit.
"I'd clean the whole house on beer"- I'll get up at 11, grab a beer, fuck off on the intertron for an hour, empty the kitchen garbage because it smells. Find some food. Take a nap. Have more beer and realize its close to 3. Shove the dishes in the washer and run about 'straightening' things, run the vacuum around the front room to make some tracks that are noticeable. At 3:15 feeling good about myself, take off to the grocery and buy a frozen lasagna and bag of salad. Now that I've taken care of dinner treat myself to time at the local for some well deserved commarderie. After a few beers or 5 amble on home and dump the half defrosted lasagne in the oven.
"Fix my wife a cocktail":
She comes home and I pour her a glass of wine from last chardonnay in the house because I didn't get around to buying more when I was laying in another 3 30 packs.
"then I give myself to her"
Putting on my best Rico Suave moves I drop my board shorts on the carpet by the unemptied cat box and tell her 'hey baby, over here...you've earned it". She strides across the room unfortunately meeting my shoes left in the middle of the room, stumbling a bit and makes a seemingly disparaging comment about my lack of visible evidence of being able to 'rock her world'.
My clumsy left hand grab to her right breast runs wide and I end up slapping the cheap wine out of her hand and fall over backwards hitting my head on the base of the coffee table. Then as promised she "even knocks me around a bit." Well maybe more than a bit. But then I rarely remember the next morning when she's off to work and I'm thinking I should stay in bed a bit longer to soothe this throbber of a headache.
I really should clean the kitchen.
The cabin sits shut-down, cold-frozen and empty, dead mice in the traps, waiting for me to drink alone there in the dark.
--Smatter
--Smatter
- fiyah
- Drinking Like W.C.
- Posts: 6778
- Joined: Fri Apr 07, 2006 4:04 pm
- Location: Boozing Bodhisattva
- Contact:
Re: Bernie's Bar review:
Judge wrote:I don't doubt your sincere intent. However as I read your proffered skills I have this scene running through my noggin:DeeboCools wrote:don't know what kind of old-timey shit is going on here but I can't wait to marry up and be a male gold-digger househusband. Seems like a good deal. I'd clean the whole house on beer and fix my wife a cocktail for when she got off and get started on dinner. Then I'd give myself to her. She makes all the money, after all. She could even knock me around a bit.
"I'd clean the whole house on beer"- I'll get up at 11, grab a beer, fuck off on the intertron for an hour, empty the kitchen garbage because it smells. Find some food. Take a nap. Have more beer and realize its close to 3. Shove the dishes in the washer and run about 'straightening' things, run the vacuum around the front room to make some tracks that are noticeable. At 3:15 feeling good about myself, take off to the grocery and buy a frozen lasagna and bag of salad. Now that I've taken care of dinner treat myself to time at the local for some well deserved commarderie. After a few beers or 5 amble on home and dump the half defrosted lasagne in the oven.
"Fix my wife a cocktail":
She comes home and I pour her a glass of wine from last chardonnay in the house because I didn't get around to buying more when I was laying in another 3 30 packs.
"then I give myself to her"
Putting on my best Rico Suave moves I drop my board shorts on the carpet by the unemptied cat box and tell her 'hey baby, over here...you've earned it". She strides across the room unfortunately meeting my shoes left in the middle of the room, stumbling a bit and makes a seemingly disparaging comment about my lack of visible evidence of being able to 'rock her world'.
My clumsy left hand grab to her right breast runs wide and I end up slapping the cheap wine out of her hand and fall over backwards hitting my head on the base of the coffee table. Then as promised she "even knocks me around a bit." Well maybe more than a bit. But then I rarely remember the next morning when she's off to work and I'm thinking I should stay in bed a bit longer to soothe this throbber of a headache.
I really should clean the kitchen.
My first ever nomination for All-Star post..
22:21 Thirsty i was too drunk to be high
[13:22] <@Veen> I need to find the penis monster
[23:03] <@fabric> dont masturbate to me
[13:22] <@Veen> I need to find the penis monster
[23:03] <@fabric> dont masturbate to me