Employment advice?
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Re: Employment advice?
I work in IT (Sysadmin) and highly recommended it due to its soul-killing qualities. Drives you to drink, you see.
*hic*
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- Drinking God's Good Scotch
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Re: Employment advice?
Dig ditches. Clean pools. Deliver high-end pizza i.e. flat-bread goat cheese & cocaine pies. Chicks think it's hot.
Avoid leaf-blowing and lawn-mowing and selling oranges near on-ramps. Not so hot.
Watch porn for additional occupational advice.
Good luck.
Avoid leaf-blowing and lawn-mowing and selling oranges near on-ramps. Not so hot.
Watch porn for additional occupational advice.
Good luck.
"Please welcomce in all his diluted glory the man whose story writes itself not unlike mine who feveriously types awaiting his next sip before the whipping, anticiapation is making me want to strangle someone." ~whiskyprick
- Frankennietzsche
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Re: Employment advice?
Get a warehouse job. Forklifts are fun. Sales isn't that much fun, which is what I am mostly doing right now.
Everywhere you go, though, you have to take some type of bite of the giant shit sandwich. It's mostly a matter of how much you can stomache.
Everywhere you go, though, you have to take some type of bite of the giant shit sandwich. It's mostly a matter of how much you can stomache.
“Süßen witwe Mutter-Hosen — kommst du hier mit mein knackenpfeife schnell, oder Ich zeige Ihnen mein Zuhälter Hand!”
"I am going to pistol-whip the next person who says 'shenanigans' "
"Rectum? It nearly killed him!"
"I am going to pistol-whip the next person who says 'shenanigans' "
"Rectum? It nearly killed him!"
Re: Employment advice?
Work for the Fed. It will quickly relieve you of any fraction of a soul you may have left.
"making the world a more disturbing place for over half a century"
- BBoozer
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Re: Employment advice?
Get a fuckin' engineerin' degree. Do DIY on a saturday morning. Watch mind numbin' game shows with your kids at night. Grow up. Grow the fuck up. Grow a pair, Steve, and get yourself whatever job's on offer.
- Glasgae Sam
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Re: Employment advice?
I spent 6 months out of work last year, and grabbed the first job which sounded vaguely interesting. I've now been there almost a year, and actually really like it. I work on contracts to rent excavators and other heavy construction equipment, which means a good chunk of my day is taken up learning about new and impressively BIG machinery. Before this I was a lawyer. So my advice is to cast a wide net - just try stuff out, you never know what will stick :)
Let us have wine and women, mirth and laughter,
Sermons and soda water the day after.
www.drunchblog.com <- it's full of pictures of epic breakfasts made by me and my friends. That's about it.
Sermons and soda water the day after.
www.drunchblog.com <- it's full of pictures of epic breakfasts made by me and my friends. That's about it.
- Frankennietzsche
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Re: Employment advice?
I tells you: warehouse job. Especially if you are able to entertain yourself mentally. You don't have to think much, you can be as hung over, relatively, as people will just assume that you are "slow" or might not care if you are hungover. And, it's pretty universal once you have it on your resume, not that it's glamorous.
I like being stuck in the warehouse when they pull me off of sales. Hauling around 80 pound mufflers up and down stairs isn't easy, but it is as the same time.
I like being stuck in the warehouse when they pull me off of sales. Hauling around 80 pound mufflers up and down stairs isn't easy, but it is as the same time.
“Süßen witwe Mutter-Hosen — kommst du hier mit mein knackenpfeife schnell, oder Ich zeige Ihnen mein Zuhälter Hand!”
"I am going to pistol-whip the next person who says 'shenanigans' "
"Rectum? It nearly killed him!"
"I am going to pistol-whip the next person who says 'shenanigans' "
"Rectum? It nearly killed him!"
- waahoohah
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Re: Employment advice?
Listen to the man. He knows what he's talking about.FNZ wrote:Get a warehouse job. Forklifts are fun.
Do you know what an air pillow is? Think of bubble wrap, but each bubble is about the size of a burrito. Those are air pillows.
Now, imagine taking a strip of air pillows, laying them out on the floor, and running them over with a forklift.
That's right. It sounds a lot like a tommy gun, and is almost as loud.
"Beginner's luck is only possible if you try."
-Lee Harvey Oswald
-Lee Harvey Oswald
Re: Employment advice?
That makes learning to drive a forklift sound much more fun!waahoohah wrote:Listen to the man. He knows what he's talking about.FNZ wrote:Get a warehouse job. Forklifts are fun.
Do you know what an air pillow is? Think of bubble wrap, but each bubble is about the size of a burrito. Those are air pillows.
Now, imagine taking a strip of air pillows, laying them out on the floor, and running them over with a forklift.
That's right. It sounds a lot like a tommy gun, and is almost as loud.
Yes, I'm easily pleased sometimes.
- greygoose
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Re: Employment advice?
you can't really expect a reasonable response without telling us what you skills are, no? other than that, you could search for universities doing studies on the affects of alcohol on the liver. i'd expect that that means free booze. or you could take the fnz path and have fun with forklifts.
why is my moral compass always pointed east? that's the direction of the nearest liquor store.
Re: Employment advice?
Does writing sarcastic blogs count as a skill?greygoose wrote:you can't really expect a reasonable response without telling us what you skills are, no? other than that, you could search for universities doing studies on the affects of alcohol on the liver. i'd expect that that means free booze. or you could take the fnz path and have fun with forklifts.
But seriously, my previous jobs have all been in accounts/ office admin, but with no formal qualifications or certificates. I have about ten years job experience, but skills? The last five or sx companies I did accounts for went bankrupt. So the word "skill" is stretching it a bit! I could give great advice on what NOT to do in business matters, because I've seen so many fail.
- waahoohah
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Re: Employment advice?
This. Listen to him, he speaks truth. I'm hungover, at work, hiding in a corner of our warehouse while I type this, and nobody cares.FNZ wrote:I tells you: warehouse job. Especially if you are able to entertain yourself mentally. You don't have to think much, you can be as hung over, relatively, as people will just assume that you are "slow" or might not care if you are hungover. And, it's pretty universal once you have it on your resume, not that it's glamorous.
I like being stuck in the warehouse when they pull me off of sales. Hauling around 80 pound mufflers up and down stairs isn't easy, but it is as the same time.
"Beginner's luck is only possible if you try."
-Lee Harvey Oswald
-Lee Harvey Oswald
- BenTheBeast
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Re: Employment advice?
Contract killing is a business always in need of new recruits...Relieve stress and waste people at the same time, it's a perfect combination.
Logic goes out the window when large sums of money are involved.
Everyone knows what the problems are, but fixing them would be a giant pain in the ass.
Everyone knows what the problems are, but fixing them would be a giant pain in the ass.
Re: Employment advice?
If I get to pick the victims, I'm sold on this one!BenTheBeast wrote:Contract killing is a business always in need of new recruits...Relieve stress and waste people at the same time, it's a perfect combination.
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Re: Employment advice?
what, you shoot my idea down from the get go? i still have a full orange tree in my back yard. i'm gonna do that. but on the employment advice, i would say hang around home depot and get hunert bucks a day for labor. apparently, you can speak ingles, which is a plus. mota, anyone?grippingthewheel wrote:Dig ditches. Clean pools. Deliver high-end pizza i.e. flat-bread goat cheese & cocaine pies. Chicks think it's hot.
Avoid leaf-blowing and lawn-mowing and selling oranges near on-ramps. Not so hot.Watch porn for additional occupational advice.
Good luck.