My good friend RIPT just told me...

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Frankennietzsche
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by Frankennietzsche »

My sometimes penpal, RIPT, told me that he likes to go to messageboards and pretend that he is a stripper so that mens will hit on him. It gets him hard without pills in the privacy of his own home."
“Süßen witwe Mutter-Hosen — kommst du hier mit mein knackenpfeife schnell, oder Ich zeige Ihnen mein Zuhälter Hand!”

"I am going to pistol-whip the next person who says 'shenanigans' "

"Rectum? It nearly killed him!"

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mistah willies
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by mistah willies »

My ole buddy Stinkshoe

wait, stink shoe always leaves a scent when you track him

or when you step in something he done left behind

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ThirstyDrunk
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by ThirstyDrunk »

I hear he's a squirter.
Like a desperate thirst in a raging drought

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mistah willies
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by mistah willies »

A long time ago, he. had no lady to love

She's told him things

and snapped on her purple glove

Now he's not alone,

She's got his bone

Marion and RIPT dance together in Ravenwood forever

Artfully

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Frankennietzsche
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by Frankennietzsche »

"Diesel says 'woof, that's sharp!'"
“Süßen witwe Mutter-Hosen — kommst du hier mit mein knackenpfeife schnell, oder Ich zeige Ihnen mein Zuhälter Hand!”

"I am going to pistol-whip the next person who says 'shenanigans' "

"Rectum? It nearly killed him!"

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Badfellow
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by Badfellow »

My best friend forever RIPT told me how his illegitimate daughter Riptina is now legal drinking age, and he's pretty upset she took a job as a cocktail skirt at one of those trucker strip joints out on the interstate. They were supposed to spend some family time trolling together this weekend.
ພາສາລາວNONE GENUINE WITHOUT MY SIGNATUREພາສາລາວ

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ThirstyDrunk
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by ThirstyDrunk »

I heard he recently acquired a new set of drapes, as the old ones were soiled. Just sayin'.
Like a desperate thirst in a raging drought

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Badfellow
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by Badfellow »

My good friend RIPT says Tide works great for getting the grease stains out of his bathrobe.
ພາສາລາວNONE GENUINE WITHOUT MY SIGNATUREພາສາລາວ

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Frankennietzsche
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by Frankennietzsche »

“Süßen witwe Mutter-Hosen — kommst du hier mit mein knackenpfeife schnell, oder Ich zeige Ihnen mein Zuhälter Hand!”

"I am going to pistol-whip the next person who says 'shenanigans' "

"Rectum? It nearly killed him!"

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DivaBitch
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by DivaBitch »

Badfellow wrote:My best friend forever RIPT told me how his illegitimate daughter Riptina is now legal drinking age, and he's pretty upset she took a job as a cocktail skirt at one of those trucker strip joints out on the interstate. They were supposed to spend some family time trolling together this weekend.
not a bad job if she can take shit from the gyus. she shuold make good tips if she looks good and flirts...as long as she don't get in to hooking
"If it feels good do it again, if it still feels good you're doing it right"
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Frankennietzsche
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by Frankennietzsche »

My old chum, RIPT, just tried to AIM me. He said that he is so giddy because today is Taylor Swift's 27th birthday.

Or, as he put it: "HOORAY FOR TAYTAY'S BIRTHDAY!!!!!"

He said that he tried to send me a .gif of himself cheering that with pompoms and everything.

He sure lorvves him some TayTay.
“Süßen witwe Mutter-Hosen — kommst du hier mit mein knackenpfeife schnell, oder Ich zeige Ihnen mein Zuhälter Hand!”

"I am going to pistol-whip the next person who says 'shenanigans' "

"Rectum? It nearly killed him!"

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mistah willies
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by mistah willies »

My stinky friend RIPt tried to reach me through Yahoo today, but he's pissed on some Ruskies. That makes them pissed off.

He PMSed me and said that he will teach them a lesson or two about things.

Maybe he'll freak them out, huh

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Frankennietzsche
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by Frankennietzsche »

My good feind RIPT was just musing that he has never met a woman named "Asia" who was Asian. THings that make you go "hmmm..."
“Süßen witwe Mutter-Hosen — kommst du hier mit mein knackenpfeife schnell, oder Ich zeige Ihnen mein Zuhälter Hand!”

"I am going to pistol-whip the next person who says 'shenanigans' "

"Rectum? It nearly killed him!"

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mistah willies
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by mistah willies »

Ole RIPt teletyped the Pentagon a couple days ago, and he said that he yearned for the innocent times of his youth when a spyship was spotted off the coast of California, back in '41.

He's such a card. He thinks he can get a response from anyone in power any more. No one tell him about the Yelp app. He'll never get off the toilet with his incessant Yelping.

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Frankennietzsche
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Re: My good friend RIPT just told me...

Post by Frankennietzsche »

Our favorite curmudgeon, RIPT, celebrates the 13th of March every year by purchasing a new posterior cork. Or so I have heard...
“Süßen witwe Mutter-Hosen — kommst du hier mit mein knackenpfeife schnell, oder Ich zeige Ihnen mein Zuhälter Hand!”

"I am going to pistol-whip the next person who says 'shenanigans' "

"Rectum? It nearly killed him!"

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