Top Tips for the Alcoholically Challenged
Moderators: Artful Drunktective, mistah willies, NYDingbat, Judge, oettinger, Oggar, Badfellow, Mr Boozificator
Re: advice!
Kegs are always great for bonfires.
Tequila says "fuck everything."
Tequila says "fuck everything."
The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.
GFYCMD- Go Fuck Yourself, Captain Mike Davis.
GFYCMD- Go Fuck Yourself, Captain Mike Davis.
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Wingman
- Chugging Like Churchill
- Posts: 5078
- Joined: Fri Feb 27, 2009 1:44 pm
- Location: on my way to a bar
Re: advice!
tequila does in fact say, "fuck everything." bourbon says, "can we fuck it? no? can we beat it up? well, then can we steal it? no? let's piss on it, then!"
Stupid should hurt.
"We're better than mere people, we're DRUNKARDS."
--ThirstyDrunk
"We're better than mere people, we're DRUNKARDS."
--ThirstyDrunk
Re: advice!
Bourbon is like the witty uncle. Tequila doesn't have a sense of humor.Wingman wrote:tequila does in fact say, "fuck everything." bourbon says, "can we fuck it? no? can we beat it up? well, then can we steal it? no? let's piss on it, then!"
The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist.
GFYCMD- Go Fuck Yourself, Captain Mike Davis.
GFYCMD- Go Fuck Yourself, Captain Mike Davis.
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Judge
- Moderator
- Posts: 7725
- Joined: Sun Jun 08, 2003 11:01 pm
- Location: Can't find my ass with two hands
Re: advice!
peach schnaaps
Proverbs 31:6&7
"Pain is sometimes the price of laughter."-Oggar
CPE1704TKS
"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane"-Marcus Aurelius
And afterwords we can run amok! Or if you're too tired, we can walk amok.
"Pain is sometimes the price of laughter."-Oggar
CPE1704TKS
"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane"-Marcus Aurelius
And afterwords we can run amok! Or if you're too tired, we can walk amok.
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Judge
- Moderator
- Posts: 7725
- Joined: Sun Jun 08, 2003 11:01 pm
- Location: Can't find my ass with two hands
Re: advice!
To be fair, yes, tequila. On my graduation as the graduates were marching onto the field (I was in the last line) I was in a VW bug with a few others downing a bottle of the devil's urine. My mother stated she knew I was drunk as we rand to catch up to our place in line.
Did I mention I got married the next day? Pfft, tequlia.
Did I mention I got married the next day? Pfft, tequlia.
Proverbs 31:6&7
"Pain is sometimes the price of laughter."-Oggar
CPE1704TKS
"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane"-Marcus Aurelius
And afterwords we can run amok! Or if you're too tired, we can walk amok.
"Pain is sometimes the price of laughter."-Oggar
CPE1704TKS
"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane"-Marcus Aurelius
And afterwords we can run amok! Or if you're too tired, we can walk amok.
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Mr Boozificator
- Boozing Like Bukowski
- Posts: 4980
- Joined: Sat Dec 12, 2009 6:28 pm
Re: advice!
Cognac, expensive cognac.
"I never want to go to bed if there are still beers in the fridge, but then I am always hopeful that there are beers left in there when I wake up.". Thirstydrunk.
"We all look for happiness, but without knowing where to find it: like drunkards who look for their house, knowing dimly that they have one." Voltaire
"The prince of darkness is a gentleman." Shakespeare.
"We all look for happiness, but without knowing where to find it: like drunkards who look for their house, knowing dimly that they have one." Voltaire
"The prince of darkness is a gentleman." Shakespeare.
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ThirstyDrunk
- Juicing Like Jackie
- Posts: 12701
- Joined: Sun Oct 08, 2006 10:35 pm
- Location: Xenia
Re: advice!
3 bottles of J. Roget champagnee, a case of Little Kings, and a plastic jug of cheap vodka.
Like a desperate thirst in a raging drought
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ruiner
- Ripped Like Reed
- Posts: 9065
- Joined: Sun Nov 30, 2003 8:14 pm
- Location: hell's ditch
- Contact:
Re: advice!
pyramid of cans down by the harbor. just don't go driving your blazer into parked mercedes, like someone i know did.
You see in this world there are two kinds of people, my friend. Those with loaded guns, and those who dig. You dig.
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Frankennietzsche
- Juicing Like Jackie
- Posts: 12348
- Joined: Mon Mar 17, 2003 9:13 pm
- Location: Master of the Meatloaf Winds
- Contact:
Re: advice!
Wait a minute! End of year? Highschool? Are you old enough to be on here?
“Süßen witwe Mutter-Hosen — kommst du hier mit mein knackenpfeife schnell, oder Ich zeige Ihnen mein Zuhälter Hand!”
"I am going to pistol-whip the next person who says 'shenanigans' "
"Rectum? It nearly killed him!"
"I am going to pistol-whip the next person who says 'shenanigans' "
"Rectum? It nearly killed him!"
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Savage
- Juicing Like Jackie
- Posts: 25434
- Joined: Mon Apr 21, 2003 1:16 am
- Location: All my bags are packed, I'm ready to go
Re: advice!
Oh my dear. My whole life since 1976 has been all about FUCK HIGH SCHOOL. (Actually, '72 to '76 were pretty much the same.) But this is not about me, so for you, I would recommend mass qantities of bourbon. Even the cheap stuff; gotta start somewhere, after all. Our little high school across the street (from which three of my little princessess's graduated) is a prison-like structure, so you would have to be oblivious to miss the symbolism. Every day, when I wake up, be it 7 a.m. or 12 noon, I am still grateful that I don't have to go to school. Old age has its privilege.
like tears in rain
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TheBigCasino
- Drinking Like W.C.
- Posts: 6456
- Joined: Fri Dec 12, 2003 7:02 am
- Location: the golden age.
- Contact:
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TheBigCasino
- Drinking Like W.C.
- Posts: 6456
- Joined: Fri Dec 12, 2003 7:02 am
- Location: the golden age.
- Contact:
Re: advice!
This is classic.Wingman wrote:tequila does in fact say, "fuck everything." bourbon says, "can we fuck it? no? can we beat it up? well, then can we steal it? no? let's piss on it, then!"
BMMS is wrong.
LoJ 917
WWDJFD?
LoJ 917
WWDJFD?