You'll never believe it, Bono haters!
After exhaustively searching the dark web, I was actually able to track down Bono's phone number! It's (904) 743-3727 when dialed from the US and Canada. But not Mexico.
Official Bono & U2 haters thread
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Re: Official Bono & U2 haters thread
ພາສາລາວNONE GENUINE WITHOUT MY SIGNATUREພາສາລາວ
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Re: Official Bono & U2 haters thread
Oh, sorry. That's Bono's BBQ Pit in Jacksonville, FL.
Watch, now they'll probably get sued by you-know-who for intellectual asshole infringement.
Watch, now they'll probably get sued by you-know-who for intellectual asshole infringement.
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Re: Official Bono & U2 haters thread
It'd be fun to call it in a Skype session and bust balls!
Or, "amazeballs"
?
.
Can we drink now? ---peetie44
At rock bottom, there is no down. ---The Oett
^ ^ ^ Yes his entire cutlery set and all utensils are made from assorted broken bottles.--- The Artful Detective
Just remember Hugh: a good cocktail in a shitty glass is better that a shitty cocktail in a pretty glass.---The Badfellow
I'll buy the first round if you promise to stop being a cunt. --- Dear Booze
At rock bottom, there is no down. ---The Oett
^ ^ ^ Yes his entire cutlery set and all utensils are made from assorted broken bottles.--- The Artful Detective
Just remember Hugh: a good cocktail in a shitty glass is better that a shitty cocktail in a pretty glass.---The Badfellow
I'll buy the first round if you promise to stop being a cunt. --- Dear Booze
Re: Official Bono & U2 haters thread
Can't we just hate them for starting out a punk wannabees and transitioning into the giant twatopotomases they reall are?
Now you're ready for some anti-dry-otics!-BeerMakesMeSmarter
If worms had daggers, birds wouldn't fuck with them-Todd Snider
Blackout and be extraordinary-Absinthe of Malice
If worms had daggers, birds wouldn't fuck with them-Todd Snider
Blackout and be extraordinary-Absinthe of Malice
Re: Official Bono & U2 haters thread
Robin Williams hated him too.
Now you're ready for some anti-dry-otics!-BeerMakesMeSmarter
If worms had daggers, birds wouldn't fuck with them-Todd Snider
Blackout and be extraordinary-Absinthe of Malice
If worms had daggers, birds wouldn't fuck with them-Todd Snider
Blackout and be extraordinary-Absinthe of Malice
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Re: Official Bono & U2 haters thread
"Amazeballs in awesome sauce," is what Bono of Nazareth said recently to starving children from the country of Afrika. "You kids are doing a real bangers and mashed up job here. From the richness and meaningful nature of my latest hit single, so to are you nourished, ya feckin' whelps."
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- Artful Drunktective
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- Artful Drunktective
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Re: Official Bono & U2 haters thread
This is from "back in tha day" a mere few years ago. Where the hell is FearNoBeer? We got to find this guy.
Hey strange that this post was almost to the anniversary day.
Re: Ask Savage
Post by Artful Drunktective » Tue May 10, 2016 11:40 am
Hey strange that this post was almost to the anniversary day.
Re: Ask Savage
Post by Artful Drunktective » Tue May 10, 2016 11:40 am
Artful Drunktective wrote: ↑Tue May 10, 2016 3:40 pmFearNoBeer wrote:Dear Savage,
Why is U2 so popular? After all they´ve got a really boring, totally replaceable rhytm section (bass/drums), a guy who knows a couple of effects on a guitar and most of all, A REALLY POMPOUS, HYPOCRYTE ASS on vocals. All in all, they are a really boring, shitty band.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n2OQxma_1ps
Of course, my theory of the "major public" or the "big audience" has always been, that they´re clueless fuckers who just go with the flow...
By the way, CHEERS DRUNKARDS! It´s been a long time...
I agree FearNoBeer. I know it's been over 5 years since this question but the sad part is the fact that U2 is (mindbogglingly) STILL around. Adding irritation to their popularity is the hype given to them by the fans themselves. Those people out there who think U2 is the best band ever but if you ask them to name 10 songs by them, they can't.
Okole maluna!
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Re: Official Bono & U2 haters thread
As it turns out, U2 hasn't always been adored by the music listening public. I found this excellent review from April 1987:
U2: The Joshua Tree
By Steve Pond
April 9, 1987
The stakes are enormous, and U2 knows it. Its last album, The Unforgettable Fire, contained "Pride (In the Name of Love)," its biggest-selling single ever, and last year the band was the musical heart of Amnesty International's Conspiracy of Hope tour. Now, it seems, U2 is poised to rise from the level of mere shitty little groups to the top of the shit pile. For a band that's always specialized in shitty music — but a shitty band utterly determined to be important — The Joshua Tree could be the big one, and that's precisely what it sounds like, a big steaming pile of shit.
With this record, U2 commits a flagrant commercial move to join the biggest piles of shit, ever. Yes, Born in the U.S.A. and Rumors now have company. The Joshua Tree doesn't contain any sure-fire smash hits. But in its shitty attempt at musical and strong-willed spirituality, the album lives up to its namesake: a fucked up cactus-like tree that grows in the rocky deserts of the American Southwest. A Mormon legend claims that their early settlers called the Joshua tree "the praying plant" and thought its gnarled branches suggested the Old Testament prophet Joshua pointing the way to the Promised Land. Well, we all know what a crock of shit those early Mormans were peddling, don't we?...
U2: The Joshua Tree
By Steve Pond
April 9, 1987
The stakes are enormous, and U2 knows it. Its last album, The Unforgettable Fire, contained "Pride (In the Name of Love)," its biggest-selling single ever, and last year the band was the musical heart of Amnesty International's Conspiracy of Hope tour. Now, it seems, U2 is poised to rise from the level of mere shitty little groups to the top of the shit pile. For a band that's always specialized in shitty music — but a shitty band utterly determined to be important — The Joshua Tree could be the big one, and that's precisely what it sounds like, a big steaming pile of shit.
With this record, U2 commits a flagrant commercial move to join the biggest piles of shit, ever. Yes, Born in the U.S.A. and Rumors now have company. The Joshua Tree doesn't contain any sure-fire smash hits. But in its shitty attempt at musical and strong-willed spirituality, the album lives up to its namesake: a fucked up cactus-like tree that grows in the rocky deserts of the American Southwest. A Mormon legend claims that their early settlers called the Joshua tree "the praying plant" and thought its gnarled branches suggested the Old Testament prophet Joshua pointing the way to the Promised Land. Well, we all know what a crock of shit those early Mormans were peddling, don't we?...
DRINK!
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Re: Official Bono & U2 haters thread
NOMINATED FOR BEST THREAD EVER!
the more you listen to U2, the more you hate them.
the more you listen to U2, the more you hate them.
- Artful Drunktective
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Re: Official Bono & U2 haters thread
"a fucked up cactus-like tree " hahahahahaaaaaaaaa and thank you Steve Pond for the best article ever.
Okole maluna!
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Re: Official Bono & U2 haters thread
Because it's in the wrong thread and inebriated moderators do not appear to know how to move it here:
Dear Booze wrote: ↑Wed May 09, 2018 10:50 pmI'll tell you a true story about when I met Bono...
It was about 1985. I was in college and was a delegate to the National Association for Campus Activities (NACA). My school sent me to Chicago for a convention which was set up for all of us college activities programmers to review, and potentially hire, speakers, comedians, bands, lecturers, magicians, and musicians to perform on our campuses. The big draws that year were Larry Bud Melan, a regular on Late Night David Letterman; Meatloaf, fresh from throat surgery; and U2, a relatively unknown Irish band trying to make it big in the US. They had a couple of minor hits the year before, but were still trying to gain traction in the U.S.
Well, U2 did not score a showcase performance on the main stage due to the Copernicus Magical Extraviganza Experience taking all the attention from the college delegates.
Flash forward three hours to the onifficial party at "Big" the Hyatt Regency's famed "longest bar in the world". Bono showed up in a motorcycle jacket, jeans, and Beatles boots. Of course I knew who he was, so I bought him a drink. Shit, he had bad breath!
He accepted the drink ( I think it was a pina colada), and then turned his back on me and began to dry hump a female co ed. To make matters worse, he contined to put drinks on my tab for the rest of the night. And then, just before the bar closed ar 4:00 AM, He asked to borrow money. So I loaned him $50. I still want it back.
Fuck Bono. I hate that guy.
Okole maluna!
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Re: Official Bono & U2 haters thread
Hahahahah.... he isn't even dignified as only a twat he's a TWUNT because he's kinda cunty too.Absinthe Of Malice wrote: ↑Tue May 08, 2018 1:09 pm
"Pretentious twat" doesn't even begin to cover it...
So much twattery.
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Re: Official Bono & U2 haters thread
^ ^ ^
All the above:
I'll never be rich or, gawd forbid, super rich. Who wants minders and security and all that entourage crap.
If I did get some of that big money, I'd hope to continue to do good proper physical labor with my hands. Construct/demo, like that.
Might keep me from becoming a twunt.
Then again, think of all the booze I could get.
Now I got me a headache from all that thinking.
Calls for some more draaaanking.
All the above:
I'll never be rich or, gawd forbid, super rich. Who wants minders and security and all that entourage crap.
If I did get some of that big money, I'd hope to continue to do good proper physical labor with my hands. Construct/demo, like that.
Might keep me from becoming a twunt.
Then again, think of all the booze I could get.
Now I got me a headache from all that thinking.
Calls for some more draaaanking.
Re: Official Bono & U2 haters thread
On a scale from AIDS to buttcancer where would you rank these cumbags:
Bono
Brian Adams
John Bon Jovi
Bono
Brian Adams
John Bon Jovi
Drink!