And that`s why I`m stuck in first grade. Without the puking thank vod! I`ll try my best though.Lush City wrote:I've learned that getting pleasantly toasted for most of the day without crashing and burning and puking in the toilet is a fine art. This website has assisted me in achieving this refined level of drunkard.
Learn something every day
Moderators: Oggar, Badfellow, Mr Boozificator, Artful Drunktective, mistah willies, NYDingbat, oettinger, Judge
Re: Learn something every day
Drink!
- ThirstyDrunk
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Re: Learn something every day
Today I learned that Screwball was one of the authors of The Port Huron Statement.
Like a desperate thirst in a raging drought
- Screwball
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Re: Learn something every day
I wrote the part demanding less talking in dinosaur porno movies. The talking makes it less believable.ThirstyDrunk wrote:Today I learned that Screwball was one of the authors of The Port Huron Statement.
- Lush City
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Re: Learn something every day
Wow! It's Screwball. Where have you been? Dinosaur porno? Godzilla and Raymond Burr just bummed you out?Screwball wrote:I wrote the part demanding less talking in dinosaur porno movies. The talking makes it less believable.ThirstyDrunk wrote:Today I learned that Screwball was one of the authors of The Port Huron Statement.
Found myself in the Matrix and took the red pill. Now I want the blue pill and my bottle and leave me alone.
- Screwball
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Re: Learn something every day
Been working a shitpot slew of hours. Too tired to type much. It has been work,come home and Drink, pass out.Lush City wrote:Wow! It's Screwball. Where have you been? Dinosaur porno? Godzilla and Raymond Burr just bummed you out?Screwball wrote:I wrote the part demanding less talking in dinosaur porno movies. The talking makes it less believable.ThirstyDrunk wrote:Today I learned that Screwball was one of the authors of The Port Huron Statement.
- ThirstyDrunk
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Re: Learn something every day
In the olden days people ate popcorn for breakfast. With milk and sugar if they were lucky.
Like a desperate thirst in a raging drought
Re: Learn something every day
And before that they had corn for dinner. With water and salt if they were really rich. Was not easy back then to find somehting to wash down with your Cru Bourgois bum wine.ThirstyDrunk wrote:In the olden days people ate popcorn for breakfast. With milk and sugar if they were lucky.
Drink!
- Savage
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Re: Learn something every day
Hah! They were lucky then, weren't they? We were lucky to have a wad of dirt, sweetened with a bit of mud. Aww, the kids these days...
And afterwards, mum and dad would beat us around the head and shoulders with a shovel, and make us clean the floor with our tongues.
Naw. Kids today have it easy.
And afterwards, mum and dad would beat us around the head and shoulders with a shovel, and make us clean the floor with our tongues.
Naw. Kids today have it easy.
like tears in rain
Re: Learn something every day
I just saw a TV commercial and learned that listerine is not a small proof mixer but mouthwash.
I hope in the next commercial I`ll learn what the difference is.
I hope in the next commercial I`ll learn what the difference is.
Drink!
- Lush City
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Re: Learn something every day
Wow! You remember the good old days too. We overcame a lot.Savage wrote:Hah! They were lucky then, weren't they? We were lucky to have a wad of dirt, sweetened with a bit of mud. Aww, the kids these days...
And afterwards, mum and dad would beat us around the head and shoulders with a shovel, and make us clean the floor with our tongues.
Naw. Kids today have it easy.
Found myself in the Matrix and took the red pill. Now I want the blue pill and my bottle and leave me alone.
- mistah willies
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Re: Learn something every day
Back in the day, we would fight the wolves on the way to school, and make them howl before the sun arose.Lush City wrote:Wow! You remember the good old days too. We overcame a lot.
When the sun went back down behind them hills, school got out. We would wake them knocked out wolves and ride them back home.
This was every day. Wolves don't learn as a dog can do.
- Lush City
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Re: Learn something every day
You crazy man!mistah willies wrote:...This was every day. Wolves don't learn as a dog can do.
Found myself in the Matrix and took the red pill. Now I want the blue pill and my bottle and leave me alone.
- Savage
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Re: Learn something every day
We had to walk uphill back and forth to school, in the middle of a snow blizzard. Yeah, we lived in Orange County (home of Disneyland, for all you ferriners) but hey, the laws of weather and so forth did not apply back in the seventies. And, when the '76 festival was occurring, what was I doing? I'll tell you! I was at work. Working. Back in the day when kids could work--well, we had to work. And we were damn glad to do so. Of course, I come from the generation when two eight year old little girls went door to door, trying to sell Brownie Scout calendars. And, later, when we were teenagers, we stuck our thumbs out to hitchhike to the beach. Dear God, what the hell?
like tears in rain
- mistah willies
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Re: Learn something every day
Johnson Smith Catalog was my goldmine for fake vomit and the cheaply made "hovercraft" on a wire back in the '70's.
I went door to door selling badly-made greeting cards to my neighbors, using the practiced speech included in the box. I ordered this form an ad in the back of one of those "Richie Rich" comic books.
I was a poor Injun, don't judge.
"Hello Ma'am, may I offer you an excellent opportunity to show the love you have for your various encounters and expat---"
"Oh my goodness! Fred! Come look at little Willie as a salesman! We will buy a box form you! Just wait while I get my brownie camera"
I made money from pity. Maybe I was an early grifter. or just a whore for Johnson Smith Catalog.
Damn.
I went door to door selling badly-made greeting cards to my neighbors, using the practiced speech included in the box. I ordered this form an ad in the back of one of those "Richie Rich" comic books.
I was a poor Injun, don't judge.
"Hello Ma'am, may I offer you an excellent opportunity to show the love you have for your various encounters and expat---"
"Oh my goodness! Fred! Come look at little Willie as a salesman! We will buy a box form you! Just wait while I get my brownie camera"
I made money from pity. Maybe I was an early grifter. or just a whore for Johnson Smith Catalog.
Damn.
- Savage
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- Joined: Mon Apr 21, 2003 1:16 am
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Re: Learn something every day
Hah! The neighborhood moms started asking me to baby sit when I was ten. My mom said, not until you're thirteen. So, at thirteen, in a new town full of strangers, I went door to door, with my particulars on 3 by 5 cards, introduced myself, and did my best to sell myself as the most responsible little child-minder ever. Worked. Boy, did it work. I was busier than I could handle. Had to turn down and farm out some business. But no probs; we all worked, back then. Seriously, people trusted my child-self to watch their newborns, handicapped kids, a house full of a dozen kids at a time, watch said kids for 48 hours at a time. Etc. I administered medications, adjusted hip braces, changed a baby with diapers up to his chest because he had no genitals, just a hole that he peed out of. I soothed what we now call autistic children. I came close to getting shot with a sharpened wire coat hanger wielded by a psychotic little eff. Also protected said little psycho from being beaten up after school by big boys twice my size. I broke up dog fights between five Saint Bernards. Dealt with an insane little dear who decided his parents dining room needed watering. Oof. One water hose, one oriental carpet, one Japanese lacquer dining room set. oy.
Starting price: fifty cents an hour. I raised it to seventy-five cents an hour. Mother of psycho kid who tried to kill me said she'd cap at sixty-five cents. I told her I was awfully busy. bye. bye. My nicest lady raised my rate to one dollar an hour. Mrs. W, wherever you are, you were a sweetie, and your boys were darlings.
Starting price: fifty cents an hour. I raised it to seventy-five cents an hour. Mother of psycho kid who tried to kill me said she'd cap at sixty-five cents. I told her I was awfully busy. bye. bye. My nicest lady raised my rate to one dollar an hour. Mrs. W, wherever you are, you were a sweetie, and your boys were darlings.
like tears in rain